Chance In A Million s02e06 Naming The Day.eng Subtitles

00:00:02,890 --> 00:00:04,Here I go again.

00:00:05,190 --> 00:00:08,I hear the trumpet blow again.

00:00:09,110 --> 00:00:11,All the love blow again.

00:00:12,250 --> 00:00:14,Taking a chance on love.

00:00:16,329 --> 00:00:19,Things are mending now.

00:00:19,350 --> 00:00:22,I see a rainbow blending now.

00:00:23,250 --> 00:00:26,Here I have the ending now.

00:00:26,310 --> 00:00:30,Taking, taking a chance on love.

00:00:35,151 --> 00:00:37,Apparently not.

00:00:37,140 --> 00:00:39,According to this, died on Tuesday.

00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:41,Oh, let me see.

00:00:41,660 --> 00:00:43,What the f***k is this, though?

00:00:43,720 --> 00:00:45,It's spurned by lover.

00:00:45,940 --> 00:00:49,Threw petrol over self, lit match,
committed suicide.

00:00:49,501 --> 00:00:52,Well, they could have used a different
picture than that. You look all cross

00:00:52,700 --> 00:00:53,-eyed.

00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:56,See an engagement announcement?

00:00:56,160 --> 00:00:57,Oh, they've all seen it, lad.

00:00:58,180 --> 00:01:01,In a manner of speaking, engagement is
announced.

00:01:02,270 --> 00:01:06,between Miss Alison Little and three
Labrador puppies.

00:01:08,590 --> 00:01:09,House trained.

00:01:10,630 --> 00:01:12,Rented, furnished accommodation
required.

00:01:13,330 --> 00:01:15,£320 on nearest offer. Oh, no.

00:01:16,570 --> 00:01:19,Have a go and complain again, soil
-brained idiot.

00:01:19,690 --> 00:01:22,I would go myself, Tom, except it's my
exam today.

00:01:23,570 --> 00:01:27,Exam? Piano, part one theory and
practical.

00:01:27,830 --> 00:01:29,That's instead of my lesson.

00:01:29,770 --> 00:01:33,Yes. To tell you the truth, Tom, I'm not
very good at exams.

00:01:33,900 --> 00:01:35,I get this funny tummy.

00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:40,When I was seven, I was sick in my
pencil box before I took the Chanel

00:01:40,240 --> 00:01:41,test.

00:01:41,760 --> 00:01:44,Oh, I thought you just took those
things.

00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:54,In your stride.

00:01:57,930 --> 00:02:02,impression of being terribly self
-confident, Tom, but underneath it all,

00:02:02,390 --> 00:02:04,often just heaving away.

00:02:04,570 --> 00:02:06,It ruined my O -level.

00:02:06,650 --> 00:02:11,In my domestic science, the examiner was
just coming round when I threw up all

00:02:11,490 --> 00:02:13,over my balanced breakfast before.

00:02:13,231 --> 00:02:18,I g***t good marks for nutritional content
because they couldn't give me a great

00:02:18,130 --> 00:02:19,deal for presentation.

00:02:20,110 --> 00:02:23,But if it makes you unhappy, Alison,
just don't do it.

00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:32,Ever since you played Silent Night on
your tuba, I decided then and there that

00:02:32,320 --> 00:02:34,one day I'd accompany you on the piano.

00:02:34,480 --> 00:02:35,Lovely idea, Alison.

00:02:36,080 --> 00:02:41,Long winter evenings, just you and me
playing in front of the fire. Oh, yes.

00:02:43,020 --> 00:02:45,Then you could get out your tuba and I
could play the piano.

00:02:48,880 --> 00:02:49,Never mind.

00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:55,Regular practice, most important thing,
really. That's what Miss Dawson says I

00:02:55,420 --> 00:02:56,need mostly.

00:02:56,750 --> 00:02:58,That and a piano, of course.

00:02:59,490 --> 00:03:01,Tom, are you doing anything today?

00:03:01,410 --> 00:03:05,Yes, I **. Actually, painting front
door. Then round to pub for lunch.

00:03:05,490 --> 00:03:08,Only I was wondering if you could see
the vicar about today.

00:03:09,250 --> 00:03:10,You know, for the wedding.

00:03:10,511 --> 00:03:13,Oh, yes, of course, of course. Excellent
idea. Going to see him anyway. Want to

00:03:13,970 --> 00:03:14,sort something out.

00:03:14,890 --> 00:03:16,Oh, there's no problem, is there?

00:03:16,290 --> 00:03:21,No, no, no, no problem, really. Just a
slight snag. Might have to apply for

00:03:21,650 --> 00:03:22,divorce.

00:03:23,050 --> 00:03:24,Divorce?

00:03:28,550 --> 00:03:34,Yes. Happened some time ago, actually,
on the cycling holiday in North Wales

00:03:34,170 --> 00:03:39,with old friend. Came upon small tribe
of Yucatar Indians.

00:03:40,390 --> 00:03:45,Brought there by hippie commune for
wigwam building teach -in.

00:03:46,330 --> 00:03:47,What happened?

00:03:47,551 --> 00:03:48,No idea.

