The Real ONeals s02e15 The Real Mr. Nice Guy.eng Subtitles

At 00:00:00,116, Character said: Kenny: When you're a creative individual

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At 00:00:01,729, Character said: at a Catholic high school,

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At 00:00:02,905, Character said: most classes feel like the
final season of "Lost"...

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At 00:00:05,424, Character said: Unsatisfying, and the cute
guys are all straight,

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At 00:00:07,992, Character said: which is why I'm so excited to
be taking music appreciation.

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At 00:00:13,857, Character said: What are you doing here?

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At 00:00:15,158, Character said: Enriching my mind and my spirit,

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At 00:00:16,960, Character said: like that time I read The New Yorker

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At 00:00:18,661, Character said: not just for the cartoons.

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At 00:00:19,929, Character said: What are you doing here?

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At 00:00:20,939, Character said: [Laughing] Oh, Kenny.

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At 00:00:22,807, Character said: Stupid, stupid Kenny.
[School bell rings]

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At 00:00:24,968, Character said: I don't get what's so funny.

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At 00:00:26,175, Character said: Well, music appreciation is a joke.

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At 00:00:28,480, Character said: I seriously doubt that.

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At 00:00:30,406, Character said: All right, kids.

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At 00:00:31,749, Character said: Welcome to the wonderful world of music.

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At 00:00:34,219, Character said: Take out a piece of paper,
write something on it,

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At 00:00:36,921, Character said: and grade yourselves.

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At 00:00:38,690, Character said: And do not interrupt me while
I'm doing my scratch-off.

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At 00:00:40,992, Character said: [Clears throat]

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At 00:00:43,962, Character said: Ms. Dunn? Kenny O'Neal here.

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At 00:00:45,530, Character said: I, for one, ** thirsty for
a bit of music education.

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At 00:00:51,060, Character said: Don't mind my brother, Ms. Dunn.

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At 00:00:52,695, Character said: He's gay, so he likes
unnecessary conflict.

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At 00:00:54,597, Character said: Sit down, Kenny. This isn't Bravo.

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At 00:00:56,132, Character said: [Gasps] Oh, my God.

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At 00:00:59,469, Character said: I just won $1 million.

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At 00:01:01,885, Character said: I'm free.

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At 00:01:02,987, Character said: The nightmare is over!

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At 00:01:05,475, Character said: But you're still gonna
teach, though, yeah?

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At 00:01:07,177, Character said: Why start now?

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At 00:01:08,378, Character said: Adi?s [bleep]

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At 00:01:12,174, Character said:
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At 00:01:16,286, Character said: All right, help me decide, Father Phil.

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At 00:01:18,988, Character said: What's a better appetizer
for the bishop...

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At 00:01:20,899, Character said: Deviled eggs or pigs in a blanket?

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At 00:01:22,400, Character said: Well, invoking the devil with
the bishop is probably a no-no,

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At 00:01:25,737, Character said: but let me taste.

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At 00:01:28,785, Character said: Mmm. Okay.

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At 00:01:31,075, Character said: Devil be damned, this is a yes-yes.

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At 00:01:33,211, Character said: Oh, thank God. I'm just
so nervous and excited.

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At 00:01:35,813, Character said: I cannot believe that the church

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At 00:01:37,448, Character said: chose our family to host
a dinner for the bishop.

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At 00:01:39,891, Character said: Ever since the
Stackwells' murder-suicide,

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At 00:01:41,753, Character said: you are our top divorced family.

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At 00:01:43,588, Character said: That is so nice to hear.

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At 00:01:45,557, Character said: It's a real honor.

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At 00:01:46,691, Character said: What's also nice is
that it gives us a chance

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At 00:01:49,093, Character said: to show everyone that, you know,

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At 00:01:50,328, Character said: the whole dad-living-
in-the-garage situation

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At 00:01:52,230, Character said: not only works, but it has
the approval of the church.

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At 00:01:54,599, Character said: It is not a garage.

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At 00:01:56,234, Character said: I've told you a million
times... It's a tiny house.

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At 00:01:58,870, Character said: Father Phil. Ooh! Hello, deviled eggs.

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At 00:02:00,704, Character said: Ahh! We have two days to get
this place ready for the bishop,

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At 00:02:03,274, Character said: and you still haven't
fixed the garbage disposal.

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At 00:02:07,912, Character said: I never g***t this kind of
'tude from the Stackwells.

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At 00:02:10,940, Character said: [Door opens, closes]

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At 00:02:12,609, Character said: [Sighs]

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At 00:02:14,510, Character said: You are never gonna believe
what happened at school today.

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At 00:02:16,512, Character said: You actually paid attention
and learned something?

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At 00:02:18,380, Character said: [Chuckles] Hey, that's a good one. No.

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At 00:02:21,851, Character said: So, uh, my teacher
Ms. Dunn won $1 million

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At 00:02:24,454, Character said: off a scratch-off ticket,

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At 00:02:25,692, Character said: and then she said some
sweet curse words and quit.

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At 00:02:27,624, Character said: It was... It was awesome.

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At 00:02:28,625, Character said: Wait, wait. Ms. Dunn?

