Small Town Big Story s01e02 How Many People Does He Need.eng Movie Subtitles
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00:00:01,640 --> 00:00:04,The following programme
contains strong language.
00:00:10,160 --> 00:00:12,I'm a valuable commodity.
00:00:12,360 --> 00:00:16,I see a dude coming at me,
trying to kill me?
00:00:16,080 --> 00:00:19,I tell myself, get killed!
00:00:19,080 --> 00:00:20,Catch the ball!
00:00:21,280 --> 00:00:24,Booya! Touchdown!
00:00:24,040 --> 00:00:26,I make miracles happen, baby!
00:00:27,920 --> 00:00:30,I've g***t an ant problem, Jerry.
00:00:30,280 --> 00:00:33,Nobody's looking out
for Rod Tidwell.
00:00:33,360 --> 00:00:37,And I'm supposed to be a superstar!
00:00:37,480 --> 00:00:39,No, not today, love. No.
00:00:39,240 --> 00:00:44,WOMAN: Crops have been destroyed
as far as the eye can see.
00:00:44,200 --> 00:00:50,There is talk of a beast.
They whisper the name Dobhar-chu.
00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:53,Do you believe it, An Dagda?
00:00:53,280 --> 00:00:55,Oh, my God.
I liked her.
00:00:56,400 --> 00:00:58,Ah, no, love. She's not well, love.
00:00:58,440 --> 00:01:03,Down your daggers.
He is of Dagda and I ** an Dagda.
00:01:04,160 --> 00:01:07,All shorts. He's all shorts
and no Mescal, isn't he?
00:01:07,080 --> 00:01:08,(PHONE RINGS)
00:01:12,120 --> 00:01:16,Then she sit there
denying and denying,
00:01:16,760 --> 00:01:20,and I feel a misty coldness
00:01:20,520 --> 00:01:25,climbing up my back and the skin
on my skull begin to creep,
00:01:25,320 --> 00:01:30,and I feel a clamp around my neck
and I cannot breathe air.
00:01:30,120 --> 00:01:31,God bless you, Jerry.
00:01:31,760 --> 00:01:34,But this is what you're gonna do
for me. Are you ready?
00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:38,I hear a voice, a screaming voice,
and it were my voice.
00:01:38,800 --> 00:01:42,This is a very personal,
very important thing.
00:01:42,160 --> 00:01:44,Hell, it's a family motto.
00:01:44,480 --> 00:01:47,And all at once I remembered
everything she'd done to me.
00:01:47,600 --> 00:01:48,Here we go.
00:01:50,160 --> 00:01:52,Show me the money.
00:01:54,640 --> 00:01:58,Show me the money!
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:01,(BREATHES RAGGEDLY)
00:02:03,400 --> 00:02:04,Phew.
00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:08,? THE BONK: Future
00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:23,? It all happened by accident
00:02:24,920 --> 00:02:26,? Bodies without names
00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:29,? Intersecting planes
00:02:30,760 --> 00:02:35,? Of their stranger vector veins
00:02:37,160 --> 00:02:41,? Europe is incontinent
00:02:42,000 --> 00:02:44,? But Philip's still alive...
00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:46,(INSTRUMENTAL BREAK)
00:03:08,560 --> 00:03:12,- Peasant girl number two. Wow.
- So, does that mean you're in the show?
00:03:12,600 --> 00:03:15,No, Dad, it's just a callback.
So, what's that then?
00:03:15,240 --> 00:03:18,You know what a callback is.
Don't play daft.
00:03:18,040 --> 00:03:21,I'm not playing anything. What is
it, like, a second interview?
00:03:21,160 --> 00:03:22,Yes. A call... back.
00:03:23,000 --> 00:03:27,Sorry. Forgot I married
Helen fecking Mirren over here.
00:03:27,120 --> 00:03:30,It's a small part
and I probably won't even get it. Is that kettle boiled?
00:03:30,600 --> 00:03:33,I thought I heard it,
like, a while back.
00:03:37,720 --> 00:03:39,(SIGHS) Were you nervous?
