Only When I Laugh s01e02 Operation Norman Subtitles

At 00:00:22,000, Character said: I'm H -A -P -P -Y.

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At 00:00:26,020, Character said: I'm H -A -P -P -Y.

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At 00:00:29,160, Character said: I know I **, I'm sure I **.

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At 00:00:33,500, Character said: I'm H -A -P -P -Y.

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At 00:00:36,600, Character said: I know I **, I'm sure I **. He's H -A -P
-P -Y.

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At 00:00:51,650, Character said: Today's the day, then?

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At 00:00:52,910, Character said: Yes.

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At 00:00:54,630, Character said: Cigarette.

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At 00:00:55,970, Character said: Should I, before an operation? Go on,
take it. They won't mind.

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At 00:00:59,110, Character said: Thanks.

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At 00:01:02,890, Character said: Even the condemned man has a last
cigarette.

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At 00:01:06,390, Character said: Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear.

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At 00:01:08,430, Character said: What's the matter? Red in the morning,
shepherd's warning.

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At 00:01:10,970, Character said: Will you shut up?

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At 00:01:12,730, Character said: Are you nervous?

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At 00:01:13,710, Character said: Of course he's not nervous.

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At 00:01:15,050, Character said: No, I'm not nervous.

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At 00:01:19,630, Character said: Of course you're not nervous.

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At 00:01:20,890, Character said: No, I'm not.

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At 00:01:21,750, Character said: Don't tell me you're not nervous. You
g***t out of bed and prayed three times

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At 00:01:24,890, Character said: night. No, I didn't. I was looking for
my cufflinks. Why?

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At 00:01:27,970, Character said: You won't be going anywhere, not for a
long time.

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At 00:01:30,310, Character said: I don't care. I'm not nervous.

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At 00:01:32,190, Character said: I know I'm in good hands. You mean
Thorpe. Do me a favour. He won't be any

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At 00:01:36,490, Character said: till he gets the right glasses.

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At 00:01:37,990, Character said: He's a very good surgeon. I've been
speaking to some of his patients. They

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At 00:01:40,890, Character said: say the same. Well, of course they do.

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At 00:01:42,770, Character said: They're not going to fall out with him,
are they? They might have to go back.

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At 00:01:45,650, Character said: Don't forget.

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At 00:01:46,750, Character said: He's g***t the only job where they can
scar you for life and get away with it.

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At 00:01:50,110, Character said: Don't take any notice, Norman. I'm sure
you've no need to worry. I know Thorpe's

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At 00:01:54,090, Character said: a bit, uh... Well, a bit, um... Loony?

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At 00:01:57,310, Character said: Harrest! He carries a great deal of
responsibility.

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At 00:02:00,270, Character said: But once he gets you in there, he's very
professional.

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At 00:02:02,710, Character said: Oh, did you hear that? Isn't it amazing
how the middle classes stick together,

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At 00:02:06,810, Character said: eh? Of course he's very professional
with them. He gets the best silver out.

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At 00:02:10,330, Character said: They don't get any rusty scalpels. Soon
have you out again playing golf, old

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At 00:02:14,090, Character said: chap. Pip -pip. Different for us.

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At 00:02:16,510, Character said: It's all cut and thrust.

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At 00:02:17,810, Character said: It hasn't done you any harm, Figgis.

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At 00:02:21,310, Character said: That's only because of my natural
resistance, my working -class ability to

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At 00:02:25,230, Character said: endure pain and suffering.

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At 00:02:27,310, Character said: What do you mean?

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At 00:02:28,970, Character said: They're to carry you down there kicking
and screaming.

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At 00:02:32,050, Character said: You can't stand pain.

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At 00:02:33,630, Character said: You can't even stand the sight of blood.

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At 00:02:35,530, Character said: Look what happened when they brought
that chap in with a gashed arm.

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At 00:02:37,810, Character said: He had to get off the stretcher to make
room for you.

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At 00:02:41,470, Character said: Where's your stiff upper lip, Figgis?
I've chewed it away, mate, like everyone

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At 00:02:44,830, Character said: else around here.

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At 00:02:46,280, Character said: Well, I'm not worried. Mother thinks Dr
Thorpe's wonderful.

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At 00:02:49,120, Character said: She says he's g***t a gift for healing.
He's g***t what?

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At 00:02:52,380, Character said: She says he has made the thick walk.

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At 00:02:54,680, Character said: Oh, no, he's made a few of them run
before now.

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At 00:02:57,040, Character said: Well,

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At 00:02:58,640, Character said: he did a very good job with me.

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At 00:03:00,500, Character said: He removed my appendix as clean as a
whistle.

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At 00:03:03,160, Character said: Not much of a scar, either. Mark you
with a body like this, he knew he had to

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At 00:03:06,460, Character said: careful.

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At 00:03:07,620, Character said: Yes, he carried it out with absolute
precision.

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At 00:03:10,060, Character said: You can hardly call it precision,
Archie. You went in there with chest

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At 00:03:14,800, Character said: Well, that was an administrative
blunder, not his fault. Anyway, it

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At 00:03:17,600, Character said: doing. He told me it was full of
dangerous bacteria.

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At 00:03:20,980, Character said: Dangerous bacteria. Don't call a few
great pips dangerous bacteria.

