The.Goldbergs.2013.S10E20.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H.264-NTb_track3_[eng] Subtitles

At 00:00:01,277, Character said: Back in the '80s,
my sister was a new mom,

2
At 00:00:03,382, Character said: and she was loving it,

3
At 00:00:05,143, Character said: which meant she had to put her
dream of law school on hold...

4
At 00:00:07,973, Character said: until now.

5
At 00:00:09,043, Character said: There are
my two loves.

6
At 00:00:10,389, Character said: One innocent and pure,
the other terrifying and hot.

7
At 00:00:13,323, Character said: You know, you can also
just walk in and say "hi."

8
At 00:00:15,118, Character said: So, how's the law school
application coming?

9
At 00:00:16,809, Character said: What's another word
for perfect?

10
At 00:00:17,879, Character said: Because it's
the opposite of that.

11
At 00:00:19,881, Character said: Oh, I'm sure my legal eagle
is just being modest.

12
At 00:00:23,471, Character said: "Do you have any
unusual hobbies?"

13
At 00:00:24,817, Character said: "Yes,
the Diaper Olympics."

14
At 00:00:26,371, Character said: You're looking
at the gold medalist
of applying butt paste.

15
At 00:00:28,959, Character said: "What are you
passionate about?"

16
At 00:00:30,133, Character said: "My daughter and,
sometimes, my husband."

17
At 00:00:32,273, Character said: I wrote what I wrote.
Deal with it.

18
At 00:00:33,723, Character said: These answers seem
kinda baby-centric.

19
At 00:00:36,243, Character said: It's just these
last few months,

20
At 00:00:37,416, Character said: my brain's been
nothing but
"baby, baby, baby,"

21
At 00:00:39,901, Character said: and it's hard
to switch gears.

22
At 00:00:41,006, Character said: Erica, look at me.

23
At 00:00:42,076, Character said: Being a lawyer
is your dream,

24
At 00:00:43,181, Character said: and you're gonna
make it happen.

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At 00:00:44,527, Character said: - I know it.
- You know, I coulda
been a lawyer.

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At 00:00:46,494, Character said: Oh, really?
You never mentioned it.

27
At 00:00:48,048, Character said: I have experience
arguing with judges,

28
At 00:00:50,326, Character said: police officers, magistrates,

29
At 00:00:52,362, Character said: and a homeless man
I like to call Matlock

30
At 00:00:54,502, Character said: because of his
Southern accent.

31
At 00:00:56,987, Character said: I made more homemade
baby food for Muriel.

32
At 00:00:59,024, Character said: Nice, she gobbles
this stuff up.

33
At 00:01:01,095, Character said: And I have to admit,
I may have sampled
the wares

34
At 00:01:03,373, Character said: during a peckish moment,

35
At 00:01:04,547, Character said: and my review is in--
delish.

36
At 00:01:06,273, Character said: I'm the best
at what I do.

37
At 00:01:08,033, Character said: In this very
specific case, sure.

38
At 00:01:09,966, Character said: Beep-beep, working attorney
coming through.

39
At 00:01:12,141, Character said: Greetings, small talk, compliments.
Now let's get to it.

40
At 00:01:14,660, Character said: I asked
Joanne to come by

41
At 00:01:15,868, Character said: to maybe help you out
with your essay.

42
At 00:01:17,215, Character said: Oh, that's so nice
of you, Joanne.

43
At 00:01:19,217, Character said: Especially since it sounds
like you're busy.

44
At 00:01:20,804, Character said: Currently, I'm smack dab
in the middle
of a 16-hour workday.

45
At 00:01:23,566, Character said: Whoa, 16 hours?

46
At 00:01:25,602, Character said: And with that,
I ** halfway through
my 20-minute lunch break.

47
At 00:01:27,846, Character said: Lunch breaks,
that's new.

48
At 00:01:29,399, Character said: This sounds like the firm
for you, Schmoopie.

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At 00:01:31,436, Character said: Yeah, maybe.

50
At 00:01:32,575, Character said: End of day
would be best.

51
At 00:01:33,645, Character said: Can we say
11 o'clock?

52
At 00:01:34,715, Character said: - P.M.?
- Yes.

53
At 00:01:36,820, Character said: No overnighters
with this firm.

54
At 00:01:38,236, Character said: I ** done
with that nonsense.

55
At 00:01:40,100, Character said: And the perks
just keep on coming.

56
At 00:01:41,618, Character said: Joanne, are you eating
the baby food?

57
At 00:01:43,275, Character said: I have a tight
lunch window,

58
At 00:01:44,621, Character said: and this stuff is so good,
it should be illegal.

59
At 00:01:47,141, Character said: And then Erica would
have to defend me.

60
At 00:01:49,212, Character said: - If she has the time.
- Yeah.

61
At 00:01:51,283, Character said: - Hey, don't hog the jar.
- I was here first.

62
At 00:01:52,802, Character said: - I really like it, though.
- I get this now. I need this.

63
At 00:01:54,217, Character said: - I really like this flavor.
- You live here!

64
At 00:01:55,391, Character said: - This is my baby's food!
- Oh!

65
At 00:01:56,978, Character said: ♪ I'm twisted up inside ♪

66
At 00:01:58,635, Character said: ♪ But nonetheless
I feel the need to say ♪

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At 00:02:04,779, Character said: ♪ I don't know the future ♪