00:03:39,240 --> 00:03:42,I'd split myself
doing something like that, you know.
00:03:42,080 --> 00:03:44,(CHUCKLES) Gets it from me, obvs.
00:03:44,760 --> 00:03:48,I was just doing lines from a play
that we're studying at school, so.
00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:50,It was alright, actually.
00:03:50,200 --> 00:03:51,Oh, Keith McCurdle was there, Dad.
00:03:52,880 --> 00:03:54,He cried after his audition.
00:03:54,880 --> 00:03:57,Like, a lot.
He's quite mad, honestly.
00:03:57,640 --> 00:04:00,The maddest person to ever run
a petrol station, I'd say.
00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:02,I suppose lots of girls
will get callbacks,
00:04:02,640 --> 00:04:05,until they work out
what they really want.
00:04:05,320 --> 00:04:07,Toast there, son,
if you care for such things.
00:04:07,520 --> 00:04:10,Wait, who's getting a callback?
You can be my Oscar date.
00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:13,Actually, no, that's weird.
Did you really though?
00:04:13,840 --> 00:04:16,- Mm.
- Don't gloat, Joanne. You know what your brother's going through.
00:04:16,840 --> 00:04:19,I dropped out of college, Mum.
I don't have cancer.
00:04:19,560 --> 00:04:21,Wisht, would ya?
Fine, I'm taking a sabbatical.
00:04:21,800 --> 00:04:25,No, cancer. You never say cancer
in a doctor's house.
00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:28,That's like saying Hamlet
in a theatre.
00:04:28,160 --> 00:04:30,It's Macbeth, you plank.
00:04:30,680 --> 00:04:34,That's great, Jo. I didn't realise
it was the kind of TV show
00:04:34,160 --> 00:04:37,that had orcs and s***t in it.
Ha(!) It's only a callback.
00:04:38,600 --> 00:04:40,Here, when did this come in?
00:04:45,840 --> 00:04:48,Production can s***k my nuts.
00:05:22,280 --> 00:05:23,(THUNDERCLAP)
00:05:25,640 --> 00:05:27,(EERIE MUSIC)
00:05:28,040 --> 00:05:30,(PANICKED GASPS)
00:05:35,720 --> 00:05:37,(GRUNTS AND GROANS)
00:05:41,920 --> 00:05:44,MAN: 'In terms of our
principal cast, where are we?
00:05:44,280 --> 00:05:46,Are we happy? What's up?'
'More than happy, Brad.
00:05:46,840 --> 00:05:50,We sent a basket of cheese
or whatever to Jemima Rowlands
00:05:50,160 --> 00:05:53,and she's excited about playing
Bridget. She's bringing her cat.'
00:05:53,760 --> 00:05:56,All right,
sorry I missed the morning meeting.
00:05:56,240 --> 00:05:59,I think my gardener's stealing
from me, so I need to catch up.
00:05:59,280 --> 00:06:02,Where are we at with the male lead?
Really close is what I'm hearing.
00:06:02,120 --> 00:06:05,Has he signed contracts?
Pen has not been put to paper per se,
00:06:05,560 --> 00:06:07,but he is deeply committed
in principle.
00:06:07,680 --> 00:06:09,That's what he said a month ago.
And he meant it.
00:06:09,880 --> 00:06:12,Olaf Frieburger
is a huge name right now.
00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:15,I can't believe I g***t him.
F***k is that? I didn't ask for that.
00:06:15,440 --> 00:06:18,Son of a Danish film director,
00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:22,theatre trained in London,
started chopping wood on TikTok,
00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:26,two million followers,
made the Bond shortlist,
00:06:26,080 --> 00:06:29,models for both Dior and M&Ms.
00:06:29,320 --> 00:06:31,Wow, what a busy f***g bee.
00:06:31,320 --> 00:06:33,I just hope he's not
using our offer as leverage
00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:36,and we'll spend all of
pre-production chasing a shadow.
00:06:36,120 --> 00:06:40,- He's the guy, Brad. Trust me.