00:03:48,870 --> 00:03:52,Woke up next morning, head like a wicket
-keeper's box.

00:03:57,190 --> 00:03:58,Apparently...

00:03:58,780 --> 00:04:01,Married? Chieftain's youngest daughter.

00:04:01,960 --> 00:04:04,Six days it took me to get over the
mountain.

00:04:04,720 --> 00:04:05,Thoroughly exhausted.

00:04:05,900 --> 00:04:07,Yeah, like an emergent.

00:04:07,340 --> 00:04:09,But worse for friend, of course.

00:04:10,980 --> 00:04:15,Had to undergo warrior initiation
ceremony.

00:04:15,900 --> 00:04:18,Never been able to look at a flint
since.

00:04:20,420 --> 00:04:25,But this marriage, Tom, that wouldn't be
legally binding, would it?

00:04:25,660 --> 00:04:28,Hard to tell, really. Wrote to Los
Mochis.

00:04:28,920 --> 00:04:31,tribal homeland, but didn't get any
reply.

00:04:32,020 --> 00:04:36,Bound to blow over sooner or later.
Thought it a good idea to see Rector.

00:04:36,060 --> 00:04:37,of course.

00:04:40,880 --> 00:04:44,Well, perhaps you should have mentioned
it earlier.

00:04:44,460 --> 00:04:45,No, it doesn't matter, Tom.

00:04:45,880 --> 00:04:48,The main thing, Alison, not to get
upset.

00:04:49,280 --> 00:04:51,No, that's very thoughtful of you, Tom.

00:04:52,040 --> 00:04:54,Well, um, see you later, then.

00:04:58,830 --> 00:05:00,Going to library dressed like that?

00:05:00,850 --> 00:05:04,Oh, it's Roman Day at the library, Tom.
It's Mr Wingent's idea.

00:05:05,070 --> 00:05:07,We're all dressed as guardians of the
flame of knowledge.

00:05:08,850 --> 00:05:10,I'm a vestal virgin.

00:05:12,710 --> 00:05:14,Quite likely to stay that way.

00:05:40,520 --> 00:05:43,Yes, morning, yes. Chance, Tom Chance.

00:05:43,260 --> 00:05:47,Come to complain about picture on front
page of newspaper.

00:05:47,900 --> 00:05:51,Look, she's over 18 and she wants to
pose. No, no, no, no.

00:05:53,860 --> 00:05:54,Wrong picture.

00:05:55,800 --> 00:05:59,Unfortunate man burnt himself to death
on lover's doorstep.

00:06:00,220 --> 00:06:01,Oh, I see what you mean.

00:06:01,580 --> 00:06:03,Yes, you do look a bit cross -eyed,
don't you?

00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:09,Headline in appalling taste. Local man
fired by love. Well, that's just

00:06:09,520 --> 00:06:10,newspaper language.

00:06:10,420 --> 00:06:12,Yeah, it goes on. Phew, what a scorcher.

00:06:13,460 --> 00:06:16,Second point, man not dead at all.

00:06:17,020 --> 00:06:22,Sat on front doorstep, threw petrol
itself, missed it, burnt the door.

00:06:25,300 --> 00:06:27,So you're not the fellow who... No, no.

00:06:27,680 --> 00:06:29,Then what's it g***t to do with you? My
door.

00:06:30,200 --> 00:06:33,So drunk, missed his own house. Oh, I
see what you mean. Tell him what I'll

00:06:33,901 --> 00:06:34,Mr Chancellor.

00:06:34,640 --> 00:06:36,As soon as the reporter gets back in.

00:06:36,910 --> 00:06:42,I'll send him round to sort out the
story about the burning, sort out an

00:06:42,230 --> 00:06:45,to print, and give you a free insertion
of the correct engagement announcement.

00:06:45,950 --> 00:06:50,Better tell, editor, any more mistakes
likely to personally give him free

00:06:50,770 --> 00:06:54,insertion of entire print run up his
back page.

00:06:57,050 --> 00:06:58,All right?

00:07:02,320 --> 00:07:06,Colonel, get Martin Darling round to his
place. I want an apology and a cricket

00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:08,story that'll get that maniac out of my
hair.

00:07:11,860 --> 00:07:17,I was sorry to hear about Tom being
burned to death like that.

00:07:17,960 --> 00:07:21,What? I should imagine it was very
quick, though.

00:07:21,600 --> 00:07:25,Oh, you mean the newspaper thing? No,
that wasn't true, I'm afraid.

00:07:25,820 --> 00:07:28,Wasn't it? No, they muddled him up with
someone else.

00:07:28,581 --> 00:07:32,I'm afraid I've left his name off the
invitation.

00:07:32,500 --> 00:07:34,I don't know if he wants to come.

00:07:34,060 --> 00:07:37,Oh, you're getting married again. Not
again, Alison. Just trying to get

00:07:39,700 --> 00:07:41,Can you help me, Mr Dodge?

00:07:41,021 --> 00:07:42,Thank you.

00:07:42,280 --> 00:07:43,I wanted to check on the plumbing.

00:07:44,180 --> 00:07:46,Oh, you can use the staff one if you...