The Goldbergs - 03x19 (2013) Subtitles

At 00:00:00,047, Character said: Nothing feels more
magical than first love.

2
At 00:00:03,219, Character said: As a kid, you fall so
hard and feel so much,

3
At 00:00:06,070, Character said: it makes the first breakup
that much more painful.

4
At 00:00:08,891, Character said: It had been months since Dana and I split,

5
At 00:00:11,127, Character said: and I decided it was time to move on.

6
At 00:00:13,612, Character said: Thankfully, my big bro was there to help.

7
At 00:00:16,133, Character said: Dude, what are you doing?

8
At 00:00:17,451, Character said: Feathering my hair like famed
Lady Killer Robert Lowe.

9
At 00:00:20,133, Character said: No. Watch and learn.

10
At 00:00:26,629, Character said: Now that's what the ladies like.

11
At 00:00:28,698, Character said: It looks super wet but somehow
it's dry and crispy.

12
At 00:00:31,918, Character said: Even though I decided
against the flammable helmet head,

13
At 00:00:34,554, Character said: I was starting to feel
like I was back on my game.

14
At 00:00:36,789, Character said: And what do you know, girls
were checking me out.

15
At 00:00:39,141, Character said: A lot! Like, too much.

16
At 00:00:41,527, Character said: Almost as if they weren't
even looking at me...

17
At 00:00:43,079, Character said: Ah, d***n it!

18
At 00:00:44,484, Character said: Stupid handsome Ben.

19
At 00:00:46,029, Character said: Can you walk somewhere else?

20
At 00:00:48,081, Character said: Sure thing, Pal.

21
At 00:00:49,570, Character said: Finding a new Dana was gonna be tough,

22
At 00:00:51,288, Character said: so I turned to my sister's poster gallery

23
At 00:00:53,507, Character said: of beloved '80s heartthrobs
for inspiration.

24
At 00:00:55,909, Character said: Such kind eyes. Is that the trick?

25
At 00:00:58,345, Character said: And then reality hit me.

26
At 00:01:00,930, Character said: What are you doing to my Donnie?!

27
At 00:01:02,790, Character said: These bros get all the girls.

28
At 00:01:04,558, Character said: Now that Dana and I broke up,

29
At 00:01:06,310, Character said: I've g***t to learn their secrets.

30
At 00:01:07,914, Character said: Well, for starters,
they don't have wonky voices,

31
At 00:01:10,132, Character said: and they don't cry at "The Muppet Movie".

32
At 00:01:12,034, Character said: If "Rainbow Connection"
doesn't move you to tears,

33
At 00:01:14,398, Character said: then you're not alive.

34
At 00:01:15,588, Character said: What happened?

35
At 00:01:17,016, Character said: It... it's like I'm totally
invisible to girls.

36
At 00:01:19,319, Character said: At this rate, I'll never get another Dana.

37
At 00:01:21,595, Character said: Dude, getting girls is easy.

38
At 00:01:23,588, Character said: You don't know anything about girls.

39
At 00:01:24,931, Character said: All you need is a hook...

40
At 00:01:26,380, Character said: Something that makes you stand out.

41
At 00:01:28,006, Character said: Yeah? And what's your hook?

42
At 00:01:30,866, Character said: Turtlenecks.

43
At 00:01:32,382, Character said: S***y and comfortable.

44
At 00:01:34,167, Character said: Still upset about Dana, huh?

45
At 00:01:35,535, Character said: Lucky for you, I actually know
a girl who's super into you.

46
At 00:01:38,453, Character said: Really?

47
At 00:01:39,239, Character said: Mom, Adam's feeling unloved!

48
At 00:01:40,978, Character said: Wait, what?

49
At 00:01:43,092, Character said: Is my baby sad?

50
At 00:01:44,196, Character said: Well, look out, 'cause the cuddle
coyote is stalking you!

51
At 00:01:47,630, Character said: Why? Stay out of my room.

52
At 00:01:49,343, Character said: I'm coming for snuggies.

53
At 00:02:00,243, Character said: Synced and corrected by Nest0r
www.addic7ed.com

54
At 00:02:08,367, Character said: It was March 23, 1980-something

55
At 00:02:10,423, Character said: and Barry was planning for his future

56
At 00:02:12,126, Character said: by watching the ambassador
of the wealthy... Robin Leach.

57
At 00:02:15,011, Character said: Hey.

58
At 00:02:16,043, Character said: Robin leach was about to explain
why I need a wine Butler.

59
At 00:02:18,689, Character said: Too bad. You're supposed
to be studying for the PSAT!

60
At 00:02:21,666, Character said: And I finished.

61
At 00:02:22,975, Character said: I did every practice
exam in the whole book.

62
At 00:02:25,251, Character said: Oh, is that right? Explain this.

63
At 00:02:27,392, Character said: The correct answers just happened to form

64
At 00:02:29,080, Character said: the Van Halen logo.

65
At 00:02:30,094, Character said: And a dog?

66
At 00:02:31,179, Character said: Woof.

67
At 00:02:31,679, Character said: A peace sign.

68
At 00:02:33,214, Character said: Pac-man. I love that game.

69
At 00:02:34,734, Character said: And some hideous googly-eyed monster.

