Confessions.Of.A.Window.Cleaner.1974.1080p.BluRay.x264.AAC-[YTS.MX] Subtitles

00:02:22,600 --> 00:02:27,Hi, I'm Timmy Lee. It is
My first day of cleaning windows.

00:02:27,200 --> 00:02:29,Ever thought about window cleaners ?

00:02:29,320 --> 00:02:31,They spend their days
looking into hundreds of little boxes,

00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:35,many of which have g***t people in.
sorts of people.

00:02:36,680 --> 00:02:40,That's me !
What about that physique, eh ?

00:02:40,280 --> 00:02:41,A bit Steve McQueen, isn't it ?

00:02:42,720 --> 00:02:45,No wonder the birds go crazy for me.

00:02:45,440 --> 00:02:47,Favourite gear
a white nylon T-shirt.

00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:51,Because when you wet it, you can
press it up against the window.

00:02:51,320 --> 00:02:52,And then give them a little smile.

00:02:54,400 --> 00:02:57,Well, nice for the old ones.
Makes all sort of Remembrance Day.

00:02:59,560 --> 00:03:02,Still, you can't expect to go potty
on your first day, can you ?

00:03:08,960 --> 00:03:12,Cor, cop a load of that, eh ?
What a knocker factory !

00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:17,She's obviously a pushover
for my brand of animal magnetism.

00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:19,Piss off !

00:03:21,360 --> 00:03:23,Whoops ! Lost my balance.

00:03:25,480 --> 00:03:27,And my bucket.

00:03:40,080 --> 00:03:42,Some of the things you see
are quite an education.

00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:48,I mean, just look at that shower !
But may, they're big for their age.

00:03:48,920 --> 00:03:50,They're also Mg for my age.

00:04:07,360 --> 00:04:10,But all this was nothing to what I saw
in a shop down the high street.

00:04:17,400 --> 00:04:21,It all started with a little bit
of window undressing.

00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:30,I 'vo heard of your work gelling on lop of
you, but not you gelling on lop of your work !

00:04:47,280 --> 00:04:49,What a diabolical way
to start a new career.

00:04:49,840 --> 00:04:52,Flat on me back,
staring up blokes' trouser legs.

00:04:53,560 --> 00:04:57,And along comes this bird. If it hadn't been
for her, I might have jacked it in right away.

00:04:58,920 --> 00:05:02,Because she awoke in me deep-rooted
feelings of sensilivily and delicacy

00:05:02,760 --> 00:05:05,I never knew ! had.
Never knew I could say.

00:05:06,440 --> 00:05:10,In fact, one look at Elizabeth
and I fell like a pal ! of lead knickers.

00:05:11,080 --> 00:05:14,She was the type of girl you say,
"Please, may I ? before you give her one.

00:05:14,600 --> 00:05:15,A card, I mean.

00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:21,Because Sid did promise me a piece of
the action with any new customers. Cori

00:05:21,840 --> 00:05:24,Wouldn't have minded
a place of her action.

00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:28,What are you trying to do, ruin me ?

00:05:28,800 --> 00:05:31,One broken window,
one bucketed traffic warden

00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:36,threatening to sue, and now you
tell me you lost your squeegee.

00:05:36,240 --> 00:05:38,I must've dropped it under the crowd.
And that’s another thing.

00:05:38,320 --> 00:05:40,I pay you to clean windows.

00:05:40,240 --> 00:05:44,If you wanna lie on the floor and look up
skirts, you do it in your own time, right ?

00:05:44,880 --> 00:05:47,But I told you, it was shock. They
were having it off in the window.

00:05:47,640 --> 00:05:50,So ? Have you g***t
a sax hang-up or something ?

00:05:50,360 --> 00:05:52,Ho, but I thought
she had three legs.

00:05:53,080 --> 00:05:58,Look, Timmy boy, in our business
you've g***t to be Immune from shocks,

00:05:58,320 --> 00:06:02,especially from birds,
three-legged or one-legged.

00:06:02,480 --> 00:06:05,As long as they are
satisfied customers ...

00:06:06,600 --> 00:06:08,they bring in new ones.

00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:11,Hey, I met a real
knockout this morning.

00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:15,Fabulous face, fantastic body,
legs right up to her armpits.

00:06:15,880 --> 00:06:17,- What about her windows ?
- Windows ?

00:06:18,040 --> 00:06:19,Oh, I gave her a card.

00:06:19,560 --> 00:06:22,It’s no good
just chatting up dolly birds.

00:06:22,280 --> 00:06:25,You've gotta grease the old hags too.

00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:29,It’s not all Raquel Welch pulling
you onto her dumplings, you know.

00:06:32,680 --> 00:06:34,Christ, what also did you do ?

00:06:36,560 --> 00:06:40,Hello. As we were passing, I just thought
I'd stop and see If you were all right.

00:06:40,720 --> 00:06:42,These falls can sometimes
have delayed affects.

00:06:43,160 --> 00:06:45,Oh, yes. I mean, no !

00:06:45,480 --> 00:06:47,Thank you,
I'm all right.

00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:50,Fina. Well, I have to get back
on patrol now. Good night.

00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:55,What's all that, then ?
It was her.

