Birds of a Feather s03e10 Cuckoo Movie Subtitles

00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,I do when you abide.

00:00:41,869 --> 00:00:42,You're up late.

00:00:43,170 --> 00:00:44,Out on the rattle last night, was you?

00:00:45,270 --> 00:00:47,There's only ten pound left in the
housekeeping drawer.

00:00:48,350 --> 00:00:49,Yeah, I know. I've done the shopping.

00:00:49,750 --> 00:00:50,How much did you spend?

00:00:51,430 --> 00:00:52,Seventy quid.

00:00:52,510 --> 00:00:53,Seventy quid?

00:00:53,550 --> 00:00:55,Where do you go shopping? How red's food
all?

00:00:56,130 --> 00:01:00,Seventy quid? What have we g***t? Boiling
the bag caviar and venison burgers, eh?

00:01:01,010 --> 00:01:02,Monk salmon fish fingers this week, is
it?

00:01:03,930 --> 00:01:07,That's what it costs, Trace. No, it
don't. Don't be daft. There's only two

00:01:07,310 --> 00:01:10,us. Blimey, there's old families living
on less than that for a week all in.

00:01:12,559 --> 00:01:14,silly. I just g***t a lot of stuff, that's
all.

00:01:15,360 --> 00:01:17,G***t a lot of eggs. A lot of veg.

00:01:17,400 --> 00:01:18,What eggs did you get? Golden eagles.

00:01:20,200 --> 00:01:22,I g***t a lot of stuff so it'll last.

00:01:22,560 --> 00:01:24,Because I don't like going to the
supermarket.

00:01:25,280 --> 00:01:28,Last time I was there I was stuck in a
queue that made the dole office look

00:01:28,620 --> 00:01:29,the Marie Celeste.

00:01:31,300 --> 00:01:35,And then the checkout girl puts her
hands up for tin of chestnut puree with

00:01:35,340 --> 00:01:38,price on and starts ringing bells like
it's New Year's Eve.

00:01:38,760 --> 00:01:40,I hate that. I hate it.

00:01:42,380 --> 00:01:46,Life is on hold until Dilip Patel finds
out the price of 500 grams.

00:01:47,060 --> 00:01:50,And he's just vanished up the
Californian corn chip hole, never to be

00:01:50,740 --> 00:01:51,again.

00:01:52,060 --> 00:01:55,Probably thought to himself, stuff this
for a game of shopkeepers and legs it

00:01:55,620 --> 00:01:56,back to Bangladesh.

00:01:56,640 --> 00:01:58,And I don't blame him.

00:01:58,680 --> 00:02:01,Dilip Patel don't come from Bangladesh.
He's from Goa.

00:02:02,520 --> 00:02:05,What? Well, actually, he's from Gidia
Park, but his family come from Goa.

00:02:07,440 --> 00:02:08,How do you know?

00:02:08,830 --> 00:02:11,Because I was stuck in that queue once
when they couldn't get the teal roll

00:02:11,610 --> 00:02:12,in the machine.

00:02:12,370 --> 00:02:13,Told me all about himself.

00:02:13,910 --> 00:02:17,He's g***t two kids, drives a Nissan Sunny
with a graphic equaliser.

00:02:18,090 --> 00:02:19,Is he married then?

00:02:20,150 --> 00:02:23,Well, of course he's married. What do
you think, he had two kids all on his

00:02:25,370 --> 00:02:26,He could be divorced.

00:02:28,150 --> 00:02:29,What's his wife's name?

00:02:29,570 --> 00:02:30,How should I know?

00:02:30,830 --> 00:02:34,Look, we are not doing Dilip Patel
supermarket assistant, this is your

00:02:34,670 --> 00:02:35,we?

00:02:35,640 --> 00:02:38,What we're doing is, let's have a go at
Sharon for spending too much money.

00:02:39,540 --> 00:02:42,I know what we're doing, Trace, and
you're well out of order.

00:02:43,140 --> 00:02:46,Look, all this stuff costs money. It
ain't my fault.

00:02:47,640 --> 00:02:49,Oh, no, Cheryl, I'm sorry.

00:02:49,720 --> 00:02:51,It's just we're not going for our money
quick.

00:02:52,660 --> 00:02:53,Are we?

00:02:53,660 --> 00:02:57,Yes. We g***t the bill for the car
insurance yesterday, the central eating

00:02:57,800 --> 00:03:00,had to have it serviced last week, and
the house insurance is due.

00:03:00,940 --> 00:03:03,Honestly, I don't know how Daryl used to
manage it.

00:03:03,560 --> 00:03:04,Of course you do, Trace.

00:03:05,200 --> 00:03:06,It's to knock over banks.

00:03:08,760 --> 00:03:10,It helps to treat with your
housekeeping, that does.

00:03:11,220 --> 00:03:12,Because it don't help us.

00:03:13,140 --> 00:03:16,I'm scared, Cheryl. I was all last night
trying to work out how long our money's

00:03:16,460 --> 00:03:18,going to last us. You know, at the rate
that we're going through it.

00:03:19,180 --> 00:03:19,What's the answer?

00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:21,I don't know.

00:03:21,080 --> 00:03:24,I've been so worried about money, I
hadn't bought a battery for me

00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:27,I was going mental trying to work it out
of a pencil in me fingers.

00:03:28,620 --> 00:03:31,Well, I'm no good at adding up since
everyone g***t calculators.

