00:00:09,533 --> 00:00:11,- It's that time of year, love birds.

00:00:11,767 --> 00:00:13,The annual Shirley Chisholm Dance is coming.

00:00:13,433 --> 00:00:16,Remember, boys are not permitted to say no

00:00:16,367 --> 00:00:18,if asked to the dance. Happy hunting, beezys.

00:00:18,900 --> 00:00:20,- This some ol' bullshit.

00:00:20,367 --> 00:00:22,When are men gonna get their way in this country?

00:00:22,267 --> 00:00:23,- This what women been fighting for--

00:00:23,767 --> 00:00:24,the right to choose.

00:00:24,567 --> 00:00:26,And since Randy's out of town,

00:00:26,333 --> 00:00:27,Cindy's g***t no choice but to ask me.

00:00:27,533 --> 00:00:30,That's why I wore my Michael Jordan cologne.

00:00:30,333 --> 00:00:31,Man, that s***t stink.

00:00:31,700 --> 00:00:34,That's why that nig's always crying on the internet.

00:00:34,600 --> 00:00:36,Ah! - Now that women can choose,

00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:38,it's gonna be like the NBA Draft,

00:00:38,633 --> 00:00:40,and you know I'ma be a thottery pick.

00:00:43,467 --> 00:00:45,- Jamal!

00:00:45,633 --> 00:00:47,- Oh, s***t. - And it looks like

00:00:47,000 --> 00:00:49,you're about to be drafted by the Memphis Grizzlies.

00:00:49,167 --> 00:00:50,- I'm taking yo thick a***s

00:00:50,633 --> 00:00:53,to the Shirley Chisholm Dance, motherfucker.

00:00:53,467 --> 00:00:55,- Who the f***k is Shirley Chisholm anyway?

00:00:55,500 --> 00:00:57,And why does this p***n star get her own dance?

00:00:57,667 --> 00:00:59,- She did the first interracial b***b.

00:00:59,133 --> 00:01:02,She was the Jackie Robinson of p***n.

00:01:02,267 --> 00:01:04,- Okay, first off, y'all are stupid.

00:01:04,933 --> 00:01:07,Shirley Chisholm was Secretary of the House Democratic Caucus,

00:01:07,367 --> 00:01:10,a member of both the House of Representatives

00:01:10,500 --> 00:01:12,and the New York State Assembly.

00:01:12,067 --> 00:01:14,She also ran for President.

00:01:14,400 --> 00:01:16,- Wow, she ran for President and sucked d***k for a living?

00:01:16,333 --> 00:01:20,Talk about a modern woman. - Anyway, Grover,

00:01:20,067 --> 00:01:21,I was gonna go with Randy, but he's wild and out

00:01:21,533 --> 00:01:24,at the Nick Cannon Comedy Conference in Delaware.

00:01:24,667 --> 00:01:27,And since I don't like any of the other guys in school,

00:01:27,467 --> 00:01:31,I was wondering if you weren't busy Saturday night,

00:01:31,133 --> 00:01:34,if you'd like to...

00:01:34,067 --> 00:01:37,- Go to the dance with me? - Huh?

00:01:37,800 --> 00:01:40,- Oh, hell nah.

00:01:46,267 --> 00:01:47,This must be what Biggie felt like,

00:01:47,100 --> 00:01:48,'cause I'm ready to die.

00:01:48,433 --> 00:01:50,I can't go to the dance with no crackhead.

00:01:50,967 --> 00:01:52,- Look on the bright side. Crack creates legends,

00:01:52,367 --> 00:01:56,like DMX, Lawrence Taylor, and Marion Barry.

00:01:56,433 --> 00:01:58,- S***t, Cracky might win a Grammy,

00:01:58,700 --> 00:02:00,or she might become the next Mayor of D.C.

00:02:00,267 --> 00:02:02,- Well, unless she gonna turn into

00:02:02,433 --> 00:02:04,Whitney Houston by Saturday, I'm f***d.

00:02:04,667 --> 00:02:06,- I don't wanna go to the dance with you.

00:02:06,167 --> 00:02:08,- Your body, my choice.

00:02:08,267 --> 00:02:09,- I wish one of these chicks would come out

00:02:09,867 --> 00:02:11,and try to body me.

00:02:11,733 --> 00:02:13,To hell with a Shirley Chisholm Dance.

00:02:13,367 --> 00:02:16,- Uh, Milk... - Oh, hell no.

00:02:17,367 --> 00:02:20,- But-- - No, before you even ask...

00:02:20,067 --> 00:02:21,ain't no way I'm going to the dance

00:02:21,400 --> 00:02:23,with a dickless version of Jamal.

00:02:23,100 --> 00:02:25,Now take both of your chocolate boxes, and kick rocks.

00:02:25,233 --> 00:02:28,- This wigger!

00:02:28,400 --> 00:02:29,- I'm telling you,

00:02:29,767 --> 00:02:31,it's this whole Shirley Chisholm Dance thing.

00:02:31,533 --> 00:02:34,The fact that they get to choose empowers them.

00:02:34,900 --> 00:02:37,It's like bears coming out of hibernation,

00:02:37,267 --> 00:02:39,and we ain't nothing but some salmon, my nigs.

00:02:43,467 --> 00:02:45,- Aye, Griselda, what it smell like?