70
At 00:02:36,634, Character said: Well, that's actually you.

71
At 00:02:37,906, Character said: Well, I'm putting this on the fridge,

72
At 00:02:39,375, Character said: but I'm still enraged.

73
At 00:02:40,510, Character said: Let's just nip this
conversation in the butt.

74
At 00:02:43,297, Character said: Tests just aren't for me.

75
At 00:02:45,085, Character said: When it came to college, my dad
did what he never did...

76
At 00:02:48,438, Character said: Get involved.

77
At 00:02:49,571, Character said: Moron!

78
At 00:02:50,742, Character said: You're gonna throw your whole
life away like a moron, moron?

79
At 00:02:53,969, Character said: Wait!

80
At 00:02:54,766, Character said: Did you just actually abandon your chair

81
At 00:02:56,985, Character said: and TV to get involved?

82
At 00:02:58,153, Character said: Look, you're gonna prepare for that test.

83
At 00:03:00,742, Character said: Your whole d***n future depends on it.

84
At 00:03:02,944, Character said: Don't worry about my future.

85
At 00:03:04,863, Character said: Trust me, I have
a million awesome options.

86
At 00:03:06,748, Character said: I don't want to hear your options.

87
At 00:03:08,048, Character said: NBA superstar power forward,

88
At 00:03:09,701, Character said: professional ninja, successful Eskimo,

89
At 00:03:12,253, Character said: A.K.A. Success-kimo,

90
At 00:03:13,742, Character said: and as a fallback,
billionaire entrepreneur.

91
At 00:03:16,111, Character said: Spell "entrepreneur."

92
At 00:03:17,245, Character said: "A"... get in the car!

93
At 00:03:25,120, Character said: Hey, this isn't the zoo.

94
At 00:03:26,588, Character said: You're taking a PSAT prep course.

95
At 00:03:29,243, Character said: Out!

96
At 00:03:30,617, Character said: Hello, and what educational stretches

97
At 00:03:33,128, Character said: are we looking to strengthen today?

98
At 00:03:35,212, Character said: Actually, I won't waste your time.

99
At 00:03:37,099, Character said: I'll just wait here and make small talk

100
At 00:03:38,806, Character said: until my dad circles around the block

101
At 00:03:40,531, Character said: to make sure I didn't bail.

102
At 00:03:41,889, Character said: After that, I'm out.

103
At 00:03:43,476, Character said: Are you sure that...

104
At 00:03:44,189, Character said: Bup-bup!

105
At 00:03:45,808, Character said: He's taking a lap to check in on me,

106
At 00:03:48,476, Character said: a-a-a-a-and...

107
At 00:03:49,895, Character said: S***k it.

108
At 00:03:51,703, Character said: As Barry was ditching the class,

109
At 00:03:53,365, Character said: I was facing the sad reality

110
At 00:03:55,033, Character said: that I'd never find a girl like Dana.

111
At 00:03:57,319, Character said: Poor kid.

112
At 00:03:58,537, Character said: H-he's been a wreck
since he broke up with Dana.

113
At 00:04:00,956, Character said: I know. It breaks my heart
to see him like this.

114
At 00:04:03,074, Character said: Past two years, all he's cared
about is a girl.

115
At 00:04:06,161, Character said: But now I've g***t my snuggle muffin back.

116
At 00:04:08,602, Character said: Yeah, you really sound torn up about it.

117
At 00:04:10,520, Character said: I'm just saying it'll be nice

118
At 00:04:12,523, Character said: to finally spend some time with him again.

119
At 00:04:15,305, Character said: 'Cause the fact is,

120
At 00:04:16,493, Character said: nothing heals a broken heart
faster than mom time.

121
At 00:04:19,767, Character said: Did you say faster or weirder?

122
At 00:04:22,043, Character said: Ooh! It's on. It's on.

123
At 00:04:23,652, Character said: Kiddo, come watch with us!

124
At 00:04:25,477, Character said: This is history in the making.

125
At 00:04:27,542, Character said: David Copperfield is gonna walk

126
At 00:04:29,318, Character said: through the Great Wall of China.

127
At 00:04:30,962, Character said: Long before David Blaine,

128
At 00:04:32,320, Character said: we had the original rock star magician,

129
At 00:04:34,618, Character said: David Copperfield.

130
At 00:04:36,143, Character said: His mind-blowing tricks
were truly event TV.

131
At 00:04:39,025, Character said: Levitating over the grand
canyon is one thing,

132
At 00:04:41,852, Character said: but this is just plain crazy.

133
At 00:04:44,009, Character said: There is no magic in this world.
Love is dead.

134
At 00:04:47,539, Character said: But I'll watch 'cause I'm so alone.

135
At 00:04:49,224, Character said: Yay.

136
At 00:04:51,944, Character said: Oh, no, he's flatlining!

137
At 00:04:54,797, Character said: Go back, David!

138
At 00:04:56,098, Character said: It's not worth it!

139
At 00:04:57,383, Character said: Oh, Mr. and Mrs. Copperfield
must be beside themselves!

140
At 00:05:00,036, Character said: You do know that walking
through a solid wall

141...