Bless This House s03e10 Will The Real Sid Abbott Please Stand Up Subtitles

00:00:03,830 --> 00:00:06,VTR 107002, Bless This House, Episode 8,
Part 1, Take 1.

00:01:12,899 --> 00:01:13,Hard luck.

00:01:14,120 --> 00:01:15,You have two pieces.

00:01:15,660 --> 00:01:16,I'm feeding my face.

00:01:17,020 --> 00:01:18,Well, I hope you get fat.

00:01:18,780 --> 00:01:19,Carmen.

00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:21,Hurry up, you two.

00:01:21,320 --> 00:01:24,You know I'm going to visit your
grandma. I want everything cleared away

00:01:24,240 --> 00:01:24,I go.

00:01:24,840 --> 00:01:26,Is it all right if I let my coffee cool
down?

00:01:27,260 --> 00:01:29,Or would you like me to pour it in the
saucer and blow on it?

00:01:29,960 --> 00:01:32,I'll pour it over your head if you don't
watch it.

00:01:34,240 --> 00:01:35,Ali, what's the matter?

00:01:36,020 --> 00:01:37,Are these yours?

00:01:37,120 --> 00:01:38,Well, they're not mine.

00:01:39,260 --> 00:01:40,What's the matter with you?

00:01:41,580 --> 00:01:43,Trespassing. will be prosecuted.

00:01:44,650 --> 00:01:45,They're fun pants.

00:01:46,190 --> 00:01:47,Fun for who?

00:01:47,490 --> 00:01:50,If you think mine are bad, you'll want
to see what some people have written on

00:01:50,410 --> 00:01:53,them. It's not the words I'm worried
about. It's who reads them.

00:01:53,590 --> 00:01:55,Well, half the boys I know can't read at
all.

00:01:55,750 --> 00:01:56,Hey,

00:01:57,470 --> 00:01:58,are you going out tonight?

00:01:58,570 --> 00:01:59,Yeah, we're going to a party.

00:02:00,150 --> 00:02:03,Wash up for me before you go, will you?
I think I'll go and get ready.

00:02:03,230 --> 00:02:04,You can wipe.

00:02:04,270 --> 00:02:05,Thanks a lot.

00:02:05,650 --> 00:02:06,Hey, you haven't finished your dinner.

00:02:07,210 --> 00:02:08,Well, I did have a second helping.

00:02:08,949 --> 00:02:10,There wasn't a second helping.

00:02:10,840 --> 00:02:12,Well, what was all that food on the
plate in the oven?

00:02:13,040 --> 00:02:14,Your father's dinner.

00:02:16,200 --> 00:02:19,I thought he was working late. He is,
but he does like to eat when he comes

00:02:19,840 --> 00:02:22,home. Are you sure he's working late?

00:02:22,920 --> 00:02:23,Of course I **.

00:02:24,160 --> 00:02:25,That's funny.

00:02:25,160 --> 00:02:28,I thought we saw him getting on a bus in
Market Street on the way home.

00:02:28,760 --> 00:02:29,It was definitely Daddy.

00:02:30,180 --> 00:02:31,Are you sure?

00:02:31,280 --> 00:02:33,Yeah, sort of dried up prune wearing a
wire brush.

00:02:34,680 --> 00:02:35,Sorry.

00:02:36,520 --> 00:02:39,Well, it couldn't have been him because
he's working late.

00:02:41,160 --> 00:02:43,Life is easy. You make him whoopee.

00:02:43,460 --> 00:02:44,Now, what does that mean?

00:02:45,140 --> 00:02:50,Nothing. Sally, I trust your father, and
if he says he's working late, then he's

00:02:50,100 --> 00:02:51,working late.

00:02:52,280 --> 00:02:53,Where are you going?

00:02:53,980 --> 00:02:54,Around the office.

00:02:55,880 --> 00:02:57,Just to make sure he is working late.

00:03:04,320 --> 00:03:05,Marshal's office supplies.

00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:06,Abbott speaking.

00:03:06,580 --> 00:03:08,Oh, good. You are working late.

00:03:13,890 --> 00:03:16,This is going to get us nowhere. I told
you that this morning.

00:03:16,450 --> 00:03:17,Yes, I know you did.

00:03:18,050 --> 00:03:19,What are you ringing me up for?

00:03:19,890 --> 00:03:22,Oh, well, it's about your dinner.

00:03:22,810 --> 00:03:24,My dinner? What about it?

00:03:24,490 --> 00:03:25,There isn't any.

00:03:25,690 --> 00:03:26,Mike's eaten it.

00:03:27,970 --> 00:03:28,That's no surprise.

00:03:29,030 --> 00:03:30,And you rang me up just to tell me that.

00:03:31,290 --> 00:03:32,Well, there is something, Al.

00:03:32,930 --> 00:03:35,The kids are going to a party and I'm
going to see my mother.

00:03:35,870 --> 00:03:37,So when you get home, we'll all be out.

00:03:38,010 --> 00:03:39,I see.

00:03:39,170 --> 00:03:41,So Mike's at my dinner and there'll be
nobody at home when I get there.

00:03:42,640 --> 00:03:43,Oh, that's lovely.

00:03:43,820 --> 00:03:46,If you've g***t any more good news, don't
hesitate to phone me again.

00:03:48,120 --> 00:03:49,You all right?

00:03:49,060 --> 00:03:50,Yes. See you later.

00:03:50,600 --> 00:03:52,Hang on. Wait a minute. Here's the kiss.

00:03:54,380 --> 00:03:55,Here's yours.

00:04:02,460 --> 00:04:03,Here's your letter, Sid.