00:02:45,067 --> 00:02:46,- S***t, smell good.

00:02:46,100 --> 00:02:47,What them stank balls do?

00:02:47,700 --> 00:02:51,- Oh, word, I ain't know you was coming like that.

00:02:51,067 --> 00:02:52,You single? - Not no more.

00:02:52,500 --> 00:02:55,I'm choosing you to go to the dance with me.

00:02:55,067 --> 00:02:58,Now gimme that tongue, nigga.

00:02:58,067 --> 00:03:00,Walk me to class. - Okay, then.

00:03:00,800 --> 00:03:03,- I thought you said you wasn't gonna let no chick claim you.

00:03:03,167 --> 00:03:05,- You see that a***s, though, my nig?

00:03:05,133 --> 00:03:06,- Don't you slap my man.

00:03:06,733 --> 00:03:08,I love this bitch.

00:03:08,633 --> 00:03:11,- Man, if Milk snagged Griselda,

00:03:11,067 --> 00:03:13,I know I'm 'bout to be in there, pimp.

00:03:13,767 --> 00:03:15,Peep game.

00:03:15,467 --> 00:03:18,You wanna wet dicks and chill? Ah!

00:03:18,100 --> 00:03:20,Trying to Hulu and chili? Ah!

00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:21,You trying to disappoint your daddy?

00:03:21,833 --> 00:03:23,Ah!

00:03:23,467 --> 00:03:26,Aye, baby, how 'bout you and I, uh--

00:03:26,733 --> 00:03:31,You are f***g hilarious.

00:03:33,400 --> 00:03:35,- D***n, I would've f***d her too.

00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:40,- Jamal!

00:03:40,933 --> 00:03:43,- Aye, your girl's bellowing. Stop fighting it, Jamal.

00:03:43,433 --> 00:03:44,You know you going with big drawls.

00:03:44,300 --> 00:03:47,- Never that!

00:03:47,867 --> 00:03:51,Don't tell anyone I'm in here.

00:03:51,633 --> 00:03:53,- Just a reminder, guys,

00:03:53,067 --> 00:03:55,the Shirley Chisholm Dance is just three days away.

00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:57,There are still some available suitors left,

00:03:57,800 --> 00:04:00,like Jank Eye Jarvis and Jamal.

00:04:00,167 --> 00:04:02,- Uh, at least I'm going.

00:04:02,400 --> 00:04:04,- Keep the change. - What up, Cindy?

00:04:04,733 --> 00:04:05,You find anyone to go to the dance with?

00:04:05,800 --> 00:04:08,- Not yet. Still deciding.

00:04:08,400 --> 00:04:10,I have a lot of options.

00:04:10,067 --> 00:04:13,I g***t two terabytes of d***k pics to sift through.

00:04:14,567 --> 00:04:16,Oh, great, here's another one.

00:04:16,100 --> 00:04:19,No, wait, it's just a picture of an uncircumcised pepperoni.

00:04:19,400 --> 00:04:21,- Be right back. I need more light.

00:04:21,433 --> 00:04:22,- Too bad you going with Cracky.

00:04:22,667 --> 00:04:24,It would've been much easier going with you.

00:04:24,600 --> 00:04:25,We could've had fun.

00:04:25,900 --> 00:04:28,- So if, uh, Cracky doesn't go to the dance,

00:04:28,800 --> 00:04:29,does that mean you'll go with me?

00:04:29,733 --> 00:04:31,- We'll never know, will we?

00:04:31,167 --> 00:04:34,See you later, new booty.

00:04:37,433 --> 00:04:38,- Looks like I'm the only one

00:04:38,600 --> 00:04:40,that's gonna go to the dance and get some.

00:04:40,500 --> 00:04:42,But don't worry, Grove, I'll let you smell the nine.

00:04:42,767 --> 00:04:44,- I don't want Cracky's crack. I want Cindy's.

00:04:44,467 --> 00:04:46,I guess I gotta go over to her house

00:04:46,567 --> 00:04:48,and break a crackhead's heart.

00:04:50,067 --> 00:04:52,- What are you doing? Lipstick doesn't go there.

00:04:52,267 --> 00:04:54,- I'm just trying to fix myself up.

00:04:54,067 --> 00:04:55,- Girl, you look like the puppet from "Saw."

00:04:55,200 --> 00:04:57,- I was going for Lil' Kim.

00:04:57,600 --> 00:04:59,- The puppet from "Saw" is cuter.

00:04:59,667 --> 00:05:00,- I know he's only going to the dance with me

00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:03,'cause he has to. I want him to like me.

00:05:03,767 --> 00:05:06,- Well, Cracky, that's what makeup, weaves, fake asses,

00:05:06,667 --> 00:05:08,and non-surgical facelifts are for.

00:05:08,567 --> 00:05:09,We use that to get the boys interested,

00:05:09,833 --> 00:05:12,but keeping them is all about what's on the inside.

00:05:12,567 --> 00:05:15,- On the inside? You mean like Methadone?

00:05:15,567 --> 00:05:17,- No, girl, I mean your good qualities.

00:05:17,800 --> 00:05:19,Once what's on the inside gets out,

00:05:19,867 --> 00:05:22,Grover can see you for who you really are.

00:05:22,433 --> 00:05:24,- I'm more than a girl with...