Poker Face -ion10 S01E05 Subtitles

At 00:00:06,214, Character said: MAN:
Two, three, four...

2
At 00:00:07,465, Character said: (Jackie Shane's
"Any Other Way" playing)

3
At 00:00:19,060, Character said: {\an8}* Here you come again *

4
At 00:00:23,565, Character said: {\an8}* And you say
that you're my friend *

5
At 00:00:28,278, Character said: * But I know why you're here *

6
At 00:00:32,449, Character said: * She wants to know
how I feel *

7
At 00:00:37,787, Character said: {\an8}* Tell her that I ** happy *

8
At 00:00:42,250, Character said: {\an8}* Tell her that I ** gay *

9
At 00:00:46,379, Character said: {\an8}* Tell her
I wouldn't have it *

10
At 00:00:51,259, Character said: {\an8}* Any other way *

11
At 00:00:53,011, Character said: * *

12
At 00:01:02,979, Character said: {\an8}* People have been talking *

13
At 00:01:07,609, Character said: {\an8}Woman:
No, tha-tha-that's just,
that's ridiculous.

14
At 00:01:10,820, Character said: {\an8}Woman 2:
I'm telling you,
it's a planet again.

15
At 00:01:14,074, Character said: {\an8}Pluto was always
a planet.

16
At 00:01:15,992, Character said: {\an8}No, it wasn't.
Now it is again.

17
At 00:01:19,454, Character said: This is like when you
tried to tell me

18
At 00:01:20,955, Character said: a strawberry is a nut.

19
At 00:01:22,207, Character said: {\an8}- Strawberry is a nut.
- Irene: No.

20
At 00:01:23,458, Character said: {\an8}Anything with seeds
on the outside is a nut?

21
At 00:01:25,960, Character said: - A raspberry?
- A nut.

22
At 00:01:28,922, Character said: I hate your c***t heart.

23
At 00:01:31,132, Character said: (beeping)

24
At 00:01:32,884, Character said: - My tots are done.
- Oh, whoopie.

25
At 00:01:35,303, Character said: {\an8}So, what are we going
to watch tonight?

26
At 00:01:37,347, Character said: {\an8}You want to keep going
with "Euphorica"?

27
At 00:01:39,849, Character said: {\an8}Kids who think they invented
f***g? No, thank you.

28
At 00:01:43,144, Character said: Oh s***t. Goddamn Fletchers
have the remote.

29
At 00:01:45,939, Character said: {\an8}Joyce: Hey, Fletchers.
We're gonna watch "Shark Tank."

30
At 00:01:48,525, Character said: {\an8}Majority rules
the remote.

31
At 00:01:51,486, Character said: {\an8}Majority rules
my foot up your a***s.

32
At 00:01:54,197, Character said: What is this garbage?

33
At 00:01:55,490, Character said: Joyce: So you finish
"Quaintsfordshire Murders"

34
At 00:01:57,492, Character said: and now you want us to care
about who dies in Norway?

35
At 00:02:00,328, Character said: - Fletchers: Shh!
- Irene: The blonde did it.

36
At 00:02:03,289, Character said: - Bitches.
- (Joyce cackles)

37
At 00:02:09,129, Character said: {\an8}Ooh, Irene, did you charge
your heartcuff?

38
At 00:02:12,173, Character said: I sure did, Billy.

39
At 00:02:16,094, Character said: That's hilarious
because, um, I'm showing:

40
At 00:02:18,179, Character said: Irene. Zero percent.
No transmission.

41
At 00:02:21,099, Character said: Oh, you want to track
my every movement,

42
At 00:02:23,393, Character said: so you know every time
I go to the bathroom

43
At 00:02:25,645, Character said: so you can jerk it
to the knowledge

44
At 00:02:27,731, Character said: that I'm pooping.

45
At 00:02:28,982, Character said: It's not a GPS, Irene,

46
At 00:02:30,108, Character said: all it does is track
your vital signs.

47
At 00:02:31,359, Character said: Not gonna chip me
