the art of crying.ENG Movie Subtitles

00:00:38,787 --> 00:00:44,I haven't praised you? That's not
true. What makes you say that?

00:00:44,587 --> 00:00:52,I only want to praise you when
you deserve it. Then and only then.

00:00:52,188 --> 00:00:55,I might as well kill myself.
Is that what you want?

00:00:55,988 --> 00:01:00,- Stop it!
- I'm going to hang myself.

00:01:02,348 --> 00:01:05,In my family staying awake
at night is important -

00:01:05,988 --> 00:01:10,- because that's when Dad gets
bad nerves and doesn't want to live.

00:01:10,508 --> 00:01:13,Then I hold my breath and
say the Lord's Prayer for Dad.

00:01:14,109 --> 00:01:20,If he's still alive when
I've said amen, there's still hope.

00:01:33,229 --> 00:01:37,What have you done?
Look at me.

00:01:43,110 --> 00:01:49,- Sorry. I'm such a terrible person.
- It'll be okay.

00:01:56,430 --> 00:02:01,When Dad is happy, he forgets to kill
himself. And when he forgets -

00:02:01,631 --> 00:02:07,- so do the rest of us, and then
we're alright and a normal family.

00:02:16,231 --> 00:02:20,SOUTH JUTLAND
00:02:25,872 --> 00:02:28,BIG BROTHER ASGER

00:02:30,352 --> 00:02:35,- Mom! Asger is here.
- Hi, Asger, you wimp.

00:02:35,672 --> 00:02:38,What was that, you rascal?

00:02:38,432 --> 00:02:43,My big brother goes to polytechnic.
Once he showed me a drawing.

00:02:43,193 --> 00:02:47,A mill seen from different angles.
You could even see the inside.

00:02:48,073 --> 00:02:51,Dad? Come on then.

00:02:57,553 --> 00:03:00,Hello, Dad.

00:03:00,473 --> 00:03:04,My big brother Asger
wants to be an architect.

00:03:04,514 --> 00:03:08,I'll borrow your room
tonight. Alright, Allan?

00:03:11,154 --> 00:03:15,- You need some more gravy.
- Thanks.

00:03:15,834 --> 00:03:19,- Goodness!
- Thanks, Mom. It's delicious.

00:03:19,834 --> 00:03:24,Sit down, Mom.
He can help himself.

00:03:27,475 --> 00:03:31,It tasted better last time, didn't it?

00:03:39,515 --> 00:03:43,Are there many girls at your school?

00:03:44,475 --> 00:03:48,There might be. One or two.

00:03:48,556 --> 00:03:51,So what's her name?

00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:56,That's not what I meant.
I'd just like to go there.

00:03:56,516 --> 00:04:02,Really? You have to be good at math.

00:04:04,116 --> 00:04:10,Dad, were you good at math
when you were in school?

00:04:10,637 --> 00:04:16,- You were good at doing sums.
- But that's not math, is it?

00:04:16,357 --> 00:04:20,- No.
- That's just adding.

00:04:21,077 --> 00:04:25,- Sorry.
- He only said it to please you.

00:04:25,837 --> 00:04:29,- Mind your own business.
- Sorry.

00:04:32,678 --> 00:04:37,What's wrong with holding
your fork in your right hand?

00:04:37,238 --> 00:04:41,Everyone else eats like this.

00:04:42,078 --> 00:04:45,Maybe in Sonderborg, but not here.

00:04:53,638 --> 00:04:58,Excuse me.
I have to go to the bathroom.

00:04:59,799 --> 00:05:05,He certainly isn't too grand
to take a s***t in the middle of dinner.

00:05:15,999 --> 00:05:19,When is Dad coming?

00:05:19,760 --> 00:05:24,- In a minute. Lie down.
- Are you sure?

00:05:25,880 --> 00:05:30,Our Father who art in heaven.
Hallowed be thy name.

00:05:30,600 --> 00:05:35,Thy kingdom come. Thy will be
done, on earth as it is in heaven.

00:05:35,760 --> 00:05:42,Mom? Did you take a sleeping pill?

00:05:44,841 --> 00:05:47,Can't you spit it out?

00:05:48,001 --> 00:05:51,But I've already swallowed it, Allan.

00:05:55,361 --> 00:06:02,For thine is the kingdom,
the power and the glory. Amen.

00:06:19,122 --> 00:06:22,What did I do wrong
to make Asger turn out like that?

00:06:23,003 --> 00:06:26,Asger is a good boy.

00:06:26,883 --> 00:06:30,My father would've
kicked me out on the spot.

00:06:37,603 --> 00:06:40,But I'm probably too soft.

00:06:41,123 --> 00:06:46,- So it's my own fault.
- Can we go to sleep now?

00:06:50,884 --> 00:06:57,I'm just a milkman.
I never g***t an education.

00:06:57,564 --> 00:07:01,We couldn't afford it.

00:07:03,484 --> 00:07:06,But I've done my best.

00:07:07,965 --> 00:07:11,Now there isn't even room
for me in my own bed.

00:07:11,725 --> 00:07:15,- Go to sleep.
- I have a better idea.

00:07:15,565 --> 00:07:20,Let's invite Asger. I'll lie
in the foot end and you can kick me.

00:07:20,845 --> 00:07:24,Stop it.

00:07:32,046 --> 00:07:35,I might as well
go downstairs and kill myself.

