00:00:10,700 --> 00:00:12,- Yo, what's your rush, Jamal?

00:00:12,333 --> 00:00:14,Compton Leroy's ain't going nowhere.

00:00:14,267 --> 00:00:16,- Look, every time we get there late,

00:00:16,800 --> 00:00:19,they out of the barbecue fatback.

00:00:19,533 --> 00:00:22,It's not gonna happen to me a third time.

00:00:22,067 --> 00:00:24,- You g***t enough fat on your back for a lifetime.

00:00:27,333 --> 00:00:28,- Hoochie hoedown!

00:00:28,367 --> 00:00:29,- Sharkeisha, don't kick her!

00:00:29,933 --> 00:00:31,- Aye, I'm snappin' the first titty that pop out.

00:00:31,633 --> 00:00:33,Worldstar!

00:00:37,933 --> 00:00:41,- Okay, I g***t a full bird with a friends and family plan.

00:00:41,500 --> 00:00:44,Anything else, you sorry Coolio-looking motherfucker?

00:00:44,233 --> 00:00:46,- I ** Coolio, big bitch.

00:00:46,800 --> 00:00:49,- How may I help you, pimpled-a***s short d***k?

00:00:49,367 --> 00:00:51,They make me say stuff like that, Jamal.

00:00:51,433 --> 00:00:53,You know I love your short d***k.

00:00:53,167 --> 00:00:55,- Hmm, I'll have the number one,

00:00:55,500 --> 00:00:59,number two, number three, and a biscuit.

00:00:59,067 --> 00:01:02,Ooh, and some corn bread, with extra fat back,

00:01:02,067 --> 00:01:04,fat front, and a side of fat side.

00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:09,- Aye, since when did Chamberlain Heights

00:01:09,200 --> 00:01:10,get a Metro Rail?

00:01:10,300 --> 00:01:11,- Yeah, I thought the only trains

00:01:11,600 --> 00:01:13,being run around here were on Amtrak Amy.

00:01:16,633 --> 00:01:18,- Isn't this place great?

00:01:18,167 --> 00:01:19,Life just feels more precious here.

00:01:19,800 --> 00:01:23,This is how Lucious Lyon grew up on "Empire."

00:01:24,433 --> 00:01:26,- I feel so vulnerable.

00:01:26,467 --> 00:01:29,Like a wounded gazelle on the Serengeti.

00:01:29,067 --> 00:01:31,This is amazeballs.

00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:36,- What the hell's going on around here?

00:01:36,467 --> 00:01:38,- A juicery? Man, nobody in Chamberlain Heights

00:01:38,633 --> 00:01:40,gonna go somewhere that only serve fruit skeet.

00:01:40,733 --> 00:01:42,- Look at that fatback.

00:01:42,667 --> 00:01:46,I swear everybody here must have diabetes.

00:01:48,067 --> 00:01:49,- This hipster nigga.

00:01:56,500 --> 00:01:57,- Aye, Grover, your neighborhood

00:01:57,967 --> 00:02:00,about to turn into a Cracker Barrel--look.

00:02:02,900 --> 00:02:05,- Ooh, Bohemian Beckys.

00:02:05,267 --> 00:02:07,- That's strange. They don't look like Section 8.

00:02:07,367 --> 00:02:09,- They're not--I know none of you ignorant negroes

00:02:09,300 --> 00:02:12,and Milk asked, but what you're witnessing, gentlemen,

00:02:12,233 --> 00:02:14,is what they call "neighborhood revitalization."

00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:16,That's only because they're afraid to use...

00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:19,The G word. - Gonads?

00:02:19,733 --> 00:02:21,- Gonorrhea? - Django?

00:02:21,400 --> 00:02:24,- Dude, no, I'm talking about gentrification.

00:02:24,067 --> 00:02:26,- My dad says gentrification is a good thing.

00:02:26,300 --> 00:02:27,He's sick of all the black people

00:02:27,567 --> 00:02:29,running around everywhere.

00:02:29,700 --> 00:02:32,I mean, not--not you, Grover. You one of the good ones.

00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:34,- That's because like so many other brothers and sisters,

00:02:34,267 --> 00:02:35,your pops is a sell out.

00:02:35,567 --> 00:02:36,- 'Tis true. 'Tis true.

00:02:36,800 --> 00:02:38,- In addition to appropriating our culture,

00:02:38,367 --> 00:02:41,white people are "discovering" our neighborhoods, as well.

00:02:41,167 --> 00:02:42,- It's not so bad. Look.

00:02:42,767 --> 00:02:45,They even upgraded the shoes on the telephone wire.

00:02:45,100 --> 00:02:47,- Hi, I'm your new neighbor, Kristen.

00:02:47,233 --> 00:02:49,I just wanted to introduce myself

00:02:49,067 --> 00:02:51,and bring you a nice fruit basket.

00:02:51,167 --> 00:02:53,They were out of apples, so I put in a couple of Apple iPads.

00:02:53,700 --> 00:02:56,Nothing special. Only 64 gigs each.

00:02:56,333 --> 00:02:57,Okay, bye!

00:02:57,667 --> 00:02:59,- See, Malik? You was worried about nothing.

00:02:59,467 --> 00:03:02,- Yeah, and the Indians loved blankets in the beginning too.