68
At 00:02:06,195, Character said: ♪ But the past keeps getting
clearer every day ♪

69
At 00:02:10,026, Character said: It was April 5th,
1980-something

70
At 00:02:12,235, Character said: and I was in search
of inspiration.

71
At 00:02:14,410, Character said: I needed a creative jolt to
get me back behind the camera.

72
At 00:02:17,309, Character said: Boring.

73
At 00:02:18,552, Character said: Lackluster.

74
At 00:02:20,243, Character said: Yawn.

75
At 00:02:21,417, Character said: Men with hats
in black and white.

76
At 00:02:23,177, Character said: Welp, I did it.

77
At 00:02:25,524, Character said: I reached the end of TV.

78
At 00:02:27,457, Character said: But then I saw it.

79
At 00:02:28,803, Character said: A music video that blew my mind
and captured my heart.

80
At 00:02:32,013, Character said: It was so full of joy,
so fresh, so singular,

81
At 00:02:35,948, Character said: it gave me the spark
of originality I needed.

82
At 00:02:38,675, Character said: We're making an homage

83
At 00:02:40,194, Character said: to the Billy Joel video

84
At 00:02:41,609, Character said: "Uptown Girl"!

85
At 00:02:42,748, Character said: The cute
doo-wop song?

86
At 00:02:43,853, Character said: Cute?

87
At 00:02:45,165, Character said: It's a modern masterpiece
by a genius

88
At 00:02:47,132, Character said: at the height of his form.

89
At 00:02:48,306, Character said: Doesn't he sing into
a wrench and skip dance

90
At 00:02:50,515, Character said: while rhyming "boy"
with "toy"?

91
At 00:02:51,826, Character said: Height of his form.

92
At 00:02:53,103, Character said: I just have
one question--

93
At 00:02:54,726, Character said: Is Barry
gonna be involved?

94
At 00:02:57,867, Character said: No. He just plopped down
on the couch

95
At 00:02:59,455, Character said: and refused to leave.

96
At 00:03:00,525, Character said: Power move!

97
At 00:03:02,009, Character said: And he's also been
screaming "power move"

98
At 00:03:03,838, Character said: off and on
for the last hour.

99
At 00:03:05,115, Character said: Which is, in itself,
a power move!

100
At 00:03:08,533, Character said: So, Billy Joel.
What are we thinking?

101
At 00:03:10,397, Character said: I'm thinking Carmen and I
could play the lead roles

102
At 00:03:12,985, Character said: of high-class beauty
and everyman hero.

103
At 00:03:15,540, Character said: Yes!
It's settled.

104
At 00:03:16,713, Character said: I will play the role
of William Joel--

105
At 00:03:18,577, Character said: The curly-haired
musical prodigy

106
At 00:03:20,683, Character said: dripping with charisma,
s***x appeal, and sweat.

107
At 00:03:23,168, Character said: Again, I don't want
you involved,

108
At 00:03:24,963, Character said: and you could never fill
the shoes of the piano man.

109
At 00:03:26,999, Character said: - Then the obvious
choice is Carmen.
- What?

110
At 00:03:29,243, Character said: Yeah, what?

111
At 00:03:30,486, Character said: Carmen's
the uptown girl.

112
At 00:03:31,970, Character said: I'm the downtown boy.

113
At 00:03:33,661, Character said: Uh, not buying it.

114
At 00:03:35,042, Character said: Carmen's the one
with the real world bonafides

115
At 00:03:37,147, Character said: to play
a hard-working man.

116
At 00:03:38,632, Character said: Thanks?

117
At 00:03:39,943, Character said: Her father owns
an auto body shop,

118
At 00:03:41,773, Character said: while you live
in a white bread world

119
At 00:03:43,533, Character said: of Pudding Bars
and stunning older brothers.

120
At 00:03:46,398, Character said: You're the uptown girl
in a fancy car,

121
At 00:03:49,194, Character said: unable to handle a minor
automotive inconvenience.

122
At 00:03:52,715, Character said: He does paint
a compelling picture.

123
At 00:03:54,406, Character said: - I'm invested.
- No!

124
At 00:03:55,856, Character said: She's Christie Brinkley

125
At 00:03:57,409, Character said: and I'm the rough-and-tumble
Billy Joel.

126
At 00:03:59,342, Character said: Is Billy Joel even

127
At 00:04:00,964, Character said: the rough-and-tumble
Billy Joel?

128
At 00:04:02,449, Character said: Wait. Barry's idiotic idea
gave me a good one.

129
At 00:04:05,175, Character said: We can shoot the video

130
At 00:04:06,246, Character said: at Carmen's dad's
auto body shop!

131
At 00:04:08,455, Character said: Power move!

132
At 00:04:09,559, Character said: Starting to think

133
At 00:04:10,629, Character said: you don't have a grasp
on that phrase.

134
At 00:04:12,148, Character said: Whaddaya say, Carm?
It's the perfect location.

135
At 00:04:14,081, Character said: Plus, I can finally
meet your dad.

136
At 00:04:15,910, Character said: Oh.
Um, I'm not sure.

137