Down and Dirty Duck (1974) Charles Swenson.en Subtitles

00:00:00,031 --> 00:00:02,(rock music)

00:00:34,213 --> 00:00:36,(upbeat music)

00:00:36,859 --> 00:00:39,(horse whinnying)

00:00:39,599 --> 00:00:42,(upbeat music)

00:00:47,059 --> 00:00:49,(car honking)

00:00:51,080 --> 00:00:53,- Aw, thank you ever so much for watching

00:00:53,288 --> 00:00:55,another fine late night feature.

00:00:55,862 --> 00:00:59,I hope you enjoyed watching
as much as we enjoyed

00:00:59,480 --> 00:01:00,showing it to you.

00:01:00,319 --> 00:01:01,Right, Lightening?

00:01:01,240 --> 00:01:05,Oh sure, Lightening enjoyed
showing it to you, too.

00:01:05,070 --> 00:01:06,(laughing)

00:01:06,849 --> 00:01:07,(gun bangs)

00:01:07,947 --> 00:01:11,You be sure and tune in
tomorrow for our action-packed

00:01:11,239 --> 00:01:15,late night movie, Dirty Duck.

00:01:15,190 --> 00:01:17,(screaming)

00:01:18,613 --> 00:01:23,(laughing) Now this is a
story of a big dime insurance

00:01:23,670 --> 00:01:27,man gone berserk on a rampage of rape,

00:01:27,859 --> 00:01:29,murder, and mayhem.

00:01:29,970 --> 00:01:34,Oh, it's gonna be a nasty one,
so you be sure to watch it.

00:01:34,124 --> 00:01:36,Lightening and I will be watching it.

00:01:36,390 --> 00:01:38,And now, good night, folks.

00:01:38,367 --> 00:01:39,See ya tomorrow.

00:01:39,780 --> 00:01:40,Right, Lightening?

00:01:40,613 --> 00:01:42,Now don't make--
(loud screeching)

00:01:42,847 --> 00:01:44,Don't make an old lady like--

00:01:44,470 --> 00:01:47,Oh, (faint speaking).

00:01:47,128 --> 00:01:48,(woman screaming)
(gun bangs)

00:01:48,366 --> 00:01:50,He says right too, folks (laughing).

00:01:50,286 --> 00:01:52,(piano music)

00:01:57,726 --> 00:02:00,(upbeat music)

00:02:02,170 --> 00:02:04,- [Willard] I don't prize the word cheap.

00:02:04,116 --> 00:02:08,It's just not a word of hope,
it's not a word of cheer, huh?

00:02:08,020 --> 00:02:11,It is the badge of poverty,

00:02:11,250 --> 00:02:13,the signal of distress, huh?

00:02:13,140 --> 00:02:15,Cheap service means cheap mean

00:02:15,560 --> 00:02:18,and cheap men mean a cheap country.

00:02:18,518 --> 00:02:23,- [Announcer] William
McKinley, 24th president

00:02:23,660 --> 00:02:28,of the United States was shot in the back

00:02:28,820 --> 00:02:33,by an assassin with a cheap hand gun.

00:02:34,778 --> 00:02:35,Bang.

00:02:45,080 --> 00:02:47,(rock music)

00:02:50,271 --> 00:02:53,♪ Now this is a cheap little movie ♪

00:02:53,355 --> 00:02:58,♪ And I ** a cheap little guy ♪

00:02:59,240 --> 00:03:04,♪ I'm going to abuse your eardrums ♪

00:03:04,396 --> 00:03:09,♪ I'm going to make fun of your eyes ♪

00:03:10,750 --> 00:03:15,♪ This old movie is a great
big pile of shame, yeah ♪

00:03:19,768 --> 00:03:21,♪ But I'm glad to be with it ♪

00:03:21,614 --> 00:03:26,♪ And I'm proud to be a part of it ♪

00:03:26,233 --> 00:03:30,♪ Oh yeah, oh yeah ♪

00:03:30,746 --> 00:03:35,♪ Oh yeah, oh yeah ♪

00:03:36,744 --> 00:03:39,♪ It's great to have work in a movie ♪

00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:44,♪ It's great to have something to eat ♪

00:03:44,823 --> 00:03:47,♪ Eat ♪

00:03:47,056 --> 00:03:51,♪ I could just be out doing sessions ♪

00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:56,♪ Like all of the dots in the street ♪

00:03:57,373 --> 00:04:00,♪ It's true you may never understand ♪

00:04:00,830 --> 00:04:05,♪ What this film's about, yeah ♪

00:04:06,645 --> 00:04:08,♪ But I'm the guy singing ♪

00:04:08,517 --> 00:04:13,♪ And you're the dope
who paid to find out ♪

00:04:13,331 --> 00:04:14,♪ Oh yeah, oh yeah ♪

00:04:14,997 --> 00:04:17,♪ Oh yeah, oh yeah ♪

00:04:17,496 --> 00:04:22,♪ Oh yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

00:04:25,115 --> 00:04:26,♪ It's so cheap ♪

00:04:26,860 --> 00:04:31,♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

00:04:32,229 --> 00:04:35,♪ Yeah, it's so cheap ♪

00:04:35,925 --> 00:04:38,♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

00:04:39,318 --> 00:04:41,(lamp clicking)

00:04:41,691 --> 00:04:44,♪ Yeah, it's so cheap ♪

00:04:44,964 --> 00:04:47,(soft music)

00:04:56,475 --> 00:04:58,- Willard, wake up!

00:05:00,707 --> 00:05:02,This is the day.

00:05:03,080 --> 00:05:05,(soft music)

00:05:08,814 --> 00:05:10,(yawning)

00:05:14,557 --> 00:05:16,- Oh, this is the day.