like some dog.

48
At 00:02:33,737, Character said: Woof!

49
At 00:02:34,779, Character said: {\an8}(Joyce laughing)

50
At 00:02:37,157, Character said: {\an8}Betty:
Last chance.

51
At 00:02:38,616, Character said: {\an8}Last chance to sign up
for the zoo trip.

52
At 00:02:41,369, Character said: {\an8}Oh, sure. Great.

53
At 00:02:44,372, Character said: {\an8}(gasps)
Oh, wait, though.

54
At 00:02:46,875, Character said: Will we get back in time
to change our diapers

55
At 00:02:49,377, Character said: and to watch "Teletubbies"?

56
At 00:02:51,963, Character said: {\an8}We're not
fuckin' toddlers, Betty.

57
At 00:02:54,507, Character said: {\an8}We've seen emus before.

58
At 00:02:56,217, Character said: Betty:
If you can't
make an effort

59
At 00:02:57,552, Character said: to be a more positive
community presence,

60
At 00:02:59,971, Character said: I may have to report

61
At 00:03:02,349, Character said: your illegal drug plants
to the administration.

62
At 00:03:05,352, Character said: - (Irene gasps)
- No, no, no, no.

63
At 00:03:06,561, Character said: - No, no, no.
- Our life-saving medicine.

64
At 00:03:09,314, Character said: I know you
don't have glaucoma.

65
At 00:03:11,149, Character said: And I, and I hate this

66
At 00:03:13,068, Character said: witchy Chinese game
you're playing.

67
At 00:03:15,070, Character said: What are these, runes?

68
At 00:03:16,279, Character said: That's right, Betty.

69
At 00:03:17,405, Character said: We're Satanists
who love drugs.

70
At 00:03:21,076, Character said: {\an8}(Betty sighs)

71
At 00:03:24,287, Character said: What a f***g cop.

72
At 00:03:29,918, Character said: (muffled):
Alright now.

73
At 00:03:31,169, Character said: So we have you
on our third floor.

74
At 00:03:33,088, Character said: That's our
medical care unit.

75
At 00:03:35,256, Character said: I can give you a full tour
of the facilities.

76
At 00:03:38,093, Character said: (clearly):
And get you set up on
our heartcuff system.

77
At 00:03:40,595, Character said: But I'll let you
get settled in first.

78
At 00:03:44,099, Character said: (door closes)

79
At 00:03:57,445, Character said: You thinkin'
what I'm thinkin'?

80
At 00:04:04,077, Character said: We have to kill
that motherfucker.

81
At 00:04:06,788, Character said: * Jackie Shane's
"Comin' Down" playing *

82
At 00:04:08,289, Character said: * Comin' down *

83
At 00:04:11,793, Character said: * Comin' down *

84
At 00:04:15,213, Character said: * Comin' down *

85
At 00:04:18,466, Character said: * Yes, I'm comin' down *

86
At 00:04:21,261, Character said: - (exhales)
- We happy?

87
At 00:04:22,804, Character said: * I'm comin' down, down,
down, down, down *

88
At 00:04:25,557, Character said: * Comin' down
with a heartache *

89
At 00:04:32,564, Character said: * I ain't sick
but I g***t a fever *

90
At 00:04:36,443, Character said: * Blood pressure's
runnin' high *

91
At 00:04:39,696, Character said: * Pulse ain't right,
I can't sleep at night *

92
At 00:04:43,158, Character said: * And here's
the reason why *

93
At 00:04:47,328, Character said: Watch out, Earnhardt.

94
At 00:04:48,913, Character said: This ain't bumper cars.

95
At 00:04:49,998, Character said: I ** so sorry.
Wait a minute, Irene.

96
At 00:04:52,751, Character said: I guess I was just going
a little bit too fast.

97
At 00:04:54,878, Character said: - You alright?
- Yeah.

98
At 00:04:56,129, Character said: Mario Andretti over here.

