The Bernie Mac Show Night Of Terror Aac2 0 H 264-squalor S05E06 Subtitles

At 00:00:02,986, Character said: (theme music playing)

2
At 00:00:20,337, Character said: Uh, sweetie, don't throw
the card over there.

3
At 00:00:22,222, Character said: How ** I supposed
to know who it's from?

4
At 00:00:24,049, Character said: (scoffs)
Who cares?

5
At 00:00:27,761, Character said: Oh, Night of Terror, yes!

6
At 00:00:29,638, Character said: Oh, happy birthday to me.

7
At 00:00:33,725, Character said: Dang, Jordan,

8
At 00:00:35,235, Character said: you made out
like a bandit.

9
At 00:00:36,904, Character said: You g***t more gifts
than we did

10
At 00:00:38,355, Character said: for our wedding,
huh, baby?

11
At 00:00:40,065, Character said: A rocket ship
and a paratrooper.

12
At 00:00:42,150, Character said: I'm going to go
launch it.

13
At 00:00:43,819, Character said: Son,
it's too doggone
dark, I think.

14
At 00:00:45,570, Character said: You're going to mess around
and you going to lose it.

15
At 00:00:46,988, Character said: I'm not going
to lose it.

16
At 00:00:48,198, Character said: He has
his own parachute.

17
At 00:00:49,574, Character said: It's your toy, man.

18
At 00:00:50,918, Character said: Go on and do
what you g***t to do.

19
At 00:00:52,160, Character said: (funky music playing)

20
At 00:01:06,216, Character said: Honey,
want some punch?

21
At 00:01:07,968, Character said: Yeah, I'll take
a little bit.

22
At 00:01:09,695, Character said: Three, two one.

23
At 00:01:11,721, Character said: Houston,
we have liftoff.

24
At 00:01:15,475, Character said: Ooh.

25
At 00:01:22,941, Character said: America, I thought they were
supposed to get smarter

26
At 00:01:26,203, Character said: as they g***t older.

27
At 00:01:27,988, Character said: JORDAN:
It still hasn't
come down.

28
At 00:01:29,698, Character said: Shoot, that boy's daddy
going to come back

29
At 00:01:31,825, Character said: before that rocket does.

30
At 00:01:33,493, Character said: Huh, stupid.

31
At 00:01:36,121, Character said: WOMAN (on TV):
In the prairie and Midwest,

32
At 00:01:37,873, Character said: predators like black bears,
wolves, and bobcats

33
At 00:01:40,417, Character said: are beginning to return
to spots

34
At 00:01:42,169, Character said: they haven't been seen
in years...

35
At 00:01:43,712, Character said: You g***t to be kidding.

36
At 00:01:45,505, Character said: It's 9:00.

37
At 00:01:46,640, Character said: What you kids
think you're doing?

38
At 00:01:48,049, Character said: Time for bed.
Let's go.

39
At 00:01:51,636, Character said: You hear me, son?

40
At 00:01:52,980, Character said: Yes, but I turned 13.

41
At 00:01:54,556, Character said: Well, happy birthday.
Good night.

42
At 00:01:57,267, Character said: No, but you said
that when I turned 13,

43
At 00:01:59,102, Character said: I could stay up
till 10:00.

44
At 00:02:00,579, Character said: You promised.

45
At 00:02:02,939, Character said: I did promise him,
but America,

46
At 00:02:04,658, Character said: I never thought
the boy'd live this long.

47
At 00:02:06,919, Character said: With his asthma? Shoot.

48
At 00:02:08,495, Character said: Those 13 candles
nearly killed him tonight.

49
At 00:02:10,906, Character said: Shoot.

50
At 00:02:13,575, Character said: (wheezing)

51
At 00:02:19,748, Character said: (coughing)

52
At 00:02:22,885, Character said: "I did it."

53
At 00:02:24,169, Character said: Hey, how come he
gets to stay up?

54
At 00:02:26,546, Character said: Because Jordan is becoming
a young man.

55
At 00:02:29,591, Character said: That's not fair.

56
At 00:02:30,617, Character said: Baby's g***t to go
to bed now.

57
At 00:02:32,260, Character said: (laughs meanly)
Look here, son,

58
At 00:02:34,554, Character said: let me tell you
something right now.

59
At 00:02:36,223, Character said: You do everything
you have to do

60
At 00:02:38,066, Character said: to be ready for bed
within an hour,
you understand me?

61
At 00:02:40,393, Character said: That means brush your teeth,
wash your face,

62
At 00:02:42,729, Character said: and have your PJs on,

63
At 00:02:43,813, Character said: you g***t me?

64
At 00:02:47,242, Character said: Say, honey, leave Saturday open

65
At 00:02:50,153, Character said: for the auction
at the kids' school.

66
At 00:02:51,780, Character said: You g***t to be kidding.

67
At 00:02:53,698, Character said: You thinking about
showing your face

68
At 00:02:55,242, Character said: after what happened
last year?

69
At 00:02:56,818, Character said: What? Oh, please.
Nobody remembers that.

70
At 00:03:00,747, Character said: Okay.

71
At 00:03:01,998, Character said: You know what?
Say what you want,

72
At 00:03:03,708, Character said: but they asked me
to be the host this year.

73
At 00:03:06,920, Character said: Why? Because I have
