Carry On Teacher (1959).en Subtitles

00:01:50,760 --> 00:01:52,(School bell

00:02:00,160 --> 00:02:01,Oooh!

00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:19,(Knock at door)

00:02:21,080 --> 00:02:22,Come in.

00:02:27,160 --> 00:02:29,- Miss Short told me to report, sir.
- Ah, yes, Stevens.

00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:31,Sit down.

00:02:34,520 --> 00:02:36,Now, what's all this about?

00:02:36,720 --> 00:02:41,Well, sir, I was larking about in maths, and Miss
Short said if I went on, she'd send me to you.

00:02:41,960 --> 00:02:43,I went on and she sent me, and here I **.

00:02:44,880 --> 00:02:46,- Sir.
- I see.

00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:48,And...

00:02:48,160 --> 00:02:50,- what do you think I should do about it?
- Cane me?

00:02:50,480 --> 00:02:52,And split a perfectly good magazine?

00:02:52,440 --> 00:02:53,Sir?

00:02:53,520 --> 00:02:55,Remove the padding, Stevens.

00:02:55,760 --> 00:02:58,You're crackling like a pan full of frying bacon.

00:03:02,360 --> 00:03:05,Caning you wouldn't tell me
why you think it more important to lark about

00:03:05,680 --> 00:03:07,- than attend to your lessons, would it?
- No, sir.

00:03:08,000 --> 00:03:10,I'd like to know.
Go home and write a lefter about it.

00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:11,Yes, sir.

00:03:11,880 --> 00:03:12,Well...

00:03:20,400 --> 00:03:23,Staff meeting on a Friday evening!

00:03:23,160 --> 00:03:25,Naturally, when our resistance is at its lowest.

00:03:31,560 --> 00:03:32,Stevens.

00:03:32,800 --> 00:03:34,What are you hanging about here for?

00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:37,- Nothing, Miss Short.
- Then cut along.

00:03:50,160 --> 00:03:53,It's time, Mr Adams. Had you forgotten?

00:03:53,120 --> 00:03:54,Forgotten? Me?

00:03:54,840 --> 00:03:56,Forgotten what?

00:03:56,760 --> 00:03:58,Mr Wakefield's meeting.

00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:06,- Any idea what the meeting's about?
- Discipline, I hope.

00:04:06,560 --> 00:04:10,It's high time Wakefield gave his jaw a rest
and his right arm some exercise.

00:04:21,040 --> 00:04:22,Sorry I'm late.

00:04:22,440 --> 00:04:24,WAKEFIELD: Ladies, gentlemen,

00:04:24,600 --> 00:04:28,as you know, I came here to Maudlin Street
straight from training college.

00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:30,I've been here 20 years.

00:04:30,600 --> 00:04:33,Seven years as assistant headmaster,

00:04:33,080 --> 00:04:37,and one term - this term - as acting headmaster
during Mr Carson's illness.

00:04:37,960 --> 00:04:40,I've decided it's time for a change.

00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:43,A brand new school opens next term

00:04:43,120 --> 00:04:46,not far from where I was born in the country.

00:04:46,280 --> 00:04:48,They've advertised for a headmaster.

00:04:49,880 --> 00:04:53,If| could get that post,
it could hardly be more perfect for me.

00:04:53,600 --> 00:04:55,I intend to apply.

00:04:55,520 --> 00:04:57,Oh, I'm sure we wish you all success.

00:04:57,400 --> 00:05:00,Please, just a moment. I need your help.

00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:03,That's why I've called you together. Listen.

00:05:03,360 --> 00:05:05,From the Ministry of Education.

00:05:05,600 --> 00:05:08,"The Ministry is granting research facilities
to Mr Alistair Grigg,

00:05:08,920 --> 00:05:12,the noted child psychiatrist,
in connection with his forthcoming book,

00:05:12,920 --> 00:05:15,Contemporary Juvenile Behaviour Patterns.

00:05:15,360 --> 00:05:20,With him on his tour of schools is our own
official inspector, Miss Felicity Wheeler,

00:05:20,080 --> 00:05:21,who reports direct to us

00:05:21,480 --> 00:05:24,on the standard of pupils' behaviour
and staff control.

00:05:24,520 --> 00:05:26,This is to inform you

00:05:26,320 --> 00:05:29,Mr Grigg and Miss Wheeler will spend
the last week of this term,

00:05:29,360 --> 00:05:31,beginning on Monday next, at your school,

00:05:31,280 --> 00:05:32,to fulfil their separate missions."

00:05:33,040 --> 00:05:36,Mr Wakefield, sir, he must not come here.

00:05:36,120 --> 00:05:38,That Grigg, he's a lunatic.

00:05:38,840 --> 00:05:41,I read one of his books once - Free Expression.

00:05:41,760 --> 00:05:44,You know what that means?
S***x in the cycle shed.

00:05:44,680 --> 00:05:46,Really?

00:05:46,920 --> 00:05:48,How disgusting.

00:05:48,480 --> 00:05:50,What a reactionary lot you are!

