Modern Family S10E06 On the Same Paige Subtitles

At 00:00:05,239, Character said: I don't remember buying

2
At 00:00:06,507, Character said: these fresh peaches.

3
At 00:00:08,542, Character said: Aah!

4
At 00:00:09,910, Character said: Apologies, Serge.

5
At 00:00:11,345, Character said: My wife, Claire,
seems to have forgotten

6
At 00:00:12,880, Character said: that I'm holding office hours

7
At 00:00:14,215, Character said: for my Intro to Real Estate
class here at home.

8
At 00:00:16,417, Character said: So, when I walked
to the laundry room

9
At 00:00:18,519, Character said: 10 minutes ago in my bra...

10
At 00:00:19,720, Character said: That was kind of
perfect, actually.

11
At 00:00:20,788, Character said: I had just made a point

12
At 00:00:22,056, Character said: about how buildings
from the early '70s

13
At 00:00:23,691, Character said: were holding up
surprisingly well.

14
At 00:00:25,626, Character said: So maybe I'll...

15
At 00:00:26,760, Character said: Yeah.
Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.

16
At 00:00:28,062, Character said: All right,
see you in class, buddy.

17
At 00:00:30,131, Character said: What a great kid.

18
At 00:00:32,600, Character said: That's why I chucked it all for
a life in academia, Claire.

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At 00:00:34,868, Character said: It's a special feeling

20
At 00:00:36,937, Character said: knowing that there's a young man
walking around out there

21
At 00:00:39,240, Character said: who you helped mold,
who you can be proud of.

22
At 00:00:41,875, Character said: Hey, Dad.
Hey. You know?

23
At 00:00:44,778, Character said: You're up early.

24
At 00:00:46,314, Character said: What are you talking about?

25
At 00:00:47,381, Character said: I hugged you
from behind earlier.

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At 00:00:49,117, Character said: You know, I said, "I don't
remember buying this six pack."

27
At 00:00:51,785, Character said: Then you did that funny
Eastern European accent...

28
At 00:00:54,288, Character said: "I don't want trouble.

29
At 00:00:55,323, Character said: I just want to learn."

30
At 00:00:57,091, Character said: Should we be concerned
about group-molesting Serge?

31
At 00:01:00,128, Character said: And aren't you at the minimum
number of students

32
At 00:01:01,962, Character said: before they cancel
your class?
Not to worry.

33
At 00:01:03,764, Character said: Serge worships me, and the rest
of the class is super solid.

34
At 00:01:06,267, Character said: Plus, it's the last day
to drop classes anyway.

35
At 00:01:08,236, Character said: Oh, speaking of that,

36
At 00:01:09,270, Character said: I'm thinking about
dropping history.

37
At 00:01:10,638, Character said: How come?
It's not really exciting me.

38
At 00:01:12,906, Character said: Plus, we've g***t
this huge paper due today

39
At 00:01:14,775, Character said: that I haven't quite
finished starting.

40
At 00:01:16,410, Character said: It's on the Monroe Doctrine.

41
At 00:01:18,446, Character said: The Monroe Doctrine?

42
At 00:01:20,581, Character said: Oh, no.

43
At 00:01:21,749, Character said: Junior year history class,

44
At 00:01:23,651, Character said: I wrote the perfect paper.

45
At 00:01:25,619, Character said: Strong thesis,
impeccable supporting arguments.

46
At 00:01:28,489, Character said: I quoted from the letters
of a White House footman

47
At 00:01:31,125, Character said: who recalled Monroe
calling to him from the bath,

48
At 00:01:33,427, Character said: "Beauregard,
fetch me my breeches.

49
At 00:01:35,929, Character said: We have a doctrine!"

50
At 00:01:37,665, Character said: I g***t a "C."

51
At 00:01:41,935, Character said: Oh, so you agree
with that grade, huh?

52
At 00:01:44,605, Character said: Don't patronize me.

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At 00:01:47,708, Character said: Captions by VITAC...

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At 00:01:55,716, Character said: ♪♪

