Now.Apocalypse.S01E01.This.Is.The.Beginning.Of.The.End.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H.264-NTb Subtitles

At 00:00:18,745, Character said: [Ulysses Voiceover]
I've always had a simultaneous fear of,

2
At 00:00:21,373, Character said: and attraction toward,
the unknown.

3
At 00:00:24,793, Character said: And in these f***g
dark and scary times,

4
At 00:00:27,212, Character said: it's easy to adopt a "What

5
At 00:00:29,024, Character said: difference does
it make?" attitude.

6
At 00:00:31,592, Character said: So I often find myself
in these situations

7
At 00:00:34,595, Character said: where my heart's pounding so
fast I can barely breathe.

8
At 00:00:39,600, Character said: And I can't tell if it's
excitement or terror or both.

9
At 00:00:43,729, Character said: -No!
-It's not like I'm brave

10
At 00:00:45,647, Character said: or anything, it's more
reckless stupidity,

11
At 00:00:51,945, Character said: an adrenaline fix,

12
At 00:00:54,364, Character said: throwing myself into the
void to see what happens.

13
At 00:01:04,205, Character said: No!

14
At 00:01:06,834, Character said: Help me!

15
At 00:01:08,813, Character said: [ man groans ]

16
At 00:01:12,243, Character said: [ screams ]

17
At 00:01:14,872, Character said: [ Ulysses grunting ]

18
At 00:01:16,082, Character said: Harder!
Harder!

19
At 00:01:19,556, Character said: -[ door thuds ]
-Dave?

20
At 00:01:20,557, Character said: Oh, s***t!

21
At 00:01:21,642, Character said: My husband's home!

22
At 00:01:22,726, Character said: Oh, s***t.

23
At 00:01:24,770, Character said: [ stammers ]
What should I do?

24
At 00:01:28,649, Character said: DAVE'S HUSBAND:
Dave, where are you?!

25
At 00:01:30,359, Character said: DAVE: In here, babe.

26
At 00:01:33,278, Character said: -[Ulysses yelps]
-[loud thud]

27
At 00:01:46,625, Character said: [Ulysses Voiceover] So yeah,
I realized that one day

28
At 00:01:48,460, Character said: these crazy adventures
will probably get me

29
At 00:01:50,462, Character said: into some gigantic trouble
I can't get out of.

30
At 00:01:55,634, Character said: But it's almost like
I can't help myself.

31
At 00:01:57,844, Character said: ["Star Roving" by Slowdive]

32
At 00:02:01,905, Character said: I do s***t sometimes and
I really don't know why.

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At 00:02:07,902, Character said: To avoid boredom, I guess.

34
At 00:02:11,443, Character said: To feel alive.

35
At 00:02:14,486, Character said: Just for the f***g
f***k of it.

36
At 00:02:31,377, Character said: ♪ Give it away now, girl ♪

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At 00:02:35,716, Character said: ♪ Can't hold down tonight ♪

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At 00:02:57,571, Character said: [panting]

39
At 00:03:00,490, Character said: Ah.

40
At 00:03:04,084, Character said: Sorry, dude.

41
At 00:03:06,333, Character said: Whatever.

42
At 00:03:08,568, Character said: Hey, Severine.

43
At 00:03:11,231, Character said: I thought you were
sleeping out tonight.

44
At 00:03:13,568, Character said: Yeah, uh, I'm not.

45
At 00:03:18,184, Character said: Anyhoo, please, continue.

46
At 00:03:22,188, Character said: Goodnight, Ulysses.

47
At 00:03:23,523, Character said: Goodnight.

48
At 00:03:25,233, Character said: Night, dude.

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At 00:03:28,152, Character said: ULYSSES: So, Ford and I have
a sort of strange relationship.