00:06:55,440 --> 00:06:57,Who ?
The bird, I told you.

00:06:58,080 --> 00:07:02,Have you gone stark raving bonkers,
trying to chat up female fuzz ?

00:07:02,280 --> 00:07:05,I didn't know who she was. But I don't care, Sid.
Oh, Isn't she a knockout ?

00:07:05,840 --> 00:07:07,Oh, yeah, you picked
the right word, boy.

00:07:07,720 --> 00:07:09,What I wouldn't do for her.

00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:12,Well, I'm more worried about what
you wouldn't do for my customers.

00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:14,What do you mean, eh ?

00:07:14,760 --> 00:07:19,I mean, I've g***t to he sure, If some
bird offers to squeeze out your chamole,

00:07:20,120 --> 00:07:22,you don't go retracting your ladder !

00:07:25,400 --> 00:07:27,Christ, anyone would think
I was a bloody virgin

00:07:27,720 --> 00:07:29,I do. And so does Rosie.

00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:31,What does she know, eh ?

00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:33,Sisters always know.

00:07:34,760 --> 00:07:39,I don't know what you're on about.
Responsibilities, that’s what.

00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:41,You taking over some of mina.

00:07:44,720 --> 00:07:48,I mean, with Roeie pregnant, I feel it’s
only proper I should cut it out for a while.

00:07:48,920 --> 00:07:50,Window cleaning ?

00:07:50,200 --> 00:07:51,Not cleaning,
you hark !

00:07:52,080 --> 00:07:54,Servicing, keeping the customers happy.

00:07:54,320 --> 00:07:55,Oh. Anything
I can do, Sid ?

00:07:56,160 --> 00:07:59,Yeah, well, that’s what worry me.
Can you do ?

00:07:59,360 --> 00:08:00,Oh, come off it, Sidi

00:08:00,960 --> 00:08:03,Never mind 'Come off it.'
Have you ever been on it ?

00:08:03,440 --> 00:08:04,Of course I have !

00:08:04,640 --> 00:08:08,Yeah ? I don't reckon you could dip your
tassel in a fire bucket without instructions.

00:08:08,680 --> 00:08:09,Vary funny, Sid.

00:08:10,240 --> 00:08:14,All right, Timmo. After dinner,
you and me are going out.

00:08:14,800 --> 00:08:15,What for ?

00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:17,To get a professional opinion.

00:08:19,200 --> 00:08:22,Mind you, I didn't like
it to admit it, but Sid was right.

00:08:22,520 --> 00:08:26,My s***x wife held as much sensation
as a concrete contraceptive.

00:08:26,280 --> 00:08:30,In fact, I could describe myself as
the walking answer to contraception.

00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:31,I don't do It !

00:08:32,400 --> 00:08:36,With me, it’s more a can of good
kiss, good fool and good night.

00:08:36,320 --> 00:08:37,Now I will say ! Sid.

00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:40,I mean, he really deserved
the Queen's Award for Industry.

00:08:46,880 --> 00:08:49,Oh, God. I don't know why your old man
works in the lost property off too.

00:08:49,880 --> 00:08:51,Might just as well move
the whole lot here !

00:08:51,720 --> 00:08:52,Dad's working on it.

00:08:53,120 --> 00:08:54,I wouldn't mind If he nicked
something worthwhile.

00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:57,- That you, boys ?
- Yes, Mum.

00:08:57,680 --> 00:08:59,- How did it all go, dear ?
- Oh, fina, Mum.

00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:03,You could say it was a great day in the
history of British window cleaning.

00:09:03,360 --> 00:09:06,Oh, that’s nice. Rosie could
hardly wait for you to get hack.

00:09:06,840 --> 00:09:08,Oh, that’s nice too.

00:09:08,360 --> 00:09:11,Yeah, she's been dreaming about
that chocolate fudge all day.

00:09:13,040 --> 00:09:15,Oh, Sidney,
you didn't forget it ?

00:09:15,640 --> 00:09:18,She told you she'd g***t a
craving for chocolate fudge.

00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:20,Yeah, well, I know.
I'm sorry. I forgot.

00:09:20,240 --> 00:09:21,Sidney !
Hera, love !

00:09:22,600 --> 00:09:26,Eh ! And how's little
earth mother tonight, eh ?

00:09:26,280 --> 00:09:28,I'm starving.
He forgot it.

00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:30,You didn't.

00:09:30,960 --> 00:09:34,Sorry, love, it slipped me mind. I'll go
after dinner. The nawngant stocks it.

00:09:34,280 --> 00:09:38,One little thing. I ask you
to do one little thing

00:09:39,400 --> 00:09:43,I'm sorry, Rosie, love. It’s not
the end of the world. I'll go now.

00:09:43,720 --> 00:09:44,I don't want it now !

00:09:45,040 --> 00:09:46,All right, I won't go
And g***t it now !

00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:50,Rosie, all I want to do
is make you happy.

00:09:50,200 --> 00:09:53,Than pie off.
Rosie

00:09:54,480 --> 00:09:58,Yes, uh ... Well, I think I'll have a wash
before the thieving magpie gets home.

00:09:58,640 --> 00:10:00,Timmy, I won't have you
talking Like that.

123...