00:03:02,100 --> 00:03:03,This won't end well.

00:03:04,533 --> 00:03:06,- Huh? What'd you say?

00:03:11,500 --> 00:03:13,- I don't get it. "Art is a***l cheese"?

00:03:13,800 --> 00:03:15,- D***n, these hipsters is deep.

00:03:15,967 --> 00:03:18,- Yeah, amazeballs deep.

00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:22,Check out the beezys putting it on display for no charge.

00:03:22,467 --> 00:03:24,- Yo, I ain't seen this many camel toes

00:03:24,600 --> 00:03:26,since Amber Rose's s***t walk.

00:03:26,833 --> 00:03:28,- Y'all can have them Beckys.

00:03:28,133 --> 00:03:29,What I need with a pale hoochie that's gonna

00:03:29,733 --> 00:03:32,love me, let me drive her dad's car, and give me money?

00:03:32,500 --> 00:03:33,That's what Mom's for.

00:03:39,633 --> 00:03:42,Yo, why the hell they switching fake astronauts?

00:03:42,067 --> 00:03:44,- I don't know, but I ain't mad at Matt Damon, though.

00:03:44,867 --> 00:03:47,He was great in "Fast and the Furious."

00:03:47,533 --> 00:03:49,Rest in peace.

00:03:50,867 --> 00:03:52,- All right, settle down.

00:03:52,933 --> 00:03:55,I'm handing back last week's homework assignment.

00:03:55,967 --> 00:03:58,As you can see, there's been some changes

00:03:58,300 --> 00:04:00,here at the Matt Damon Charter School.

00:04:00,567 --> 00:04:04,In accordance with the new "unschooling" initiative,

00:04:04,067 --> 00:04:06,you will no longer receive grades.

00:04:08,133 --> 00:04:11,In fact, all homework is now optional.

00:04:13,100 --> 00:04:15,All right. Keep it in your pants.

00:04:15,600 --> 00:04:18,And I mean it literally, Milk.

00:04:18,267 --> 00:04:22,Now let's move on to the human sexuality portion of class.

00:04:22,567 --> 00:04:25,Per our new "immersive" curriculum,

00:04:25,067 --> 00:04:29,please welcome our sexperts, Rick and Celeste.

00:04:29,733 --> 00:04:31,For those of you in the front row,

00:04:31,533 --> 00:04:35,under your seats you'll find splash guards and goggles.

00:04:37,067 --> 00:04:38,- So should we start with foreplay,

00:04:38,467 --> 00:04:39,or just go straight to a***l?

00:04:41,233 --> 00:04:43,- D***n, he g***t a sweaty booty.

00:04:49,067 --> 00:04:51,D***n, look at all this new talent walking around.

00:04:53,933 --> 00:04:55,- It ain't polite to point, my nig.

00:04:55,767 --> 00:04:57,- What you talking about? - Yeah, homey,

00:04:57,800 --> 00:04:59,you best holster that six.

00:04:59,267 --> 00:05:01,- D***n, I didn't know I had a progressive p***s.

00:05:01,367 --> 00:05:03,This the kind of d***k Martin Luther King dreamed about.

00:05:03,800 --> 00:05:05,- He wasn't dreaming about dicks.

00:05:05,433 --> 00:05:06,That nig had bitches.

00:05:06,933 --> 00:05:08,- Y'all chopping it up like some babbling beezys

00:05:08,933 --> 00:05:10,and we late for practice.

00:05:10,400 --> 00:05:12,- Ah! S***t! Water!

00:05:12,267 --> 00:05:14,- What the f***k are you motherfuckers doing in the pool?

00:05:14,567 --> 00:05:16,Get the hell out of my God d***n water!

00:05:16,333 --> 00:05:17,- When the hell we get a pool, Coach?

00:05:17,733 --> 00:05:19,You know our people can't swim.

00:05:19,267 --> 00:05:21,- We always had a pool, motherfucker.

00:05:21,100 --> 00:05:23,Part of Reagan's Inner City Sink or Swim Initiative.

00:05:23,333 --> 00:05:26,We just ain't used it since the class of '88 drowned.

00:05:28,733 --> 00:05:30,- So where we supposed to hoop at?

00:05:30,367 --> 00:05:32,- Basketball's been cancelled, motherfucker.

00:05:32,267 --> 00:05:33,It's all about water polo here

00:05:33,933 --> 00:05:35,at the Matt Damon Charter School.

00:05:35,633 --> 00:05:37,Now get the hell out of my water!

00:05:37,233 --> 00:05:39,- I don't know. I kind of like it in here.

00:05:39,933 --> 00:05:42,- Brody's like a beach ball.

00:05:43,233 --> 00:05:45,- Will you stop playing with them white boys?

00:05:45,467 --> 00:05:47,Hold up. Where's Grove?

00:05:50,400 --> 00:05:52,- Grover! Is you dead?

00:05:52,267 --> 00:05:54,- If he is, I get his chain and his headband.

00:05:55,800 --> 00:05:58,- Mmm, tastes like brown sugar.

00:05:58,667 --> 00:06:00,- D***n, homey, is you okay?

00:06:00,533 --> 00:06:02,- You lucky LaDante was...