Newhart S02E09 Subtitles

At 00:01:08,435, Character said: - Stephanie?
If you're not busy,

2
At 00:01:10,737, Character said: could you come in here
for a minute?

3
At 00:01:12,639, Character said: - Well, I was busy,
but that's okay.

4
At 00:01:15,476, Character said: What do you want?

5
At 00:01:16,710, Character said: - I have something
for you.

6
At 00:01:17,978, Character said: - What?
- Your first paycheck.

7
At 00:01:20,013, Character said: - [ gasps ]
Oh, boy. Fantastic.

8
At 00:01:22,916, Character said: - Oh, your nails
are still wet.

9
At 00:01:24,084, Character said: Do you want me
to open it for you?

10
At 00:01:25,085, Character said: - No, no. That's okay.

11
At 00:01:29,789, Character said: $437.

12
At 00:01:32,626, Character said: Well.
Guess it'll be good for me

13
At 00:01:36,463, Character said: to try to get by on this
every week.

14
At 00:01:38,332, Character said: - Stephanie,
that's not a weekly check.

15
At 00:01:40,934, Character said: That's a monthly check.

16
At 00:01:44,238, Character said: - $437 a month?

17
At 00:01:46,507, Character said: - Well, that's after taxes.

18
At 00:01:48,342, Character said: And, of course,
we pay for your room

19
At 00:01:50,677, Character said: and all your meals,

20
At 00:01:51,778, Character said: so that $437
is just free and clear

21
At 00:01:54,515, Character said: to do anything you want.

22
At 00:01:55,616, Character said: - Yeah.

23
At 00:01:59,019, Character said: I'm just trying to think
what that could be.

24
At 00:02:03,690, Character said: - Joanna?
- Yes, George.

25
At 00:02:05,091, Character said: - Did you order something
from a sporting goods store?

26
At 00:02:07,628, Character said: - Oh, great. Is it here?
- Yeah.

27
At 00:02:09,530, Character said: - What did you order?
- A surprise for D***k.

28
At 00:02:12,866, Character said: - [ gasps ]
Oh, neat.

29
At 00:02:14,968, Character said: - Here. I'll take this.

30
At 00:02:16,603, Character said: - All right, just put it down
over there, will you?

31
At 00:02:18,872, Character said: And let me give you
something for your trouble.

32
At 00:02:21,375, Character said: - Oh, that won't be necessary.

33
At 00:02:25,646, Character said: - George, I meant
this gentleman.

34
At 00:02:28,282, Character said: - Did you want me
to get D***k?

35
At 00:02:29,749, Character said: - Would you?
Oh, I hope he likes it.

36
At 00:02:31,418, Character said: - Yeah. Me, too.

37
At 00:02:33,987, Character said: - D***k? Could you come
out here for a minute?

38
At 00:02:36,657, Character said: - Here, let's stand
in front of it

39
At 00:02:38,124, Character said: so he won't see it
when he first comes out.

40
At 00:02:44,598, Character said: - Surprise!

41
At 00:02:47,834, Character said: - Oh, wow.

42
At 00:02:51,838, Character said: - Do you know what it is?

43
At 00:02:54,107, Character said: - Most of a bike.

44
At 00:02:57,344, Character said: - It's an exercise bike.

45
At 00:02:59,079, Character said: I saw it in the store,

46
At 00:03:00,414, Character said: and I thought it would be
perfect for your study.

47
At 00:03:02,482, Character said: You can use it when you
take a break from writing.

48
At 00:03:06,019, Character said: You don't like it, do you?

49
At 00:03:07,354, Character said: - No, no. Sure I do.

50
At 00:03:08,922, Character said: It'll be perfect
in the study.

51
At 00:03:10,691, Character said: Even if I'm not
exercising on it,

52
At 00:03:12,759, Character said: I'll still get
a lot of exercise...

53
At 00:03:15,529, Character said: trying to walk around it.

54
At 00:03:18,732, Character said: - Hey, whose exercise bike?

55
At 00:03:20,934, Character said: - Uh, mine.

56
At 00:03:23,437, Character said: - Boy, Marjorie and I
had one of these.

57
At 00:03:25,939, Character said: We were going to tone up
and firm up.

58
At 00:03:28,408, Character said: And then, of course,
we broke up.

59
At 00:03:32,546, Character said: - Get on it. See how it works.

60
At 00:03:34,448, Character said: - Yeah, honey. Come on.
- Okay.

61
At 00:03:41,455, Character said: Boy, oh, boy, that, uh...

62
At 00:03:48,061, Character said: it really gets the old
blood flowing, doesn't it?

63
At 00:03:52,132, Character said: - I-- I don't understand.

64
At 00:03:53,300, Character said: Why didn't you just
get a whole bike?

65
At 00:03:55,669, Character said: - Well, you can only
ride a bike

66
At 00:03:57,271, Character said: when the weather's nice.

67
At 00:03:58,905, Character said: You can ride this
24 hours a day,

68
At 00:04:00,707, Character said: 365 days a year.

69
At 00:04:02,976, Character said: - Isn't that great?

70
At 00:04:06,680, Character said: - Ohh. What a great
exercise bike.

71
At 00:04:11,184, Character said: Yours?
- Yeah.

72
At 00:04:12,653, Character said: - You'll never use it.
- He will, too.

73