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At 00:02:30,059, Character said: - Short, big eyes, frizzy hair?
- Yeah. That's her.

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At 00:02:34,464, Character said: You know what? I'm feeling lucky today.

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At 00:02:37,100, Character said: I'm gonna have one of
those scratchers, please.

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At 00:02:39,269, Character said: [Police radio chatter]

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At 00:02:41,804, Character said: Ms. Dunn, right?

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At 00:02:43,673, Character said: Oh, is that all you have?

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At 00:02:44,974, Character said: I also have a cat and
a very loving niece.

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At 00:02:47,610, Character said: Why don't you go ahead?

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At 00:02:48,978, Character said: Oh, thanks.

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At 00:02:50,947, Character said: One scratch-off, please.

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At 00:02:52,815, Character said: And a packet of condoms.

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At 00:02:53,883, Character said: You never know.

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At 00:02:57,053, Character said: I let her go ahead of me.

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At 00:02:58,621, Character said: That was supposed to be my ticket.

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At 00:03:01,225, Character said: That was supposed to be my $1 million.

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At 00:03:03,608, Character said: My whole life could have been different.

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At 00:03:05,528, Character said: She only has a cat and a niece, Dad.

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At 00:03:07,697, Character said: So you can get in there.

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At 00:03:11,367, Character said:

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At 00:03:14,437, Character said: Thanks for coming in on
such short notice, everybody.

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At 00:03:17,140, Character said: As you know, Ms. Dunn hit the jackpot

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At 00:03:18,975, Character said: and never has to come back
to this hell-ishly wonderful

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At 00:03:21,945, Character said: institution of learning.

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At 00:03:23,212, Character said: So just sit tight while
I consult with my team,

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At 00:03:25,715, Character said: and I'll be back in a jiff.

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At 00:03:27,050, Character said: Are these the new teaching candidates

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At 00:03:29,319, Character said: for music appreciation class?

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At 00:03:31,187, Character said: Tired.

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At 00:03:32,789, Character said: Dead inside.

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At 00:03:34,390, Character said: Uninspired.

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At 00:03:35,692, Character said: [ Gasps ] Wait a second.

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At 00:03:37,460, Character said: Italian loafer, no socks.

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At 00:03:39,329, Character said: A Patek Philippe watch.

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At 00:03:41,698, Character said: Gingham and plaid on purpose?

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At 00:03:43,766, Character said: This man is a homosexual.

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At 00:03:49,605, Character said: Hello. I'm Kenny O'Neal.

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At 00:03:51,174, Character said: Hi. I'm Mr. Peters.

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At 00:03:52,175, Character said: Hi. [Chuckles]

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At 00:03:53,176, Character said: Um, I'm a student helper.

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At 00:03:54,677, Character said: I'm making photocopies of r?sum?s

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At 00:03:56,179, Character said: for Vice Principal Murray.

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At 00:03:57,213, Character said: May I see yours?

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At 00:04:01,951, Character said: 20 years on Broadway?

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At 00:04:04,921, Character said: Gay Men's Chorus?

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At 00:04:07,056, Character said: Former personal assistant
to Elaine Stritch?!

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At 00:04:10,159, Character said: Not bad.

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At 00:04:11,561, Character said: Oh, my God. This guy might
be the gay role model

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At 00:04:14,430, Character said: I've been looking for.

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At 00:04:15,698, Character said: He could help me become
the best version of me,

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At 00:04:18,334, Character said: or rather, do, re, mi.

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At 00:04:20,470, Character said: Let's start at the very beginning.

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At 00:04:24,240, Character said:
A very good place to start
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At 00:04:27,944, Character said:
When you read, you begin with...
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At 00:04:30,313, Character said: Men's Health magazine?

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At 00:04:31,614, Character said: A-B-C.

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At 00:04:33,583, Character said:
When you sing, you
begin with do, re, mi
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At 00:04:37,353, Character said:
Do, re, mi
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At 00:04:39,589, Character said: Yes!

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At 00:04:40,656, Character said:
Doe
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At 00:04:41,791, Character said:
A deer, a female deer
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At 00:04:44,494, Character said:
Ray
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At 00:04:45,462, Character said:
A drop of golden sun
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At 00:04:48,231, Character said: Me!

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At 00:04:49,014, Character said:
A name I call myself [Camera shutter clicks]

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At 00:04:51,834, Character said: Far.

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At 00:04:52,702, Character said:
A long, long way to run
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At 00:04:55,204, Character said:
Sew, a needle pulling thread
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At 00:04:58,741, Character said: -
La, a note to follow so - [Woman singing operatically]

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At 00:05:02,445, Character said:
Tea, a drink with jam and bread
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At 00:05:05,748, Character said:
That will bring us back to do
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At 00:05:09,018, Character said: - Ow.
- No carbs.

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At 00:05:10,219, Character said: We bake for others.

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At 00:05:12,355, Character said: You have to hire Mr. Peters.

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At 00:05:13,856, Character said: Oh, thank God!

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At 00:05:15,091, Character said: This thing keeps saying,
"Ask again. Ask again."

144...