Faithless s02e03 February.eng Subtitles

00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,Our "Uncle Cormac" lives with us.
He sleeps with Bawbaw in his bed.

00:00:04,000 --> 00:00:04,Astonishing!

00:00:05,040 --> 00:00:07,- You didn't tell him to shut up once!
- Shut up, Mark.

00:00:07,600 --> 00:00:09,Definitely not able
for Cormac shite today.

00:00:10,040 --> 00:00:13,- I'm Bear, Tara.
- He's Bear.

00:00:13,280 --> 00:00:15,- A pint of Guinness?
- "Trashy Amin"?

00:00:15,560 --> 00:00:17,- Fancy a pint?
- Way too soon.

00:00:27,080 --> 00:00:31,- Yeah, but like, what type of a dress?
- I don't know, Lina, just... a dress.

00:00:31,520 --> 00:00:34,Like... a dress-dress?

00:00:35,040 --> 00:00:37,Or like a dress-to-impress?

00:00:37,760 --> 00:00:39,- I'm messing! Oh, my God.
- NANCY: Help!

00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:41,I'll leave some on your bed.

00:00:42,720 --> 00:00:45,Nancy's stuck in the toilet, again!

00:00:45,480 --> 00:00:47,Can someone please fix this door?

00:00:48,280 --> 00:00:50,- I hate this house!
- (DOOR SLAMS)

00:00:52,280 --> 00:00:55,- So, Bawbaw, Valentine's...
- What is with Layla?

00:00:55,760 --> 00:00:58,I don't know.
She wants a dress for the disco.

00:00:58,560 --> 00:01:01,Like a... dress-dress?

00:01:01,680 --> 00:01:04,See, Valentine's gifts, brah.

00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:08,(SAM LAUGHS) That's a lot of chocolate!

00:01:08,240 --> 00:01:10,Yeah, well, what can I say?

00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:13,Bear likes sweet things!

00:01:13,560 --> 00:01:15,And I've nothing for Miss Malone.

00:01:16,520 --> 00:01:18,Do you really need a gift
for your teacher?

00:01:18,520 --> 00:01:21,- Yes.
- Is that not a little bit sucky?

00:01:21,280 --> 00:01:25,No, I need a gift.
And please write the card.

00:01:25,400 --> 00:01:29,- She'll know my handwriting.
- Grab some from Lina's bag!

00:01:29,320 --> 00:01:32,Go on! Bear's g***t, like,
ten boxes of chocolate in there.

00:01:32,720 --> 00:01:35,If it was me, I wouldn't mind giving
Miss Malone one, right?

00:01:35,800 --> 00:01:39,- Quickly, put them in your bag!
- (KNOCK ON DOOR)

00:01:39,240 --> 00:01:43,Ustaz Lovey-Loverson!
Excited for the big boys' night tonight?

00:01:43,320 --> 00:01:47,Only schoolgirls and morons get excited
about Valentine's.

00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:49,? It's here!
The greatest day of the year! ?

00:01:49,920 --> 00:01:52,- Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!
- Exhibit A.

00:01:52,360 --> 00:01:54,- Happy Valentine's Day, Uncle Cormac.
- (CLICKS HIS TONGUE)

00:01:54,960 --> 00:01:56,(CLICKS HER TONGUE)

00:01:56,760 --> 00:02:00,You may go to the ball because
the guest list for The Vault is sorted.

00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:03,- Do me!
- And you shall go to the ball, dearest.

00:02:03,560 --> 00:02:06,- Dymphna's boxed off to babysit, too.
- Yes, pal.

00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:09,- This one, Bawbaw?
- Yeah, yummy. Yum, yum, yum.

00:02:09,200 --> 00:02:11,That there are my favourite. And here...

00:02:11,560 --> 00:02:13,Go!

00:02:13,160 --> 00:02:16,ZEIN: Those lucky ladies, man.
It's been a while!

00:02:16,960 --> 00:02:19,- I'm so excited.
- Why? When was the last time you had s***x?

00:02:19,800 --> 00:02:22,With someone? Four months, 11 days.

00:02:22,760 --> 00:02:24,Jeez, I'm so sorry, pal.

00:02:25,680 --> 00:02:27,- Are you OK?
- Yeah.

00:02:27,200 --> 00:02:29,Are you two OK? Seriously.

00:02:31,800 --> 00:02:33,We're not all sexless like you, Sam!

00:02:33,960 --> 00:02:36,CORMAC: Please don't purge people's
healthy sexual energy, Sam.

00:02:37,040 --> 00:02:39,It's very toxic, pal.
You're a bit anti-s***x.

00:02:39,520 --> 00:02:43,I'm not anti-s***x.
And I don't purge people's sexual energy!

00:02:43,600 --> 00:02:47,Yeah, you do.
You're like the Sexorcist.

00:02:47,560 --> 00:02:49,Don't worry, Zein. It's Valentine's.

00:02:49,560 --> 00:02:52,- Women are desperate for love.
- Desperado.

00:02:52,600 --> 00:02:56,Yeah, yeah. They're desperados?
You two are desperate.

00:02:56,240 --> 00:02:58,- Stay back.
- You stay back.

00:03:00,240 --> 00:03:02,Poo kite!

00:03:02,920 --> 00:03:05,Anime club. Art Attack.

00:03:05,480 --> 00:03:08,- Basketball, coding, drama.
- Poo kite!

