The. Bad. Guys. Haunted. Heist. 2024. NF. WEBRip Subtitles

00:00:25,316 --> 00:00:28,Long before
The Bad Guys terrified the city,

00:00:28,445 --> 00:00:29,hacking,

00:00:30,447 --> 00:00:31,disguising,

00:00:32,449 --> 00:00:33,lockpicking,

00:00:34,075 --> 00:00:37,and fighting our way
to the top of the crime world...

00:00:38,997 --> 00:00:42,...there lived a maniacal,
legendary, fiend of a crook.

00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:46,His name was Reginald E. Scary,

00:00:46,337 --> 00:00:49,and Scary loved loot more than anything
in the whole wide world.

00:00:50,049 --> 00:00:52,But Scary prized one item
over all the rest.

00:00:53,011 --> 00:00:55,One of the oldest pieces of loot
in existence.

00:00:55,972 --> 00:00:58,Empires were built on it,
wars fought over it,

00:00:58,683 --> 00:01:00,croissants shaped after it.

00:01:01,061 --> 00:01:02,The Crescent Amulet.

00:01:02,812 --> 00:01:06,Over time, he grew paranoid
that somebody would steal from him,

00:01:06,274 --> 00:01:07,the way he stole from others.

00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:09,He locked himself in,

00:01:09,402 --> 00:01:11,spending his final days cuddling, adoring,

00:01:11,988 --> 00:01:13,obsessing over the amulet.

00:01:13,990 --> 00:01:16,And he made one final vow before dying.

00:01:16,993 --> 00:01:22,If anyone dared steal
a single piece of his legendary loot,

00:01:22,373 --> 00:01:23,he'd haunt them...

00:01:23,958 --> 00:01:25,forever!

00:01:32,467 --> 00:01:36,All right, guys, what do you think?
It's the perfect Halloween heist.

00:01:36,513 --> 00:01:38,You want to rob
Reginald E. Scary's mansion?

00:01:38,765 --> 00:01:39,Uh, no way.

00:01:39,974 --> 00:01:42,This is just another one of
your excuses to scare us,

00:01:42,477 --> 00:01:44,like you always do on Halloween.

00:01:44,312 --> 00:01:46,When have I ever done that?

00:01:48,066 --> 00:01:51,{\an8}Stealing a mummy's loot
on Halloween.

00:01:51,569 --> 00:01:54,Great idea, Wolf. Wolf?

00:01:54,280 --> 00:01:56,I bet this thing is loaded with booty.

00:01:56,366 --> 00:01:57,Boo!

00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:02,Uh-uh! Don't say anything.
We're far from done.

00:02:04,666 --> 00:02:07,{\an8}Ah.
I love a pre-Halloween-heist latte.

00:02:08,628 --> 00:02:10,Eyeball?!

00:02:10,839 --> 00:02:12,Oh, I g***t you so good!

00:02:14,467 --> 00:02:16,And then, there was last year.

00:02:19,180 --> 00:02:21,{\an8}- Careful!
- Don't worry. I g***t this

00:02:21,766 --> 00:02:24,There's no laser I can't dodge.

00:02:25,395 --> 00:02:26,Ha-ha! G***t it.

00:02:30,525 --> 00:02:32,Ha-ha! Gotcha!

00:02:34,779 --> 00:02:35,Okay.

00:02:35,697 --> 00:02:39,{\an8}So, maybe I can't help myself sometimes.
This year will be different, I promise.

00:02:39,742 --> 00:02:42,No one's ever stolen
from Reginald E. Scary's mansion,

00:02:42,495 --> 00:02:45,{\an8}so pulling it off on Halloween
would show the whole crime world

00:02:45,623 --> 00:02:47,that The Bad Guys
aren't afraid of anything.

00:02:48,710 --> 00:02:50,{\an8}Wouldn't it be more fun
to stick around here

00:02:50,795 --> 00:02:53,{\an8}and hand out broccoli
to unsuspecting trick-or-treaters?

00:02:54,757 --> 00:02:56,{\an8}Oh, I love doing that.

00:02:56,509 --> 00:02:58,They're all,
"Thanks for the candy, mister...

00:02:58,928 --> 00:03:00,Huh? Broccoli?"

00:03:00,638 --> 00:03:02,And we're all, "Get out of here, shrimp!"

00:03:03,308 --> 00:03:06,{\an8}The amulet is some legendary loot,

00:03:06,144 --> 00:03:08,{\an8}but the stories, the lore...

00:03:08,771 --> 00:03:11,What if the ghost of Reginald E. Scary
shows up and causes trouble?

00:03:11,858 --> 00:03:14,You can't punch a ghost!
That's a scientific fact.

00:03:14,485 --> 00:03:17,Oh, come on!
You guys don't believe that stuff, do you?

00:03:17,989 --> 00:03:18,I don't know.

00:03:19,073 --> 00:03:22,Westside Wallabies tried to rob this place
and were never seen again.

00:03:22,285 --> 00:03:23,Rumors.

00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:24,I bet they botched the heist

00:03:24,996 --> 00:03:27,and used the legend to skip town
and save face.

00:03:27,916 --> 00:03:30,Guys, I know
I've fooled around in the past,

00:03:30,084 --> 00:03:32,but this loot is too legit for pranks.

00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:33,You in?

00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:35,It would be a primo steal.

00:03:35,423 --> 00:03:39,The only thing better than a croissant
is a big, old gem shaped like one.

00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:42,I can play the role of
someone who isn't scared.

00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:44,Yeah, obviously, we're in.