- And what about all the personal s***t?
00:06:40,120 --> 00:06:42,Well,
he does have very many children.
00:06:42,560 --> 00:06:45,Yeah, Google informs me
he has 14 f***g kids.
00:06:45,680 --> 00:06:48,What is he, a seahorse?
Well, you know what that tells us?
00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:50,What does that tell us?
00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:54,Olaf Frieburger never pulls out.
(SCOFFS)
00:06:54,520 --> 00:06:56,Was that a s***x joke there, Wendy?
00:06:56,840 --> 00:06:58,Yeah, it was, Brad.
00:06:58,760 --> 00:07:01,Not bad. Pretty solid.
00:07:01,360 --> 00:07:03,(QUIRKY UPBEAT MUSIC)
00:07:28,920 --> 00:07:32,- You ready, Dad?
- S***t the f***g plants, there he is!
00:07:32,560 --> 00:07:35,(CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY) Are you
- alright, Sonny? - Are you alright?
00:07:36,720 --> 00:07:38,Better than ever,
as the saying goes.
00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:43,Are we still doing
the pub for lunch? Aye. I have a committee thing, so.
00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:48,I found p***n mags in there one time.
What's in there now?
00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:57,It's so nice to have you home,
son, reminding us of things.
00:07:57,720 --> 00:07:59,(CHUCKLES)
00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:06,We've completed option agreements
on most of the recurring cast
00:08:06,680 --> 00:08:08,and we'll spend a few days
here in Drumban,
00:08:08,560 --> 00:08:11,hoping we can save money
on some day players with local hire.
00:08:11,920 --> 00:08:14,I did the town musical there once.
Yeah.
00:08:14,280 --> 00:08:17,Jemima Rowlands has started
vocal coaching and accent work.
00:08:17,640 --> 00:08:21,But what we really need now
is clarification
00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:24,on who's playing the Dagda.
We know who's playing the Dagda.
00:08:24,280 --> 00:08:26,Because it's a very important role -
00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:30,not just narratively, but
- culturally. - No, yeah, I've read it.
00:08:30,280 --> 00:08:35,And I...
contains strong language.
00:00:10,160 --> 00:00:12,I'm a valuable commodity.
00:00:12,360 --> 00:00:16,I see a dude coming at me,
trying to kill me?
00:00:16,080 --> 00:00:19,I tell myself, get killed!
00:00:19,080 --> 00:00:20,Catch the ball!
00:00:21,280 --> 00:00:24,Booya! Touchdown!
00:00:24,040 --> 00:00:26,I make miracles happen, baby!
00:00:27,920 --> 00:00:30,I've g***t an ant problem, Jerry.
00:00:30,280 --> 00:00:33,Nobody's looking out
for Rod Tidwell.
00:00:33,360 --> 00:00:37,And I'm supposed to be a superstar!
00:00:37,480 --> 00:00:39,No, not today, love. No.
00:00:39,240 --> 00:00:44,WOMAN: Crops have been destroyed
as far as the eye can see.
00:00:44,200 --> 00:00:50,There is talk of a beast.
They whisper the name Dobhar-chu.
00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:53,Do you believe it, An Dagda?
00:00:53,280 --> 00:00:55,Oh, my God.
I liked her.
00:00:56,400 --> 00:00:58,Ah, no, love. She's not well, love.
00:00:58,440 --> 00:01:03,Down your daggers.
He is of Dagda and I ** an Dagda.
00:01:04,160 --> 00:01:07,All shorts. He's all shorts
and no Mescal, isn't he?
00:01:07,080 --> 00:01:08,(PHONE RINGS)
00:01:12,120 --> 00:01:16,Then she sit there
denying and denying,
00:01:16,760 --> 00:01:20,and I feel a misty coldness
00:01:20,520 --> 00:01:25,climbing up my back and the skin
on my skull begin to creep,
00:01:25,320 --> 00:01:30,and I feel a clamp around my neck
and I cannot breathe air.
00:01:30,120 --> 00:01:31,God bless you, Jerry.