00:07:35,526 --> 00:07:40,I'll just grab a knife,
and you'll be rid of me.

00:07:43,046 --> 00:07:46,Well, if that's the way you want it...

00:07:52,647 --> 00:07:56,Aren't you going downstairs to Dad?

00:07:57,807 --> 00:08:01,Mom?

00:08:19,408 --> 00:08:22,Come upstairs.

00:08:22,728 --> 00:08:25,She'll have to come and get me.

00:08:27,528 --> 00:08:33,- There's plenty of room for all of us.
- There isn't room in your house.

00:08:33,928 --> 00:08:41,- Yes, there is. I can sleep here.
- Your mother doesn't want me.

00:08:46,969 --> 00:08:51,I'm no good. Not even as a father.

00:08:53,809 --> 00:08:57,That's not true.
You're the best father in the world.

00:08:57,849 --> 00:09:01,I can't do anything right.

00:09:05,490 --> 00:09:10,Don't cry, Dad.
It wasn't a hard fall.

00:09:11,090 --> 00:09:14,It didn't hurt.

00:09:18,090 --> 00:09:24,When I'm dead and buried, will you
promise to take good care of Mom?

00:09:38,051 --> 00:09:41,Sanne?

00:09:49,972 --> 00:09:53,Did he hit you?

00:09:55,812 --> 00:09:59,Is Dad unhappy?

00:10:01,292 --> 00:10:04,And has Mom gone to bed?

00:10:04,692 --> 00:10:07,Is he on the sofa?

00:10:13,533 --> 00:10:18,- Then I'd better go down there.
- I think so too.

00:10:21,773 --> 00:10:25,Is Asger up?

00:10:44,054 --> 00:10:47,- Don't tell Asger, okay?
- Okay.

00:11:09,215 --> 00:11:11,Good morning.

00:11:14,056 --> 00:11:17,What were you all doing last night?

00:11:18,736 --> 00:11:21,We were sleeping.

00:11:21,616 --> 00:11:26,I thought I heard you running up
and down the stairs. Is that true?

00:11:29,136 --> 00:11:31,No.

00:11:32,056 --> 00:11:36,I grew up in this family too, Allan.

00:11:36,777 --> 00:11:40,Not so that you'd notice.

00:11:47,057 --> 00:11:51,I know what it's like
when Dad starts crying.

00:11:51,217 --> 00:11:55,Then he threatens to do
all kinds of things.

00:11:55,417 --> 00:12:02,- But I won't let him do that to you.
- And he doesn't.

00:12:02,618 --> 00:12:05,What happened then?

00:12:06,138 --> 00:12:09,Do you promise not to tell Sanne?

00:12:14,658 --> 00:12:18,What mustn't I say?

00:12:19,979 --> 00:12:24,I can make her go downstairs
and comfort him and make him happy.

00:12:33,779 --> 00:12:37,Are you sleeping
with your own daughter?

00:12:37,739 --> 00:12:41,- What are you on about?
- You b***d!

00:12:42,100 --> 00:12:46,- Don't, Asger. Stop that!
- What's wrong?

00:12:48,780 --> 00:12:51,Asger, stop it.

00:12:51,660 --> 00:12:54,- Let him go.
- Call the police.

00:12:54,700 --> 00:12:57,Let him go!

00:12:58,700 --> 00:13:01,Let him go!

00:13:05,461 --> 00:13:11,Let him go! Don't get mixed up
in this. I don't want you here.

00:13:11,981 --> 00:13:15,- Get out of here!
- Don't you understand?

00:13:15,981 --> 00:13:18,Get out!

00:13:24,301 --> 00:13:27,Mind your own business.

00:13:28,982 --> 00:13:31,There we go.

00:13:33,622 --> 00:13:38,That should be
enough food for a week.

00:13:38,662 --> 00:13:44,- Fine, Mom.
- Isn't it time for Dad's lunch?

00:13:44,702 --> 00:13:48,He's probably reading
Donald Duck.

00:13:48,663 --> 00:13:53,- What's he done wrong?
- He hasn't done a thing wrong.

00:14:04,023 --> 00:14:07,- Are you hungry?
- No.

00:14:16,584 --> 00:14:22,- Have I done something wrong?
- No, what could that be?

00:14:38,865 --> 00:14:42,The bus will be here
in a minute, Mom.

00:14:46,145 --> 00:14:50,- Goodbye.
- Asger!

00:14:55,986 --> 00:15:01,Asger, what has Dad done wrong?

00:15:02,946 --> 00:15:08,If it happens again, then call me.
Even if it means moving in with me.

00:15:19,067 --> 00:15:22,GROCER BUDDE

00:15:32,467 --> 00:15:36,Dad's competitor
is Grocer Budde.

00:15:37,027 --> 00:15:41,His son Nis is our worst moped
rowdy although he's the youngest.

00:15:42,148 --> 00:15:47,Nis will inherit his father's shop
when he grows up.

00:15:49,188 --> 00:15:55,Budde has introduced self-service,
which had us laughing.

00:15:55,548 --> 00:16:00,As if you'd want to serve yourself.
Now he's expanded again -

00:16:00,829 --> 00:16:04,- and we're not laughing anymore.

00:16:07,629 --> 00:16:12,Budde gets violent
if he doesn't get his way.

00:16:12,389 -->...