50
At 00:03:32,282, Character said: We've been roommates
since college

51
At 00:03:35,994, Character said: and we kind of drunk messed
around once freshman year.

52
At 00:03:39,247, Character said: I love him unconditionally

53
At 00:03:41,833, Character said: and if he had even one
sexually ambiguous molecule

54
At 00:03:45,587, Character said: in his body, we'd
probably be married,

55
At 00:03:47,380, Character said: but Ford's that truly
rare Kinsey zero

56
At 00:03:51,384, Character said: in contrast to my
ever oscillating four,

57
At 00:03:54,262, Character said: which means I'm not
so totally queer

58
At 00:03:56,389, Character said: that I haven't rubbed out a
few fantasizing about Severine.

59
At 00:04:00,101, Character said: Everything in my life right
now is a question mark,

60
At 00:04:03,396, Character said: which pretty much explains
what this thing is about.

61
At 00:04:06,899, Character said: It's definitely not a vlog.

62
At 00:04:08,776, Character said: It's more of a place to
download the random s***t

63
At 00:04:12,196, Character said: that's in my head to keep it
from like [lips pop]exploding.

64
At 00:04:15,658, Character said: Back in school, I thought
I wanted to be an actor,

65
At 00:04:19,912, Character said: but once I g***t to LA,
I quickly discovered

66
At 00:04:22,624, Character said: that's probably the lamest,
most soul-crushing thing

67
At 00:04:25,126, Character said: I could do with my life.

68
At 00:04:26,878, Character said: And Ford is that
sad LA cliché,

69
At 00:04:29,172, Character said: an aspiring screenwriter.

70
At 00:04:31,257, Character said: But movies are even more
irrelevant now than books.

71
At 00:04:34,385, Character said: It's all stupid superheroes
and YA bullshit.

72
At 00:04:38,306, Character said: And thanks to Instagram,
art and photography,

73
At 00:04:40,683, Character said: all of that's pretty
much obsolete now too,

74
At 00:04:42,810, Character said: so lacking a better outlet,

75
At 00:04:44,562, Character said: here I ** talking to
myself in the dark.

76
At 00:04:56,880, Character said: But also, there's
something weird going on

77
At 00:05:01,594, Character said: that I feel I need to document.

78
At 00:05:09,962, Character said: I've been having this nightmare,

79
At 00:05:11,673, Character said: the same one over and over,

80
At 00:05:13,841, Character said: two or three times a
week for the past month.

81
At 00:05:16,094, Character said: MAN: No!

82
At 00:05:17,144, Character said: [Ulysses Voiceover] And it's
so vivid and freakishly real

83
At 00:05:19,514, Character said: that when I wake up, it's still
there hovering over me like

84
At 00:05:23,101, Character said: it's not just a dream,

85
At 00:05:24,936, Character said: like it's trying to
tell me something.

86
At 00:05:28,147, Character said: Maybe smoke a smidge
less pot before bedtime?

87
At 00:05:31,275, Character said: Carly, I'm being serious.

88
At 00:05:32,856, Character said: Don't you ever get
bizarre premonitions?

89
At 00:05:35,363, Character said: -No.
-Well, I do and I'ma double Scorpio.

90
At 00:05:39,283, Character said: It's the most psychic
of all the signs.

91
At 00:05:41,244, Character said: And I've had premonitions
before, but this is different.

92
At 00:05:44,500, Character said: It's like we're teetering on
the brink of total annihilation.

93
At 00:05:48,054, Character said: CARLY: Okay, well, that's
every f***g day now

94
At 00:05:51,500, Character said: in this tragic s***t show
era we're living in.

95
At 00:05:53,381, Character said: But anyway, are you still
cyber-stalking that guy?

96
At 00:05:57,140, Character said: -Gabriel.
-Mm.

97
At 00:05:59,137, Character said: Yeah. We were supposed to hang
out last night, but...

98
At 00:06:01,556, Character said: Oh, let me guess, he flaked.

99
At 00:06:05,992, Character said: Hey, look, this guy's
a gnarly 300-pound catfish.

100
At 00:06:10,846, Character said: That's why I've been pushing
to meet in real life.

101
At 00:06:12,942, Character said: Look, check it out.

102
At 00:06:14,097, Character said: -Oh. He is pretty.
-Right?

103
At 00:06:17,071, Character said: I know it sounds hokey, but
I just get this vibe that we're

104
At 00:06:19,342, Character said: destined to be.

105
At 00:06:20,116, Character said: Okay, double Scorpio.

106
At 00:06:22,118, Character said: Honestly, just looking at
him makes me dizzy and hard.

107
At 00:06:25,540, Character said: You know, when I
first met Jethro,

108
At 00:06:27,081, Character said: seeing him sneeze
would make me c***m,

109
At 00:06:29,584, Character said: but now, like uh, last night,
in the middle of f***g,

110
At 00:06:32,620, Character said: Jethro leans in and for some
ungodly reason, whispers...

111
At 00:06:38,808, Character said: Mm, teach me, baby, teach me.

112
At 00:06:40,678, Character said: -What?
-[Jethro moans]

113
At 00:06:41,679, Character said: Teach me!

114
At 00:06:42,847, Character said: Is that something you
g***t from a bad p***o?

115
At 00:06:45,057, Character said: Oh, come on, baby!

116
At 00:06:46,309, Character said: Yeah, teach me how
to drive you wild!

117
At 00:06:48,437, Character said: Yes, baby!

118
At 00:06:49,549, Character said: Make me a student!

119
At 00:06:51,063, Character said: I'm a vessel for your pleasure!

120
At 00:06:53,107, Character said: -[groans]
-Yeah!

121
At 00:06:54,233, Character said: Ah, teach me, baby!

122
At 00:06:55,985, Character said: -Come on, yeah!
-Can you just slow down

123
At 00:06:57,069, Character said: a little bit, please?!

124
At 00:06:58,488, Character said: Teach me, baby!
Teach me!

125
At 00:06:59,834, Character said: -Oh, s***t.
-And it gets worse.

126
At 00:07:01,860, Character said: He wants me to go to his f***g
meditation class tonight.

127
At 00:07:05,369, Character said: But meditating
gives you anxiety.

128
At 00:07:07,163, Character said: Yeah, I know.

129
At 00:07:09,081, Character said: It's so easy for him. His brain,
his natural resting state,

130
At 00:07:11,334, Character said: is just a blank
void of nothingness.

131
At 00:07:14,712, Character said: -[phone buzzes]
-[Carly sighs]

132
At 00:07:17,173, Character said: Is it the catfish?

133
At 00:07:18,874, Character said: Oh, s***t, really?
What'd he say?

134
At 00:07:20,718, Character said: That he wants to meet tonight.

135
At 00:07:22,470, Character said: Okay, well, my advice,
set the bar low.

136
At 00:07:26,260, Character said: Very low.

137
At 00:07:30,853, Character said: ♪...