Bless This House s05e07 Happy Birthday Sid.eng Subtitles

00:00:56,220 --> 00:00:59,Bread, butter, sugar, sweetness.

00:01:02,320 --> 00:01:03,Hello, darling.

00:01:03,420 --> 00:01:04,You been cleaning the car?

00:01:04,780 --> 00:01:06,No, I've just been to Ascot.

00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:10,Well, Mike said he'd clean it for you.

00:01:11,360 --> 00:01:12,Did he?

00:01:12,500 --> 00:01:15,And how ** I going to get the car up
into his bedroom?

00:01:15,840 --> 00:01:18,Oh, darling, he's young. He needs his
rest.

00:01:19,380 --> 00:01:21,He could easily outgrow his strength.

00:01:21,660 --> 00:01:23,Yeah? Oh, he's never up long enough.

00:01:23,781 --> 00:01:28,I'll tell you something, I'll bet you a
pound you won't see him till he's

00:01:28,320 --> 00:01:29,hungry.

00:01:30,260 --> 00:01:31,Mike!

00:01:31,311 --> 00:01:32,Sally!

00:01:32,500 --> 00:01:33,Coming! Coming, Mummy!

00:01:35,160 --> 00:01:36,I'll owe it to you.

00:01:36,900 --> 00:01:43,See you later, I'm off to... So why
aren't you stopping me and nagging me to

00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:44,shopping with you?

00:01:50,960 --> 00:01:52,What is this, the House of Wax?

00:01:52,461 --> 00:01:55,Normally you can't wait for me to take
you shopping so you can spend all my

00:01:55,590 --> 00:01:57,money. I was just thinking.

00:01:57,830 --> 00:01:58,Good.

00:02:00,710 --> 00:02:01,Sid.

00:02:02,350 --> 00:02:04,Yes? I need some more housekeeping.

00:02:05,110 --> 00:02:06,More housekeeping?

00:02:06,290 --> 00:02:08,Yes. I gave you 17 quid last week.

00:02:08,191 --> 00:02:09,That's right.

00:02:09,449 --> 00:02:10,We agreed.

00:02:10,500 --> 00:02:14,The shop stewards, that's you and the
kids, agreed with the management. That's

00:02:14,310 --> 00:02:15,me.

00:02:15,130 --> 00:02:16,17 quid is a very good amount.

00:02:16,551 --> 00:02:17,It is.

00:02:17,610 --> 00:02:19,Good. But this week I need some more.

00:02:20,780 --> 00:02:23,How much did you spend out of last
week's money?

00:02:23,800 --> 00:02:24,£16 .45.

00:02:25,100 --> 00:02:27,There you are. That's a 55p profit in
the week before.

00:02:28,420 --> 00:02:29,£15 .40. There you go.

00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:31,£1 .15 profit.

00:02:31,700 --> 00:02:36,All right, darling. It's up to you. If
you want a £1 .15 birthday present...

00:02:36,740 --> 00:02:37,Pardon?

00:02:39,360 --> 00:02:40,It's your birthday tomorrow.

00:02:42,380 --> 00:02:43,So it is.

00:02:43,431 --> 00:02:45,You want more housekeeping?

00:02:45,620 --> 00:02:46,How much?

00:02:46,671 --> 00:02:48,Oh, no, Sid.

00:02:48,580 --> 00:02:50,I don't want you to know how much.

00:02:50,430 --> 00:02:52,You might guess what the surprise is.

00:02:54,201 --> 00:02:55,Don't look.

00:02:55,990 --> 00:02:59,I wasn't looking. I was just stretching,
that's all. A bit tight.

00:02:59,010 --> 00:03:01,Here. Now, I promise you won't check
your wallet.

00:03:01,310 --> 00:03:02,Of course not. You know me.

00:03:03,090 --> 00:03:04,Exactly.

00:03:04,141 --> 00:03:05,Good morning, Daddy.

00:03:05,650 --> 00:03:08,Morning. Are you ready, Mummy? Oh, just
a minute, dear.

00:03:08,361 --> 00:03:12,Daddy? Yes? I was wondering if you,
um... Could you let you have some more

00:03:12,230 --> 00:03:12,pocket money?

00:03:12,850 --> 00:03:13,Oh, yes, please.

00:03:13,730 --> 00:03:14,Me too?

00:03:14,490 --> 00:03:15,Yes, for this week.

00:03:15,541 --> 00:03:19,How come you're not telling us we're up
early because it's only 12 o 'clock? Oh,

00:03:19,010 --> 00:03:21,blimey, why should I say that? You're
young, you need your rest. How much?

00:03:21,630 --> 00:03:24,If you don't mind, Daddy, we'd rather
you didn't know. It's supposed to be a

00:03:24,410 --> 00:03:25,surprise.

00:03:25,461 --> 00:03:29,I hope it's a better surprise than last
year. I gave him a tenner, she gave me

00:03:29,170 --> 00:03:31,three handkerchiefs, he gave me a pair
of brown socks.

00:03:31,670 --> 00:03:32,Thank you.

00:03:34,290 --> 00:03:38,Incidentally, out of last year's tenner,
what did you spend the other £9 .50 on?

00:03:39,070 --> 00:03:40,Mummy's present.

00:03:40,590 --> 00:03:41,I see.

00:03:45,450 --> 00:03:47,Hang on, hang on just a minute. Come
here.