00:03:08,440 --> 00:03:11,And, er... What else? Jujitsu.

00:03:12,040 --> 00:03:14,SAM: Jesus, Clive. You memorise them
in alphabetical order?

00:03:14,760 --> 00:03:17,- Poo kite!
- Good lad. Here, eat this.

00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:24,- And he's starting Mandarin.
- Really? Him?

00:03:26,080 --> 00:03:29,- MISS MALONE: Excuse me, Mr Amin. May I?
- See you later, Clive.

00:03:31,880 --> 00:03:34,- Looked like you needed saving.
- Thank you, thank you.

00:03:34,680 --> 00:03:36,Con's learning Mandarin.

00:03:36,560 --> 00:03:38,MISS MALONE: Learning how to eat
a mandarin might be more useful.

00:03:39,040 --> 00:03:41,(LAUGHS) You're very funny.

00:03:41,200 --> 00:03:45,Thank you. No other compliments
for a girl on Valentine's Day?

00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:49,Well, you've a very tiny symmetrical face

00:03:49,440 --> 00:03:54,and your hair looks very smooth
and resistant to static electricity.

00:03:54,280 --> 00:03:57,- Sorry.
- (LAUGHING) OK! Oh, Sam.

00:03:57,120 --> 00:04:00,My bestie, Ciara's, down from Derry
and, well, we're both single...

00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:03,- Really?
- Yeah, I know, shocking!

00:04:03,680 --> 00:04:06,Anyway, I don't really know the city

00:04:06,560 --> 00:04:11,and I've no friends here and she loves
cocktails and it's Valentine's...

00:04:11,320 --> 00:04:13,- Are you asking me...?
- Yeah.

00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:16,Would you and your Cormac know
of a nice wee club?

00:04:16,480 --> 00:04:20,- Somewhere where you and your friends go?
- We're going to The Vault tonight.

00:04:20,520 --> 00:04:23,- Oh, class. Maybe see you there?
- Yeah.

00:04:24,040 --> 00:04:25,It doesn't matter we're not gay
or anything does it?

00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:28,I wouldn't think so, no.

00:04:28,200 --> 00:04:31,- OK.
- Poo kite!

00:04:33,320 --> 00:04:34,Mandarin?

00:04:34,520 --> 00:04:37,As if China doesn't have enough problems.
I'll see you later.

00:04:49,480 --> 00:04:51,(PHONE RINGING)

00:04:52,880 --> 00:04:54,Bear, I said I'd call her back.

00:04:54,840 --> 00:04:57,Don't worry about her. She is jealous.

00:04:58,400 --> 00:05:02,She knows it's Valentine's and she's
calling you. I mean, come on, Lina.

00:05:02,480 --> 00:05:04,We're best friends.

00:05:04,280 --> 00:05:06,I'm your best friend!

00:05:08,720 --> 00:05:13,Listen, I do love my jumper,
but you know...

00:05:14,200 --> 00:05:18,...personally, I could never endorse
those capitalists by buying their wares.

00:05:20,080 --> 00:05:23,I... I don't either. I only bought it
because I thought you'd like it.

00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:29,- Ah, f***k! I sound ungrateful now.
- Stop, no, you don't.

00:05:29,600 --> 00:05:31,It's how they get you, though, right?

00:05:32,240 --> 00:05:35,Seduce you with Christmas or Valentine's.

00:05:36,080 --> 00:05:38,Erupting all your emotions

00:05:38,760 --> 00:05:40,so you're left standing there,

00:05:40,960 --> 00:05:43,sipping spiced lattes.

00:05:45,080 --> 00:05:47,Those little Guatemalan children.

00:05:49,240 --> 00:05:50,The poor fuckers.

00:05:52,680 --> 00:05:55,CHLOE: Right, so that's it?
Off we go, guys.

00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:07,Eoin, this character Vince's job.

00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:11,Like what actually is
an "augmented reality journey builder"?

00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:16,Well, he designs the experience.
You know, bringing the AR scenes to life.

00:06:16,480 --> 00:06:18,Right, yeah. W... Where?

00:06:19,080 --> 00:06:21,- Online.
- On the internet?

00:06:21,760 --> 00:06:24,No. (LAUGHING) No, not on the internet.

00:06:25,040 --> 00:06:29,Look, augmented reality is superimposing
computer generated objects.

00:06:29,440 --> 00:06:31,So that when look at your phone,

00:06:31,920 --> 00:06:34,it feels like you're actually
looking at these objects.

00:06:34,200 --> 00:06:37,In real?
You think I'm a f***g eejit, don't you?

00:06:38,400 --> 00:06:40,No, no. My dad's much worse.

00:06:40,920 --> 00:06:43,Still pronounces the Ls in "tortillas".

00:06:43,800 --> 00:06:46,- Like your jeans.
- They're crops.

00:06:48,760 --> 00:06:52,"The internet?" F***g knob!

00:06:54,720 --> 00:06:56,- I don't think I'll bother with tonight.
- No?

00:06:57,040 --> 00:06:59,Yeah, I'm tired
and I've nothing to wear anyway.

00:06:59,960 --> 00:07:03,Borrow something from Lina.
She has like the best drip ever.

00:07:03,320 --> 00:07:06,Well, she doesn't wear one of these.
Nothing goes with it, ever.

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