sales savvy and personality.

74
At 00:03:11,341, Character said: Okay, Personality,
I'm just trying
to keep you from

75
At 00:03:15,178, Character said: getting your name
written up on the church
bulletin board again.

76
At 00:03:18,682, Character said: What?
JORDAN: Hey, let it go!
I was in here first!

77
At 00:03:21,268, Character said: BRYANA: Get out!
I was in here first!

78
At 00:03:22,945, Character said: JORDAN:
Stop it! Give it...
No, you get out...

79
At 00:03:24,020, Character said: Come on, baby.
BRYANA:
Stop!

80
At 00:03:25,563, Character said: JORDAN: Don't squeeze
toothpaste on me!
Ooh!

81
At 00:03:26,982, Character said: (both grunting)

82
At 00:03:28,817, Character said: What the hell's
going on in here?
She started it.

83
At 00:03:31,361, Character said: She squirted toothpaste
all over me.

84
At 00:03:33,488, Character said: I don't care who started it!
Baby Girl, get to bed!

85
At 00:03:35,448, Character said: I'll take care
of Jordan.

86
At 00:03:37,200, Character said: (grunts)

87
At 00:03:38,368, Character said: What is wrong with you, boy?

88
At 00:03:40,578, Character said: You're her big brother.

89
At 00:03:42,247, Character said: Yeah, but she makes
me crazy.

90
At 00:03:44,249, Character said: I don't care,
Jordan!

91
At 00:03:45,333, Character said: She's a kid!

92
At 00:03:46,960, Character said: You're 13 years old
now, son!

93
At 00:03:49,429, Character said: You g***t to start
acting like a man!

94
At 00:03:51,482, Character said: Shoot, when I was 13,
I was 20!

95
At 00:03:54,342, Character said: Now clean this mess
up in here and get to bed!

96
At 00:03:56,428, Character said: But I get to stay up
an extra hour.

97
At 00:03:58,054, Character said: Not anymore.
You messed that up

98
At 00:04:00,223, Character said: when you messed
with your baby sister.

99
At 00:04:02,517, Character said: I'll kill her.
What?

100
At 00:04:04,111, Character said: You're not going
to do nothing.

101
At 00:04:06,146, Character said: You better not
touch her.

102
At 00:04:07,647, Character said: Repeat after me:
"I'm not going
to touch her."

103
At 00:04:09,116, Character said: I won't touch her.

104
At 00:04:11,043, Character said: No. "I'm not going
to touch her."

105
At 00:04:12,610, Character said: I'm not going
to touch her.

106
At 00:04:17,324, Character said: (beeping)

107
At 00:04:31,546, Character said: (long, drawn out note)

108
At 00:04:36,509, Character said: SINGER: ♪ You're on fire,
what's up, man? ♪

109
At 00:04:41,848, Character said: ♪ Now what you doin',
what's up with that? ♪

110
At 00:04:43,683, Character said: ♪ Man, I won't know
where to go ♪

111
At 00:04:45,518, Character said: ♪ Ain't your man ♪

112
At 00:04:47,145, Character said: Oh, Lord...
that boy is nasty.

113
At 00:04:52,025, Character said: Ugh! And this one here...

114
At 00:04:55,412, Character said: this one like
a crime scene photograph.

115
At 00:04:58,656, Character said: That's a dead boy
walking right there.

116
At 00:05:01,701, Character said: (Bryana coughs
and vomits)

117
At 00:05:04,763, Character said: Keep rinsing, Baby Girl!
Keep rinsing.

118
At 00:05:07,999, Character said: Look at this.

119
At 00:05:09,810, Character said: Ugh!

120
At 00:05:11,544, Character said: But you told me
not to touch her.

121
At 00:05:14,631, Character said: You just don't learn,
do you, Jordan?

122
At 00:05:17,217, Character said: You're taking all my gifts?

123
At 00:05:18,760, Character said: I'm going
to take everything,
and when I get done,

124
At 00:05:20,929, Character said: there won't be
nothing else to take,

125
At 00:05:23,223, Character said: except your bone marrow.

126
At 00:05:24,557, Character said: But I didn't touch her!

127
At 00:05:27,602, Character said: (Jordan groans)
Oh!

128
At 00:05:36,569, Character said: Here's your dinner.

129
At 00:05:38,279, Character said: Sorry, Bryana ate
all the sweet potatoes.

130
At 00:05:40,865, Character said: I'll kill her.

131
At 00:05:42,617, Character said: And then you'll
be grounded for
another night.

132
At 00:05:44,887, Character said: Uncle Bernie's already
threatening

133
At 00:05:46,287, Character said: to take away
your Halloween.

134
At 00:05:47,923, Character said: Why do you keep
doing this to yourself?

135
At 00:05:49,332, Character said: I don't know.
I can't help it.

136
At 00:05:51,626, Character said: It's like a movie.

137
At 00:05:53,128, Character said: I see myself going after her
and I can't stop.

138
At 00:05:56,089, Character said: And then the screaming
and hitting...
darkness.

139
At 00:05:59,384, Character said: (scoffs)
Yeah, and then
Uncle Bernie comes.

140
At 00:06:01,678, Character said: No, he is the screaming
and hitting and darkness.

141
At 00:06:04,889, Character said: How do you put up with it?

142
At 00:06:06,599, Character said: Same way
I put up with you.

143...