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At 00:03:24,940, Character said: I still say he did an excellent job.

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At 00:03:27,380, Character said: Yeah, well, that was on Wednesday,
wasn't it?

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At 00:03:29,180, Character said: This is Monday.

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At 00:03:30,360, Character said: What's that g***t to do with it? He's
useless on Mondays. He always is when

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At 00:03:33,540, Character said: been out with that Gilbert and Sullivan
crowd.

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At 00:03:35,660, Character said: I don't see any harm in that. Don't you?

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At 00:03:38,080, Character said: Do you know what they call them in the
Red Lion? The Wild Bunch.

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At 00:03:41,600, Character said: They g***t thrown out last week for
singing She's Gonna Manage Yum Yum 63

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At 00:03:46,100, Character said: No, you'd have been better off on a
Wednesday.

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At 00:03:48,500, Character said: Tuesday's just picking up.

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At 00:03:49,900, Character said: Thursday's thinking about the weekend
again.

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At 00:03:51,640, Character said: Mind you, with your appendix, you do
have an advantage.

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At 00:03:54,540, Character said: What's that? There's only one of them.
He usually gets confused when he has two

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At 00:03:57,240, Character said: to choose from.

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At 00:03:58,040, Character said: Will you shut up, Figgis? Can't you see
you're upsetting Norman? No, he's not.

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At 00:04:01,920, Character said: I'm quite calm.

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At 00:04:03,080, Character said: I know my life's in their hands, but I
trust them.

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At 00:04:06,270, Character said: They're decent, kindly people, and
they're going to do their best for me.

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At 00:04:10,830, Character said: Norman, will you come to the office,
please?

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At 00:04:13,110, Character said: There's been another c***k -up.

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At 00:04:15,650, Character said: Monday, Monday, everything is going
wrong.

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At 00:04:18,470, Character said: I wonder what it can be.

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At 00:04:20,089, Character said: We've lost the key to the poison
cupboard again.

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At 00:04:29,870, Character said: You've not signed the form.

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At 00:04:31,390, Character said: What is it?

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At 00:04:32,430, Character said: A consent form for the operation.

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At 00:04:33,830, Character said: Why didn't you say you had not signed
it? I didn't know it was important.

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At 00:04:36,810, Character said: Of course it's important. If something
went wrong, where would we be? In the

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At 00:04:40,130, Character said: fertilizer.

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At 00:04:43,510, Character said: I'd better sign it. Yes.

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At 00:04:46,570, Character said: What's going to go wrong?

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At 00:04:48,430, Character said: Wrong?

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At 00:04:49,770, Character said: Nothing is going to go wrong, Norman.

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At 00:04:52,010, Character said: The chances of something going wrong
are... Thank goodness, the chances of

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At 00:04:56,450, Character said: something going wrong are just...
Astronomical?

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At 00:04:59,790, Character said: One thousand to one.

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At 00:05:01,350, Character said: Good. Thousand to one?

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At 00:05:07,780, Character said: Supposing I'm the one?

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At 00:05:09,940, Character said: You will not be the one. It is one
thousand to one that you will be the

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At 00:05:13,900, Character said: suppose I **?

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At 00:05:15,240, Character said: Then everything will be fine because you
are signing the form.

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At 00:05:18,740, Character said: Well, that won't do me much good. Please
sign the paper.

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At 00:05:22,100, Character said: Mr. Thorpe is a very good man. Nothing
will go wrong.

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At 00:05:25,860, Character said: Yes.

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At 00:05:27,040, Character said: Yes, I like the way he always comes in
singing.

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At 00:05:30,600, Character said: He's... Full of beans, isn't he?

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At 00:05:35,320, Character said: Good morning, Doctor.

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At 00:05:37,180, Character said: Just signing my form.

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At 00:05:40,300, Character said: Yes, well, don't rustle the paper, old
chap. I've g***t a blinding headache.

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At 00:05:45,360, Character said: It's for my operation.

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At 00:05:47,000, Character said: Oh, yes, I was forgetting. How are you
feeling?

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At 00:05:49,460, Character said: I feel all right.

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At 00:05:50,440, Character said: Good. I'm glad one of us does. I feel
like death.

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At 00:05:54,500, Character said: What have you done to your face, Doctor?

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At 00:05:56,520, Character said: Oh, the ad. Cut myself shaving.

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At 00:05:59,950, Character said: Look at those eyes, Gupta. Look at the
whites.

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At 00:06:03,430, Character said: Oh, dear, yes.

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At 00:06:04,970, Character said: They look like a couple of poached eggs.

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At 00:06:07,770, Character said: I'm not surprised. What a night we had
last night.

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At 00:06:10,650, Character said: Would you like a cup of coffee? Yes,
that should stop the hands shaking.

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At 00:06:16,370, Character said: What a morning.

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At 00:06:17,450, Character said: Ever had one of those days, Norman, when
you know everything is going to go

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At 00:06:20,610, Character said: wrong?

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At 00:06:22,030, Character said: Late getting up, couldn't get into the
bathroom. My son was in there trying to

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At 00:06:26,230, Character said: turn himself into Dracula again.

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At 00:06:28,760, Character said: Don't know why he...