00:03:31,720 --> 00:03:32,You were so good before.

00:03:33,100 --> 00:03:34,I know.

00:03:34,720 --> 00:03:38,Anyway, I've g***t me building site book
out, you know, to try and work it out.

00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:43,And? Well, when I go to the building
site and they put it in the machine and

00:03:43,080 --> 00:03:44,prints it all out, what's left at the
bottom.

00:03:45,360 --> 00:03:49,Yes. And then they take it out and they
close it to push it under the glass.

00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:51,Yes.

00:03:51,420 --> 00:03:52,Well, I never look at it.

00:03:53,760 --> 00:03:56,Because I'm frightened. You know what
I'm like, Shell.

00:03:56,460 --> 00:03:59,Well, anyway, last night I made myself
look at it.

00:03:59,720 --> 00:04:02,I mean, I came down here first to have a
few vodkas, you know, to get me bottle

00:04:02,840 --> 00:04:05,up. Well, that's why I'm a bit off
today, because I'm a bit hungover.

00:04:06,860 --> 00:04:09,And now there's no vodka left and we
can't afford to replace it.

00:04:11,340 --> 00:04:13,Actually, I think I'll just get myself
an aspirin. Tracy!

00:04:14,040 --> 00:04:15,What?

00:04:15,360 --> 00:04:16,Tell me, I'm hanging on here.

00:04:17,040 --> 00:04:18,Get to the point, how much have we g***t?

00:04:20,500 --> 00:04:21,Oh, give us a ear.

00:04:26,160 --> 00:04:27,Bloody hell.

00:04:30,900 --> 00:04:32,Well, there's still a fair bit in here.

00:04:32,700 --> 00:04:34,But nowhere near how much they should
be.

00:04:34,960 --> 00:04:37,It ain't going to last long at this
rate. I think we're just going to have

00:04:37,680 --> 00:04:38,work for a living.

00:04:38,640 --> 00:04:40,Yeah, steady on, girl. No need to get
carried away.

00:04:42,160 --> 00:04:43,I won't think of something.

00:04:44,600 --> 00:04:45,Let's look at what we've g***t going out.

00:04:46,140 --> 00:04:47,Well, there's one thing going out that
we don't need.

00:04:48,540 --> 00:04:50,What's that? The rent on your place at
Edmonton.

00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:52,Well, we don't have it, Trace. It's my
flat.

00:04:53,160 --> 00:04:54,Yeah, but you live here.

00:04:54,660 --> 00:04:57,I still need my own place, Trace. Not if
you live here, dear.

00:04:59,050 --> 00:05:02,Well, you never go there. You don't like
nothing about it. But still, you shell

00:05:02,030 --> 00:05:05,out for it every week. You're starved. I
don't shell out for it. I mean, when's

00:05:05,750 --> 00:05:08,that Sam was paying rent? He made some
sort of cent.

00:05:08,430 --> 00:05:11,Then now he's in Pentonville, you ain't
getting nothing and you're still paying

00:05:11,570 --> 00:05:12,rent.

00:05:12,830 --> 00:05:15,I ain't paying rent. The DSS are.

00:05:18,050 --> 00:05:20,That's what I'm trying to tell you,
Tracey. Don't cost me nothing.

00:05:21,450 --> 00:05:22,Well, is that legal?

00:05:23,790 --> 00:05:26,Well, you can overdo all this legal
business, can't you?

00:05:28,560 --> 00:05:32,Look, I ain't hurting anyone, ** I?
They'd have to pay the rent anyway.

00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:36,I like being here. You like having me
here.

00:05:37,200 --> 00:05:41,And I'm not taking a job away from some
poor person with hundreds of kids and a

00:05:41,080 --> 00:05:42,terrible mortgage that needs it
desperately.

00:05:44,300 --> 00:05:45,Everyone's happy, isn't they?

00:05:46,080 --> 00:05:47,You're all art, aren't you, Shell?

00:05:48,080 --> 00:05:49,Yeah, I **, yeah.

00:05:49,340 --> 00:05:52,And there was me thinking you was just a
lazy, selfish cow that was trying to

00:05:52,640 --> 00:05:53,make some extra money.

00:05:54,560 --> 00:05:57,It just shows you how wrong you can be,
doesn't it, Tracey? Yeah.

00:05:58,040 --> 00:06:01,I wonder if the DSS would really
appreciate just how public -spirited you

00:06:02,440 --> 00:06:04,Don't say that, Trace. I've g***t to go
there tomorrow.

00:06:07,320 --> 00:06:08,Thank you very much. Goodbye.

00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:14,Mrs Sharon Theodopoulopoulos.

00:06:17,400 --> 00:06:19,Cubicle three, please.

00:06:22,160 --> 00:06:23,Hello. Hello.

00:06:23,620 --> 00:06:25,Have you done any work since you last
signed?

00:06:25,760 --> 00:06:26,Oh, no.

00:06:27,549 --> 00:06:29,You are available and looking for work?

00:06:29,790 --> 00:06:30,Oh, yeah.

00:06:31,170 --> 00:06:34,You just haven't been successful in
finding any.

00:06:34,870 --> 00:06:36,Well, it's the recession, isn't it?

00:06:37,450 --> 00:06:41,And then again, once people find out my
husband's in prison, they turn against

00:06:41,050 --> 00:06:42,me.

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