At 00:04:14,655, Character said: - You bought it, right?

74
At 00:04:15,656, Character said: - Ohh! What do you
want, Kirk?

75
At 00:04:17,658, Character said: - Okay, listen up,
everybody.

76
At 00:04:18,858, Character said: I have an announcement
to make.

77
At 00:04:20,527, Character said: I'm starting
a singles club.

78
At 00:04:22,462, Character said: - Really?
- Yeah, right here at the inn.

79
At 00:04:24,464, Character said: - What are you talking about?

80
At 00:04:25,632, Character said: You're not having
a singles club here.

81
At 00:04:26,900, Character said: - Why not?

82
At 00:04:28,368, Character said: You let the Rotary Club
meet here

83
At 00:04:30,036, Character said: and the Junior
Chamber of Commerce.

84
At 00:04:31,571, Character said: - That is true, honey.

85
At 00:04:33,206, Character said: - Well, I mean, they're
hardly the same thing.

86
At 00:04:34,708, Character said: I mean, I know him.

87
At 00:04:35,975, Character said: When he says a singles club,
he means mud wrestling.

88
At 00:04:40,246, Character said: - I think a singles club
is a great idea.

89
At 00:04:42,382, Character said: It could help all of us.

90
At 00:04:43,883, Character said: - Not me.
- Oh. Maybe not you,

91
At 00:04:46,820, Character said: but what about
the rest of us?

92
At 00:04:48,054, Character said: I'm single,
George is single,

93
At 00:04:49,323, Character said: Stephanie is single,
Ed's marriage is guano.

94
At 00:04:53,593, Character said: - I'd like to meet
some new people.

95
At 00:04:55,295, Character said: - You know, it's really
not a bad thought.

96
At 00:04:56,896, Character said: - Yeah.
- Kirk, why is it

97
At 00:04:59,333, Character said: whenever you come up
with an idea,

98
At 00:05:00,634, Character said: you always come over here
and dump it on me?

99
At 00:05:03,269, Character said: - Because you're
my best friend.

100
At 00:05:06,172, Character said: - I don't want to be
your best friend.

101
At 00:05:08,375, Character said: - Why are you always
so reluctant to help me?

102
At 00:05:10,410, Character said: - You know, speaking
from personal experience,

103
At 00:05:13,480, Character said: it is hard to meet
people in this town.

104
At 00:05:15,716, Character said: - Yeah. A group like Kirk
is talking about

105
At 00:05:18,385, Character said: would sure make it easier.
- Yeah.

106
At 00:05:20,587, Character said: - Well, I guess if you feel
that strongly about it,

107
At 00:05:22,889, Character said: we can--
we can try it once.

108
At 00:05:24,524, Character said: - Great!

109
At 00:05:25,759, Character said: - See? It's not so hard
to give, is it, D***k?

110
At 00:05:30,063, Character said: Okay, we'll have
our first meeting

111
At 00:05:31,598, Character said: Friday night, 7:00,
in the dining room.

112
At 00:05:33,400, Character said: - Oh. Friday night? I can't.
I have a date.

113
At 00:05:36,436, Character said: - I thought you were having
trouble getting dates.

114
At 00:05:38,338, Character said: - Not in the evenings.

115
At 00:05:50,316, Character said: - Where's Kirk?

116
At 00:05:51,385, Character said: - Isn't he in
with the group?

117
At 00:05:52,652, Character said: - No, and the meeting
was supposed to start

118
At 00:05:54,120, Character said: 20 minutes ago.
- What are they doing?

119
At 00:05:55,822, Character said: - Nothing. They're
just standing around

120
At 00:05:57,090, Character said: like a bunch of penguins
staring at each other.

121
At 00:05:59,659, Character said: I'm going to call him.

122
At 00:06:02,796, Character said: - Hi, guys.

123
At 00:06:06,332, Character said: - Where have you been?

124
At 00:06:07,601, Character said: - This is the first meeting
of my singles club.

125
At 00:06:09,803, Character said: Hey, I'm the host.

126
At 00:06:11,137, Character said: This is potentially
a very important night for me.

127
At 00:06:14,207, Character said: I was gargling.

128
At 00:06:16,510, Character said: - Those people have been
in there for half an hour.

129
At 00:06:18,211, Character said: - Why are you so mad at me?

130
At 00:06:19,713, Character said: - Because this evening
is turning out

131
At 00:06:20,980, Character said: exactly the way
I knew it would.

132
At 00:06:22,449, Character said: You said it was
going to be dignified.

133
At 00:06:23,983, Character said: You show up late,

134
At 00:06:25,385, Character said: and then you have somebody
paint that stupid sign.

135
At 00:06:28,321, Character said: - I didn't have anyone
make that sign.

136
At 00:06:29,790, Character said: I took it out
of the window of my car.

137
At 00:06:35,929, Character said: - Oh. Hi. I just came out

138
At 00:06:37,997, Character said: because some of
the singles were wondering

139
At 00:06:39,966, Character said: if there's going to be
anything to eat or drink.

140
At 00:06:42,135, Character said: -...