00:05:18,397 --> 00:05:20,(rock music)

00:05:22,309 --> 00:05:25,♪ Wake up, it's a beautiful morning ♪

00:05:25,256 --> 00:05:29,♪ Everything good is coming your way ♪

00:05:29,496 --> 00:05:33,♪ Big smiles and sunshine ♪

00:05:33,314 --> 00:05:36,♪ And often been showing
how it's going today ♪

00:05:36,846 --> 00:05:39,♪ You know, you better be there ♪

00:05:39,464 --> 00:05:41,♪ Tonight, I'll see ya in Belize ♪

00:05:41,667 --> 00:05:45,♪ 'Cause it doesn't matter now ♪

00:05:45,138 --> 00:05:47,♪ This is the day that,
you said it's the way ♪

00:05:47,549 --> 00:05:52,♪ That you know it's better here ♪

00:05:54,192 --> 00:05:57,♪ Whoa, it seems so amazing ♪

00:05:57,450 --> 00:05:59,♪ The feelings you feeling ♪

00:05:59,485 --> 00:06:01,♪ Seem to flow naturally ♪

00:06:01,354 --> 00:06:04,♪ And Willard, it's elementary ♪

00:06:04,804 --> 00:06:08,♪ When she smiles at you, it
bet you smile back at me ♪

00:06:08,602 --> 00:06:11,♪ So don't you try too hard. ♪

00:06:11,687 --> 00:06:15,♪ You're about to cover
just the way you are ♪

00:06:15,069 --> 00:06:17,♪ Now I'm sure you made ♪

00:06:17,583 --> 00:06:21,♪ You gotta find the
things she can't forget ♪

00:06:21,263 --> 00:06:23,♪ No matter how she tries ♪

00:06:23,128 --> 00:06:26,♪ It's hard to describe
her feelings inside ♪

00:06:26,324 --> 00:06:28,♪ When she looks in your eyes ♪

00:06:28,660 --> 00:06:30,♪ And tells you her lies ♪

00:06:30,402 --> 00:06:32,♪ The love in your eyes ♪

00:06:32,362 --> 00:06:33,♪ She loves when her thighs ♪

00:06:33,833 --> 00:06:37,♪ Just how happy these could be ♪

00:06:37,720 --> 00:06:42,♪ This could be the day ♪
- This is the day.

00:06:44,220 --> 00:06:45,I'll do it!

00:06:45,673 --> 00:06:47,♪ The day, the day ♪

00:06:47,846 --> 00:06:50,♪ This could be the day ♪

00:06:50,050 --> 00:06:51,- I'll do it, yeah.

00:06:55,367 --> 00:06:58,I know it's the day, I
can feel it's the day.

00:07:00,610 --> 00:07:02,This is the day I'll do it.

00:07:02,763 --> 00:07:03,(farting)

00:07:03,596 --> 00:07:06,(alarm ringing)

00:07:07,235 --> 00:07:09,(gun bangs)

00:07:11,515 --> 00:07:12,- Yes, Daisy.

00:07:12,419 --> 00:07:14,I'm coming!

00:07:14,020 --> 00:07:15,Oh now, don't get upset.

00:07:15,950 --> 00:07:17,I'm coming, dearie.

00:07:17,715 --> 00:07:19,Oh, that's a good kitty.

00:07:20,738 --> 00:07:23,- Oh, oh, excuse me.

00:07:23,410 --> 00:07:25,- Oh, good morning, Willard!

00:07:25,699 --> 00:07:28,- I'm gonna really do it today

00:07:28,637 --> 00:07:30,- Do it?

00:07:30,375 --> 00:07:31,- Yes, ma'**.

00:07:31,953 --> 00:07:33,- Do what?

00:07:33,454 --> 00:07:35,- Ask her out today.

00:07:35,848 --> 00:07:39,Today, I'm gonna ask her to marry me.

00:07:39,940 --> 00:07:41,- Oh, buy Willard!

00:07:41,747 --> 00:07:45,You haven't even spoken to her before.

00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:47,- I know, but today is the day.

00:07:48,673 --> 00:07:50,(meowing)

00:07:50,670 --> 00:07:52,I knew it for sure when
I was sitting on the--

00:07:52,277 --> 00:07:54,Ooh!
- Well, you shouldn't rush

00:07:54,883 --> 00:07:57,those things, you know.
(cat yelping)

00:07:57,190 --> 00:08:01,- Yes, ma'**, I know, but
it thought about this one

00:08:01,350 --> 00:08:02,a long time.

00:08:02,183 --> 00:08:04,- Oh, but Willard, she
just started working

00:08:04,760 --> 00:08:06,with you this week.

00:08:06,140 --> 00:08:09,- Well sometimes,
sometimes a week is enough.

00:08:09,813 --> 00:08:11,- But it's only Tuesday!

00:08:14,919 --> 00:08:17,(upbeat music)

00:08:38,299 --> 00:08:41,(car engine choking)

00:08:45,344 --> 00:08:47,(rock music)

00:08:52,442 --> 00:08:53,(door slamming)

00:08:53,725 --> 00:08:54,(rock music)

00:08:54,944 --> 00:08:56,(loud banging)

00:08:56,566 --> 00:08:58,(rock music)

00:09:01,252 --> 00:09:04,(loud crunching)

00:09:05,007 --> 00:09:09,- It's only Tuesday!
- Yeah, it won't start.

00:09:09,191 --> 00:09:12,- It looks fine.
- But it won't start.

00:09:12,812 --> 00:09:15,(cat yelping)
- Oh Jaysie, be careful!

00:09:15,083 --> 00:09:18,You almost hurt poor
Willard and he's such a nice

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