00:03:52,398 --> 00:03:54,Uh, I-I'll stand lookout by the car,

00:03:54,734 --> 00:03:58,w-while you search this very not scary,
definitely not haunted mansion.

00:03:58,988 --> 00:04:00,Aw, man!

00:04:00,281 --> 00:04:03,But I'm already disguised
as the lookout.

00:04:03,660 --> 00:04:05,Guess we'll both have to do it. Bummer.

00:04:06,454 --> 00:04:08,We don't need a lookout. Come on.

00:04:08,706 --> 00:04:11,Now, Scary built this place
as a fortress against thieves.

00:04:11,751 --> 00:04:14,These gates aren't gonna open themselves...

00:04:16,923 --> 00:04:19,Huh. L-Lucky gust of wind.

00:04:45,827 --> 00:04:47,Ooh!

00:04:47,161 --> 00:04:50,Scary used offset pins on the lock.
Notoriously tough to crack.

00:04:50,123 --> 00:04:53,But to a boxman like me,
it's like dining on caviar.

00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:13,And no Wi-Fi.
Not sure this heist needs a hacker.

00:05:14,063 --> 00:05:16,...this heist needs a hacker.

00:05:16,232 --> 00:05:18,Uh, is the creepy echo mocking me?

00:05:18,943 --> 00:05:21,Is the creepy echo mocking me?

00:05:21,654 --> 00:05:22,It's just an echo.

00:05:23,197 --> 00:05:25,Then how come your voice isn't echoing?

00:05:25,658 --> 00:05:28,...your voice... echoing.

00:05:28,369 --> 00:05:31,Come on, we gotta find the crypt where
legend says Scary died with the amulet.

00:05:47,263 --> 00:05:49,Guys, it's a statue!

00:05:55,313 --> 00:05:56,Ew!

00:05:56,230 --> 00:05:58,Tidy up after yourselves, spiders!

00:06:01,027 --> 00:06:04,Humans have the weirdest heads.
I'll never get used to 'em.

00:06:05,448 --> 00:06:06,Look at this. It's him.

00:06:10,870 --> 00:06:12,The creep's eyes are following me.

00:06:13,456 --> 00:06:15,It's an optical illusion.

00:06:15,166 --> 00:06:17,Emphasis on "illusion."

00:06:17,919 --> 00:06:19,Aha! Let there be light.

00:06:19,754 --> 00:06:21,Not so spooky with the lights on.

00:06:22,924 --> 00:06:25,Huh. Place could really use a dusting.

00:06:25,551 --> 00:06:27,Haunted piano!

00:06:28,721 --> 00:06:31,- I'm out.
- This music... I can't take it!

00:06:33,351 --> 00:06:35,It's not haunted.
It's just a player piano.

00:06:36,020 --> 00:06:39,You know, where you crank it up
and it plays automatically?

00:06:39,190 --> 00:06:41,Ha! Yeah, bro.
Can't believe you g***t scared of that.

00:06:41,859 --> 00:06:44,Hey, ghouls, take the big fish!

00:06:44,487 --> 00:06:46,- There's more meat on him!
- Hey!

00:06:46,114 --> 00:06:48,It's worse than the music!

00:06:48,324 --> 00:06:49,Nuh-uh. No.

00:06:49,325 --> 00:06:51,The furnace must have turned on
with the lights. See?

00:06:51,786 --> 00:06:53,I thought we were The Bad Guys,

00:06:53,538 --> 00:06:57,not the "scared by every little thing
that goes bump in the night guys."

00:06:57,625 --> 00:06:59,Let's focus.

00:06:59,127 --> 00:07:01,If Scary really did
hide his amulet in a crypt,

00:07:01,587 --> 00:07:03,he probably hid the access to it as well.

00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:06,That's what I'd do.
I'd never pose in chiaroscuro. So tacky.

00:07:07,009 --> 00:07:08,Wait a minute.

00:07:08,261 --> 00:07:09,The portrait.

00:07:09,762 --> 00:07:11,"My loot you'll never claim,

00:07:11,597 --> 00:07:14,as hidden as my name."

00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:15,Huh.

00:07:15,184 --> 00:07:17,Reginald E. Scary...

00:07:17,895 --> 00:07:19,Reginald E. Scary...

00:07:22,358 --> 00:07:23,- The heck?
- What is it?

00:07:24,277 --> 00:07:26,Oh, sorry. I had a thought.

00:07:26,362 --> 00:07:28,G***t a little excited.

00:07:28,114 --> 00:07:31,What if the "E" in the dude's name
represented a musical note?

00:07:31,159 --> 00:07:33,Maybe it's some secret key
that will open the crypt.

00:07:33,578 --> 00:07:36,I went deep undercover
for that jazz heist, remember?

00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:39,I'll play something in E. Jazz heists.

00:07:39,167 --> 00:07:42,It's the loot you don't steal
as much as the loot you do.

00:07:49,177 --> 00:07:50,This must be the way to the crypt.

00:07:55,516 --> 00:07:57,Ha-ha. Funny, Wolf.

00:07:57,226 --> 00:07:59,But you promised. No spooky pranks.

00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:00,I'm not doing it.

00:08:31,511 --> 00:08:33,It's moving on its own!

00:08:40,436 --> 00:08:43,Uh, I've never met these intruders before!

00:08:44,106 --> 00:08:45,I'm on your side.

00:08:48,569 --> 00:08:49,Wait a minute.

00:08:52,907 --> 00:08:53,Hey!

00:08:55,076 --> 00:08:57,- My friend here dares you to battle him.
- No, I don't!

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