55
At 00:02:02,156, Character said: Mmm. The food
at the club

56
At 00:02:03,324, Character said: has gotten so much
lighter and healthier.

57
At 00:02:04,325, Character said: We had a run of angina attacks,

58
At 00:02:05,559, Character said: so we had to go heart-healthy.

59
At 00:02:07,295, Character said: We said goodbye to
our social chairman, Herb,

60
At 00:02:09,530, Character said: and our butter fountain
in the same weekend.

61
At 00:02:11,532, Character said: Oh, I'm sorry.

62
At 00:02:12,966, Character said: Hey, Mr. Pritchett.

63
At 00:02:14,001, Character said: I'll take this
when you're ready.

64
At 00:02:15,002, Character said: Thank you, Maria.
Oh, Maria,

65
At 00:02:16,970, Character said: that's a beautiful name.
That's why it's often sung.

66
At 00:02:18,839, Character said: But you're not going to...

67
At 00:02:19,873, Character said: ♪ Ave Maria

68
At 00:02:22,676, Character said: And curtain. Okay, they just
started letting gays in here.

69
At 00:02:24,912, Character said: Don't make them regret it.

70
At 00:02:25,913, Character said: You might also
wanna tell Sharona

71
At 00:02:27,548, Character said: to steer clear
of the table.
Yes.

72
At 00:02:29,350, Character said: Yeah, well, I should
probably save my energy

73
At 00:02:31,352, Character said: for my performance
tonight anyway.

74
At 00:02:32,986, Character said: Oh, darn. Gloria and I
have tickets to, um...

75
At 00:02:35,556, Character said: Um...

76
At 00:02:37,358, Character said: Don't worry, Jay.
It's... It's not for you.

77
At 00:02:39,227, Character said: Oh, good. I didn't know where
I was going with that.

78
At 00:02:40,894, Character said: Tonight is a fundraiser
at Lily's school.

79
At 00:02:43,497, Character said: We're, you know,
raising money for the kids.

80
At 00:02:45,433, Character said: A night of song and sketch.

81
At 00:02:47,501, Character said: All the dads
are performing. Well...

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At 00:02:49,937, Character said: most of the dads.

83
At 00:02:50,938, Character said: Proud of you, son.

84
At 00:02:51,939, Character said: Ah, it's not a complete victory.

85
At 00:02:53,341, Character said: I still have to watch it, so...

86
At 00:02:55,376, Character said: Thanks for
breakfast, Dad.
Hey,

87
At 00:02:57,077, Character said: I love spending time
with you two!

88
At 00:02:58,912, Character said: Every month I've gotta burn off
a minimum at the club,

89
At 00:03:01,849, Character said: and literally,
everybody else I knew was busy.

90
At 00:03:04,752, Character said: That's also why I give
a lot of birthday presents

91
At 00:03:06,687, Character said: from the pro-shop.
You know, mugs

92
At 00:03:08,021, Character said: and visors that say
"Kiss My Putter,"

93
At 00:03:10,591, Character said: "Talk Birdie To Me."

94
At 00:03:12,125, Character said: Quality items. Everybody wins.

95
At 00:03:15,296, Character said: So, if you're not rushed,

96
At 00:03:16,630, Character said: you should treat yourself
to our spa.

97
At 00:03:18,399, Character said: You know, get a couple of, uh...

98
At 00:03:20,734, Character said: a couple of standard treatments.

99
At 00:03:23,103, Character said: Oh, well, you're so generous.

100
At 00:03:25,439, Character said: Might I say you look
very handsome

101
At 00:03:27,541, Character said: in that shirt
we gave you for Christmas.

102
At 00:03:29,743, Character said: They also make it in
"Queen's coral"... oh, no.

103
At 00:03:32,546, Character said: Did I spoil your birthday?
Sounds like you might.

104
At 00:03:35,949, Character said: Oh.

105
At 00:03:37,951, Character said: What's so funny?
Oh, it's just that

106
At 00:03:39,753, Character said: I've been e-mailing
this mom at school.

107
At 00:03:41,322, Character said: We both volunteer together.

108
At 00:03:42,756, Character said: You... You e-mail?
It's harmless. Listen.

109
At 00:03:45,259, Character said: "Hey, Jay, enjoyed laughing
around the planetarium with you.

110
At 00:03:48,462, Character said: Your jokes were
out of this world."

111
At 00:03:50,264, Character said: Hm, okay.
So, if it's so harmless,

112
At 00:03:52,600, Character said: I'm sure Gloria knows
about this flirty quipstress.

113
At 00:03:55,068, Character said: Don't make something
out of this.

114
At 00:03:57,070, Character said: Oh, my God.
Oh!

115
At 00:03:58,339, Character said: That's why he's
wearing the shirt.

116
At 00:03:59,773, Character said: Because it makes
your blue eyes pop.

117
At 00:04:02,175, Character said: I'm not letting you magpies
dirty this up.

118
At 00:04:05,746, Character said: Oh, uh...

119
At 00:04:06,814, Character said: "Park by the swings

120
At 00:04:08,015, Character said: so I can help you
carry stuff in."

121
At 00:04:09,817, Character said: "Park by the swings

122
At 00:04:11,151, Character said: so I can help you
carry stuff in."

123
At 00:04:13,421, Character said: You're sullying this,
and I'm leaving!

124
At 00:04:15,423, Character said: Okay, well, say "hi"
to your girlfriend.
She's not my girlfriend.

125
At 00:04:17,458, Character said: The only reason
we're paired together

126
At 00:04:18,826, Character said: is because our kids are
in the same reading group.

127
At 00:04:19,927, Character said: Oo-ooh!

128
At 00:04:21,329, Character said: D***n it!

129
At 00:04:23,096, Character said: I love when we "ooh."

130
At 00:04:24,332, Character said: We used to do that all the time,
and then we stopped.

131
At 00:04:26,434, Character said: Why?
I don't know.

132
At 00:04:29,637, Character said: Joe!

133
At 00:04:32,272, Character said: Why did I find your eye patch

134
At 00:04:34,107, Character said: in the garbage?
I don't know.

135
At 00:04:36,143, Character said: Were you throwing away
another parking ticket?

136
At 00:04:38,346, Character said: Okay, you have to put it on.

137
At 00:04:39,980, Character said: Why?
My lazy eye is fixed.

138
At 00:04:42,182, Character said: Okay, I'm over here,

139...