99
At 00:04:58,340, Character said: * A doctor can't diagnose *

100
At 00:05:00,800, Character said: * 'Cause when a heart
starts to fall apart *

101
At 00:05:03,762, Character said: * You can't hear
through the stethoscope *

102
At 00:05:07,515, Character said: * What's wrong with me?
I said it's a simple fact *

103
At 00:05:10,935, Character said: * I don't believe
you're ever comin' back *

104
At 00:05:14,147, Character said: * I'm comin' down, down *

105
At 00:05:15,732, Character said: * I'm comin' down, down *

106
At 00:05:17,609, Character said: * Comin' down, down *

107
At 00:05:19,444, Character said: * Comin' down, down *

108
At 00:05:20,737, Character said: * I'm coming down, down *

109
At 00:05:22,280, Character said: * Down, down, down *

110
At 00:05:24,824, Character said: Joyce, can you wheel me
over to the shitter?

111
At 00:05:30,163, Character said: - You have to go again?
- Woman: Ugh.

112
At 00:05:50,266, Character said: (bright jazz saxophone playing)

113
At 00:05:59,859, Character said: (grunting)

114
At 00:06:11,454, Character said: * *

115
At 00:06:23,675, Character said: Hurry it up in there.

116
At 00:06:25,176, Character said: The bus is here.

117
At 00:06:26,386, Character said: The animals aren't
going anywhere.

118
At 00:06:28,596, Character said: We can't miss
the orangutan show.

119
At 00:06:30,932, Character said: She's very impressive.

120
At 00:06:32,058, Character said: Betty, you think
Velcro is impressive.

121
At 00:06:35,770, Character said: (grunting)

122
At 00:06:38,273, Character said: (trimmer whirring)

123
At 00:06:48,950, Character said: (sighs)

124
At 00:06:59,294, Character said: (jazz music continues)

125
At 00:07:06,551, Character said: (rustling)

126
At 00:07:39,000, Character said: (man mutters)

127
At 00:07:44,547, Character said: I'm so glad...

128
At 00:07:49,344, Character said: you came back.

129
At 00:07:52,305, Character said: (groaning)

130
At 00:07:59,854, Character said: (exhales)

131
At 00:08:02,482, Character said: * *

132
At 00:08:16,705, Character said: It's 11:10.
The bus is going to leave.

133
At 00:08:20,583, Character said: I g***t to piss.
What the hell is she
doing in there?

134
At 00:08:23,294, Character said: I don't know
what to tell you people.

135
At 00:08:25,422, Character said: She has diarrhea.

136
At 00:08:26,589, Character said: That's it.
I've had it.

137
At 00:08:28,466, Character said: Woman: The bus is ready.

138
At 00:08:29,467, Character said: Betty. Betty!

139
At 00:08:32,262, Character said: Oh. Good.

140
At 00:08:33,763, Character said: You gonna help me wipe?

141
At 00:08:35,724, Character said: Because my crevices
have crevices.

142
At 00:08:39,227, Character said: - Excuse me.
- Finally!

143
At 00:08:42,188, Character said: (door closes)

144
At 00:08:46,401, Character said: (jazz music continues)

145
At 00:08:56,327, Character said: (emu squawks)

146
At 00:09:00,582, Character said: Big deal.

147
At 00:09:02,375, Character said: Man: (on speakers)
Attention.

148
At 00:09:03,626, Character said: Would our guests
from Mossy Oaks retirement

149
At 00:09:05,587, Character said: please meet
the zookeeper liaison

150
At 00:09:07,422, Character said: in the primate area.

151
At 00:09:09,341, Character said: Melanie is performing now.

152
At 00:09:11,551, Character said: (animals chattering)

153
At 00:09:15,138, Character said: Joyce: Okay.
I think...