00:01:31,760 --> 00:01:34,But this is what you're gonna do
for me. Are you ready?
00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:38,I hear a voice, a screaming voice,
and it were my voice.
00:01:38,800 --> 00:01:42,This is a very personal,
very important thing.
00:01:42,160 --> 00:01:44,Hell, it's a family motto.
00:01:44,480 --> 00:01:47,And all at once I remembered
everything she'd done to me.
00:01:47,600 --> 00:01:48,Here we go.
00:01:50,160 --> 00:01:52,Show me the money.
00:01:54,640 --> 00:01:58,Show me the money!
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:01,(BREATHES RAGGEDLY)
00:02:03,400 --> 00:02:04,Phew.
00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:08,? THE BONK: Future
00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:23,? It all happened by accident
00:02:24,920 --> 00:02:26,? Bodies without names
00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:29,? Intersecting planes
00:02:30,760 --> 00:02:35,? Of their stranger vector veins
00:02:37,160 --> 00:02:41,? Europe is incontinent
00:02:42,000 --> 00:02:44,? But Philip's still alive...
00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:46,(INSTRUMENTAL BREAK)
00:03:08,560 --> 00:03:12,- Peasant girl number two. Wow.
- So, does that mean you're in the show?
00:03:12,600 --> 00:03:15,No, Dad, it's just a callback.
So, what's that then?
00:03:15,240 --> 00:03:18,You know what a callback is.
Don't play daft.
00:03:18,040 --> 00:03:21,I'm not playing anything. What is
it, like, a second interview?
00:03:21,160 --> 00:03:22,Yes. A call... back.
00:03:23,000 --> 00:03:27,Sorry. Forgot I married
Helen fecking Mirren over here.
00:03:27,120 --> 00:03:30,It's a small part
and I probably won't even get it. Is that kettle boiled?
00:03:30,600 --> 00:03:33,I thought I heard it,
like, a while back.
00:03:37,720 --> 00:03:39,(SIGHS) Were you nervous?
00:03:39,240 --> 00:03:42,I'd split myself
doing something like that, you know.
00:03:42,080 --> 00:03:44,(CHUCKLES) Gets it from me, obvs.
00:03:44,760 --> 00:03:48,I was just doing lines from a play
that we're studying at school, so.
00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:50,It was alright, actually.
00:03:50,200 --> 00:03:51,Oh, Keith McCurdle was there, Dad.
00:03:52,880 --> 00:03:54,He cried after his audition.
00:03:54,880 --> 00:03:57,Like, a lot.
He's quite mad, honestly.
00:03:57,640 --> 00:04:00,The maddest person to ever run
a petrol station, I'd say.
00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:02,I suppose lots of girls
will get callbacks,
00:04:02,640 --> 00:04:05,until they work out
what they really want.
00:04:05,320 --> 00:04:07,Toast there, son,
if you care for such things.
00:04:07,520 --> 00:04:10,Wait, who's getting a callback?
You can be my Oscar date.
00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:13,Actually, no, that's weird.
Did you really though?
00:04:13,840 --> 00:04:16,- Mm.
- Don't gloat, Joanne. You know what your brother's going through.
00:04:16,840 --> 00:04:19,I dropped out of college, Mum.
I don't have cancer.
00:04:19,560 --> 00:04:21,Wisht, would ya?
Fine, I'm taking a sabbatical.
00:04:21,800 --> 00:04:25,No, cancer. You never say cancer
in a doctor's house.
00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:28,That's like saying Hamlet
in a theatre.
00:04:28,160 --> 00:04:30,It's Macbeth, you plank.
00:04:30,680 --> 00:04:34,That's great, Jo. I didn't realise
it was the kind of TV show
00:04:34,160 --> 00:04:37,that had orcs and s***t in it.
Ha(!) It's only a callback.
00:04:38,600 --> 00:04:40,Here, when did this come in?
00:04:45,840 --> 00:04:48,Production can s***k my nuts.