00:05:50,680 --> 00:05:53,There's something to be said
for the psychological approach.

00:05:53,560 --> 00:05:56,Think of a psychiatrist
loose among these children,

00:05:56,720 --> 00:05:59,telling them that mischief is
a form of self-expression

00:05:59,960 --> 00:06:01,and crime a complex.

00:06:01,680 --> 00:06:05,And a Ministry inspector, this Wheeler woman,
with him,

00:06:05,520 --> 00:06:08,reporting on their misbehaviour
from quite a different angle.

00:06:08,600 --> 00:06:12,Exactly.
It'll spread through the profession like wildfire

00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:14,that staff control here is non-existent!

00:06:14,840 --> 00:06:17,And there goes Mr Wakefield's new job.

00:06:17,280 --> 00:06:18,Puff!

00:06:18,720 --> 00:06:20,Precisely.

00:06:20,120 --> 00:06:23,The Ministry, in killing two birds with one stone,

00:06:23,240 --> 00:06:25,may, with terrible finality,

00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:27,kill my chances as well.

00:06:27,720 --> 00:06:30,- Yes, I suppose there is that to it.
- That would be a shame.

00:06:30,720 --> 00:06:33,Sir, there's only one thing to do to save yourself.

00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:34,Whack!

00:06:34,640 --> 00:06:36,Extraordinary theory.

00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:39,You bend a child double
in order to give it an upright character.

00:06:39,840 --> 00:06:42,Have you never sent a pupil to the Head
for caning?

00:06:42,520 --> 00:06:44,Of course, but never without a sense of defeat.

00:06:44,840 --> 00:06:48,Miss Short, Mr Milton,
let me put you both straight on that score.

00:06:48,240 --> 00:06:50,I don't like caning ever.

00:06:50,560 --> 00:06:52,Except as a last resort

00:06:53,040 --> 00:06:56,- Mr Grigg is totally opposed to it.
- Opposed to it, is he?

00:06:56,280 --> 00:06:57,Hoity-toity.

00:06:57,520 --> 00:06:59,He's obviously never faced a class here.

00:06:59,600 --> 00:07:01,Noxious ninny!

00:07:01,080 --> 00:07:04,Nevertheless, Mr Bean,
while he's here, caning's out!

00:07:05,040 --> 00:07:07,Then you're sunk, sir.

00:07:07,400 --> 00:07:08,Sunk?

00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:11,Oh, no, no, not necessarily.

00:07:11,160 --> 00:07:13,- I thought you were asleep.
- Hmm?

00:07:13,480 --> 00:07:17,Oh, just because I don't speak
as much as some people do,

00:07:17,600 --> 00:07:19,it doesn't mean to say that I don't do...

00:07:19,840 --> 00:07:21,that I'm not...

00:07:21,880 --> 00:07:25,Well, I mean, after all, he who listens most,
lisses meast.

00:07:27,000 --> 00:07:29,We can't hope to avoid trouble in this school.

00:07:29,960 --> 00:07:34,So let's try and keep it away from the visitors
as much as possible.

00:07:34,080 --> 00:07:37,How can we do this?
By being alert and rallying around Mr Wakefield.

00:07:39,240 --> 00:07:43,Sir, may I go now, please?
I've left my Bunsen burning.

00:08:04,760 --> 00:08:06,WAKEFIELD: If I could get that post,

00:08:06,800 --> 00:08:09,it could hardly be more perfect for me.

00:08:09,280 --> 00:08:10,I intend to apply.

00:08:27,080 --> 00:08:30,Now, listen, when they arrive,
we'll all go upstairs after them.

00:08:39,760 --> 00:08:41,Look out, Alf might get suspicious.

00:08:41,800 --> 00:08:46,Now, there's nothing more to tell you now, but
just back us up at all times. Break it up, scatter.

00:08:48,080 --> 00:08:50,Hello, you lot. Holding a strike meeting, are you?

00:08:50,440 --> 00:08:53,We were talking about our team's
disgraceful showing on Saturday.

00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:55,Disgraceful? Diabolical, I call it.

00:08:55,440 --> 00:08:57,You see the inside right muff every pass?

00:08:59,040 --> 00:09:00,STEVENS: Here come the two to get rid of.

00:09:16,920 --> 00:09:20,- Oh, Miss Wheeler, how nice to see you again.
- Hello, Mr Wakefield.

00:09:20,200 --> 00:09:22,This is Mr Grigg, child psychiatrist.

00:09:22,280 --> 00:09:24,- How do you do?
- Welcome, Mr Grigg.

00:09:25,680 --> 00:09:27,Shall we go inside?

00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:37,- One week, that's all I'd ask.
- That's all we've g***t.

00:09:37,560 --> 00:09:39,-Eh?
- Until the end of term.

00:09:39,240 --> 00:09:40,Come on, kids.

00:09:45,480 --> 00:09:47,(Blows whistle)

00:10:18,600 --> 00:10:20,(They giggle)

00:10:21,920 --> 00:10:24,Well, they say it's always best
to start the day with a song.

00:10:24,720 --> 00:10:28,So let's begin...