00:04:03,640 --> 00:04:04,Thank you.

00:04:05,780 --> 00:04:07,Anything else you'd like me to take
down?

00:04:07,880 --> 00:04:10,You could get yourself into shocking
trouble, same thing.

00:04:14,190 --> 00:04:15,That's no good. You'll have to do that
again.

00:04:15,790 --> 00:04:16,Why? What's wrong with it?

00:04:16,870 --> 00:04:17,What's wrong with it?

00:04:17,930 --> 00:04:21,Thanking you again for your esteemed
order and hoping you manage to get fully

00:04:21,670 --> 00:04:22,stuffed before the holidays.

00:04:23,510 --> 00:04:27,That doesn't sound right. No, it's not.
The word I dictated was stuffed.

00:04:28,030 --> 00:04:29,Sorry. I'll do it again. Thank you.

00:04:31,190 --> 00:04:32,I'm off now, Sid.

00:04:32,730 --> 00:04:33,No, no.

00:04:33,910 --> 00:04:35,Try and keep your wicked hands off
Sandra.

00:04:36,270 --> 00:04:38,Do me a favour. I'm a happily married
man.

00:04:38,630 --> 00:04:41,She eats happily married men. Does she?

00:04:41,910 --> 00:04:42,Straight up.

00:04:42,860 --> 00:04:44,She fancies you, that's it. You know
why.

00:04:46,480 --> 00:04:47,You think so?

00:04:47,660 --> 00:04:48,Definitely.

00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:52,Well, if you g***t it, you g***t it, haven't
you? And you definitely g***t it.

00:04:53,060 --> 00:04:54,I was Watford.

00:04:54,700 --> 00:04:57,Watford? Yeah, you walked straight past
me in the high street and was with

00:04:57,480 --> 00:04:58,Watford yesterday.

00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:00,No, mate. I wasn't in Watford yesterday.

00:05:01,120 --> 00:05:02,Who was she?

00:05:02,420 --> 00:05:03,Who was who?

00:05:03,500 --> 00:05:04,Dolly Bird.

00:05:04,900 --> 00:05:06,With you on the high street.

00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:09,I keep telling you I wasn't in Watford
yesterday.

00:05:09,460 --> 00:05:11,Oh, no, no. Of course you weren't.

00:05:11,950 --> 00:05:12,Say no more.

00:05:13,170 --> 00:05:14,Then how you doing?

00:05:16,430 --> 00:05:18,Silly old twit. He's round the bend.

00:05:19,090 --> 00:05:20,Here's the letter, sis.

00:05:20,490 --> 00:05:23,Thank you, darling. Right, you might as
well go off now. There's nothing else.

00:05:23,530 --> 00:05:24,I'll just put my face on.

00:05:25,450 --> 00:05:27,I'm hoping you manage to get fully
stiffed.

00:05:30,190 --> 00:05:31,Oh, well, it's near enough, I suppose.

00:05:32,370 --> 00:05:33,Aren't you going home yet?

00:05:34,190 --> 00:05:37,No, I'm not nearly, Harry. There's
nobody at home and there's nothing to

00:05:37,530 --> 00:05:38,What a shame.

00:05:38,710 --> 00:05:40,Yep, looks like the Chinese take away
again.

00:05:41,320 --> 00:05:44,They do a nice grill at the mitre. Do
they?

00:05:44,640 --> 00:05:45,We could go together.

00:05:47,900 --> 00:05:48,Together?

00:05:49,940 --> 00:05:50,The two of us?

00:05:51,080 --> 00:05:52,That's right.

00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:53,Just you and me?

00:05:53,760 --> 00:05:54,Yeah.

00:05:55,520 --> 00:05:56,Sid?

00:06:00,100 --> 00:06:01,Sidney?

00:06:01,420 --> 00:06:03,No, Sidney, no.

00:06:04,180 --> 00:06:06,Remember, you're a married man.

00:06:06,920 --> 00:06:09,Oh, shut up. You heard what Charlie
said. He fancies me.

00:06:10,360 --> 00:06:12,You ought to be ashamed of yourself.

00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:14,I haven't done anything yet.

00:06:15,260 --> 00:06:18,No, but you're thinking about it.

00:06:19,300 --> 00:06:22,Of course I'm thinking about it. Look at
those legs.

00:06:22,440 --> 00:06:23,Cool.

00:06:24,700 --> 00:06:26,Haven't you seen a pair of legs before?

00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:28,Not like that, Mush.

00:06:29,540 --> 00:06:31,Sidney. Belt up.

00:06:31,860 --> 00:06:34,Go on, Sid. Fill your boots. Enjoy
yourself.

00:06:36,440 --> 00:06:38,You know it's wrong, Sidney.

00:06:39,409 --> 00:06:45,And because you're a man of honour and
integrity, that's true, I know you'll

00:06:45,470 --> 00:06:46,reach the right decision.

00:06:47,650 --> 00:06:49,Well, Sid, what are we doing?

00:06:50,330 --> 00:06:51,Give me time to go home and change.

00:06:55,510 --> 00:06:56,Let's take a bottle each, Sal.

00:06:56,970 --> 00:06:58,Roger might have told us it was a bottle
party.

00:06:59,290 --> 00:07:02,Come on, we'll tell Dad. Otherwise he'll
think we're a couple of alcoholics. Is

00:07:02,770 --> 00:07:03,he in?

00:07:03,350 --> 00:07:04,Yeah, he must be. His car's in the
drive.

00:07:05,110 --> 00:07:06,Dad!

00:07:06,270 --> 00:07:07,Dad! Who's...