00:05:22,280 --> 00:05:23,(THUNDERCLAP)
00:05:25,640 --> 00:05:27,(EERIE MUSIC)
00:05:28,040 --> 00:05:30,(PANICKED GASPS)
00:05:35,720 --> 00:05:37,(GRUNTS AND GROANS)
00:05:41,920 --> 00:05:44,MAN: 'In terms of our
principal cast, where are we?
00:05:44,280 --> 00:05:46,Are we happy? What's up?'
'More than happy, Brad.
00:05:46,840 --> 00:05:50,We sent a basket of cheese
or whatever to Jemima Rowlands
00:05:50,160 --> 00:05:53,and she's excited about playing
Bridget. She's bringing her cat.'
00:05:53,760 --> 00:05:56,All right,
sorry I missed the morning meeting.
00:05:56,240 --> 00:05:59,I think my gardener's stealing
from me, so I need to catch up.
00:05:59,280 --> 00:06:02,Where are we at with the male lead?
Really close is what I'm hearing.
00:06:02,120 --> 00:06:05,Has he signed contracts?
Pen has not been put to paper per se,
00:06:05,560 --> 00:06:07,but he is deeply committed
in principle.
00:06:07,680 --> 00:06:09,That's what he said a month ago.
And he meant it.
00:06:09,880 --> 00:06:12,Olaf Frieburger
is a huge name right now.
00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:15,I can't believe I g***t him.
F***k is that? I didn't ask for that.
00:06:15,440 --> 00:06:18,Son of a Danish film director,
00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:22,theatre trained in London,
started chopping wood on TikTok,
00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:26,two million followers,
made the Bond shortlist,
00:06:26,080 --> 00:06:29,models for both Dior and M&Ms.
00:06:29,320 --> 00:06:31,Wow, what a busy f***g bee.
00:06:31,320 --> 00:06:33,I just hope he's not
using our offer as leverage
00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:36,and we'll spend all of
pre-production chasing a shadow.
00:06:36,120 --> 00:06:40,- He's the guy, Brad. Trust me.
- And what about all the personal s***t?
00:06:40,120 --> 00:06:42,Well,
he does have very many children.
00:06:42,560 --> 00:06:45,Yeah, Google informs me
he has 14 f***g kids.
00:06:45,680 --> 00:06:48,What is he, a seahorse?
Well, you know what that tells us?
00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:50,What does that tell us?
00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:54,Olaf Frieburger never pulls out.
(SCOFFS)
00:06:54,520 --> 00:06:56,Was that a s***x joke there, Wendy?
00:06:56,840 --> 00:06:58,Yeah, it was, Brad.
00:06:58,760 --> 00:07:01,Not bad. Pretty solid.
00:07:01,360 --> 00:07:03,(QUIRKY UPBEAT MUSIC)
00:07:28,920 --> 00:07:32,- You ready, Dad?
- S***t the f***g plants, there he is!
00:07:32,560 --> 00:07:35,(CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY) Are you
- alright, Sonny? - Are you alright?
00:07:36,720 --> 00:07:38,Better than ever,
as the saying goes.
00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:43,Are we still doing
the pub for lunch? Aye. I have a committee thing, so.
00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:48,I found p***n mags in there one time.
What's in there now?
00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:57,It's so nice to have you home,
son, reminding us of things.
00:07:57,720 --> 00:07:59,(CHUCKLES)
00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:06,We've completed option agreements
on most of the recurring cast
00:08:06,680 --> 00:08:08,and we'll spend a few days
here in Drumban,
00:08:08,560 --> 00:08:11,hoping we can save money
on some day players with local hire.
00:08:11,920 --> 00:08:14,I did the town musical there once.
Yeah.
00:08:14,280 --> 00:08:17,Jemima Rowlands has started
vocal coaching and accent work.
00:08:17,640 --> 00:08:21,But what we really need now
is clarification
00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:24,on who's playing the Dagda.
We know who's playing the Dagda.
00:08:24,280 --> 00:08:26,Because it's a very important role -
00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:30,not just narratively, but
- culturally. - No, yeah, I've read it.
00:08:30,280 --> 00:08:35,And I...
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