00:03:54,690 --> 00:03:56,There you are. Thank you, darling.

00:03:56,450 --> 00:03:58,You owe me £1 .50 for services.

00:03:59,810 --> 00:04:00,No chance.

00:04:01,430 --> 00:04:03,No checking your wallet, Daddy. It's a
surprise.

00:04:04,290 --> 00:04:06,Well, of course not. You can trust your
father.

00:04:06,830 --> 00:04:10,Darling, if you're going to the pub now,
we'll give you a lift in the car.

00:04:10,630 --> 00:04:11,A lift?

00:04:12,150 --> 00:04:14,I'm having the car. That's why I cleaned
it.

00:04:14,261 --> 00:04:15,you're not.

00:04:15,730 --> 00:04:18,Your surprise is much too bulky for us
to carry it around.

00:04:20,529 --> 00:04:21,Is it?

00:04:22,750 --> 00:04:23,No.

00:04:27,390 --> 00:04:29,Oh, blimey, that's double eight, too.

00:04:32,230 --> 00:04:33,Aye, aye.

00:04:33,430 --> 00:04:36,Here he is, the birthday boy. All
together, lads.

00:04:36,910 --> 00:04:39,Happy birthday to you.

00:04:40,270 --> 00:04:41,It's not till tomorrow.

00:04:41,750 --> 00:04:42,Hang on, Sid.

00:04:42,851 --> 00:04:46,How about a birthday drink, then? I told
you it's not till tomorrow. Give me the

00:04:46,390 --> 00:04:49,scotch. Ah, yeah, but you never come in
on a Sunday, do you? You're too busy

00:04:49,370 --> 00:04:52,gardening. We'll have ours now, thank
you very much. Give him six pints of

00:04:52,610 --> 00:04:53,bitter. Bitter?

00:04:54,230 --> 00:04:57,We can't have bitter not on your
birthday, see.

00:04:57,430 --> 00:04:58,I'll have a whisky, please, Ben.

00:04:59,361 --> 00:05:01,Scotch for me.

00:05:01,290 --> 00:05:02,Scotch? Scotch.

00:05:02,341 --> 00:05:05,Brandy for me. And a brandy, right?
Scotch for everybody and a brandy for

00:05:05,790 --> 00:05:09,several. Thank you very much. Thank God
birthdays are only once a year.

00:05:14,510 --> 00:05:15,20 quid here.

00:05:15,690 --> 00:05:16,Ten minutes ago.

00:05:17,930 --> 00:05:20,That present had better be a bloody big
one. I've done it.

00:05:21,110 --> 00:05:22,One scotch. Thank you.

00:05:22,910 --> 00:05:24,Happy birthday, Steve. Hang on.

00:05:24,671 --> 00:05:26,When's your birthday?

00:05:26,070 --> 00:05:27,April. Is it?

00:05:27,690 --> 00:05:31,We celebrate yours now. We'll have mine
in April. Make them large ones.

00:05:35,970 --> 00:05:38,Now this will be heard.

00:05:38,450 --> 00:05:40,Oh, look at all that blood.

00:05:40,411 --> 00:05:42,You've g***t to have some. Don't help
yourself.

00:05:42,940 --> 00:05:46,When you take a vital bit of a human and
you stick it on a monster... How dare

00:05:46,760 --> 00:05:48,you talk like that in front of your
mother?

00:05:49,700 --> 00:05:50,He's right, Sid.

00:05:50,940 --> 00:05:53,You can't make an omelette without
breaking the eggs.

00:05:55,700 --> 00:05:57,Omelette? He's drinking the blood!

00:05:58,480 --> 00:06:00,It's not blood, it's tomato sauce.

00:06:01,140 --> 00:06:02,I'll give it. What is it?

00:06:03,920 --> 00:06:08,It's Frankenstein's laboratory and it's
in his castle. I'm not talking about

00:06:08,040 --> 00:06:09,that load of rubbish.

00:06:09,580 --> 00:06:12,I'm talking about my birthday present.
Where is it and what is it?

00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:14,Be quiet. You're spoiling the film.

00:06:15,220 --> 00:06:17,You're joking. They spoiled that when I
made it.

00:06:22,561 --> 00:06:24,What's wrong with that?

00:06:24,860 --> 00:06:26,He's going to stab her with his scalpel.

00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:30,The blade is rubber and the handle is
plastic.

00:06:31,900 --> 00:06:33,I will not shush.

00:06:33,620 --> 00:06:36,Now, two minutes past twelve and I'm the
birthday boy.

00:06:37,820 --> 00:06:39,I just said I'm the birthday boy.

00:06:41,240 --> 00:06:42,Happy birthday to me.

00:06:43,280 --> 00:06:44,Happy birthday to me.

00:06:44,880 --> 00:06:49,Happy birthday, dear Sidney. Happy
birthday to you. There you are, now

00:06:52,020 --> 00:06:53,Do you mind, Daddy?

00:06:53,521 --> 00:06:56,Come on, Dad, cool it. Get out of the
way. Oh, Sidney, I bet you're ruining

00:06:56,920 --> 00:07:03,film. And if you want to know where all
that rain's coming from, it's six

00:07:03,820 --> 00:07:07,old firemen from the Tutney Brigade
having a quick sprinkle with their

00:07:09,771...