The Bernie Mac Show For Whom The Belt Tolls Aac2 0 H 264-squalor S05E07 Subtitles

At 00:00:02,986, Character said: (theme music playing)

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At 00:00:20,554, Character said: Oh!

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At 00:00:21,838, Character said: Hey, America.

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At 00:00:23,566, Character said: Bernie Mac is road-weary.

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At 00:00:26,193, Character said: 12 cities in 14 days.

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At 00:00:28,136, Character said: Long hours, different hotels
every night.

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At 00:00:30,931, Character said: I ** beat.

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At 00:00:32,766, Character said: But one thing traveling does,
America, it makes you appreciate

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At 00:00:36,019, Character said: what's waiting for you
at home, believe me.

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At 00:00:38,188, Character said: JORDAN:
Uncle Bernie! You're back!

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At 00:00:39,648, Character said: We missed you.

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At 00:00:41,166, Character said: Boy, I'm busy.
Don't come in here.

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At 00:00:42,776, Character said: (whistling)

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At 00:00:46,696, Character said: Mmm.

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At 00:00:49,625, Character said: (contented sigh)

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At 00:00:51,701, Character said: Oh, boy.

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At 00:01:05,132, Character said: Somebody's been in my seat.

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At 00:01:18,895, Character said: Them d***n kids.

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At 00:01:22,533, Character said: Wanda!
Yeah?

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At 00:01:23,984, Character said: You let those kids
go in my den?

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At 00:01:25,735, Character said: Wait, wait, wait, hold up.
I didn't let anybody
do anything.

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At 00:01:28,697, Character said: You know what?
They were acting up all
while you were gone, okay?

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At 00:01:32,659, Character said: I mean, I've had to deal with
constant fighting, back talk,

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At 00:01:35,453, Character said: and a small little fire

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At 00:01:37,047, Character said: Jordan may or may not
have started.

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At 00:01:39,249, Character said: Ooh, I ** at the end
of my rope with that boy.

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At 00:01:41,977, Character said: He is totally out of control.

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At 00:01:43,753, Character said: He's out
of control, huh?

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At 00:01:45,380, Character said: You give him the eye?

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At 00:01:47,007, Character said: The eye doesn't
work anymore.

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At 00:01:48,884, Character said: He doesn't listen to me.

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At 00:01:50,111, Character said: Let me see the eye.
Let me see it.

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At 00:01:51,678, Character said: I... Now you're not
listening to me.

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At 00:01:55,098, Character said: Well... All right, then,

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At 00:01:58,185, Character said: I'll deal with the boy
first thing in the morning.

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At 00:01:59,603, Character said: But right now I've
g***t to get me some sleep.

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At 00:02:01,521, Character said: Wait. You sleeping
in the middle
of the day?

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At 00:02:04,250, Character said: What ** I supposed to do?

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At 00:02:05,626, Character said: Wanda, baby,
what you always tell me?

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At 00:02:08,069, Character said: You said the people in your job,
they're just like children.

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At 00:02:11,132, Character said: So use some of that work
tactics here at home.

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At 00:02:13,759, Character said: You're the boss lady.

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At 00:02:15,076, Character said: Crack the whip. Pop it!

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At 00:02:16,929, Character said: (smacks with towel)

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At 00:02:24,419, Character said: Now you know you're not
supposed to watch TV
in your uncle's den.

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At 00:02:27,547, Character said: This is why we gave you
the TV in here.

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At 00:02:29,424, Character said: I can never
get to it.

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At 00:02:30,967, Character said: They're always
in here playing

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At 00:02:32,594, Character said: their stupid
video games.
Nuh-uh!

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At 00:02:34,179, Character said: Vanessa's always
kicking us out

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At 00:02:35,722, Character said: to watch The O.C.

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At 00:02:37,182, Character said: As if!

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At 00:02:38,892, Character said: Well, from now on,

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At 00:02:40,602, Character said: we have this schedule to
determine TV privileges.

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At 00:02:44,865, Character said: Now, as you can see,
you all have equal
viewing time, okay?

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At 00:02:48,526, Character said: This is normalized
by your respective ages

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At 00:02:51,404, Character said: to eliminate
all conflicts.

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At 00:02:53,698, Character said: Any questions?

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At 00:02:55,075, Character said: Yes, one.
Are you serious?

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At 00:02:57,202, Character said: Very.

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At 00:02:58,411, Character said: Look here, Bryana.
It's your hour.

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At 00:03:00,789, Character said: Enjoy.

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At 00:03:02,082, Character said: Ha-ha.

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At 00:03:04,709, Character said: (voices speaking
indistinctly on TV)

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At 00:03:06,544, Character said: MAN (on TV):
(singing indistinctly)

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At 00:03:09,339, Character said: KIDS (on TV):
♪ Aye, aye Captain! ♪

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At 00:03:11,091, Character said: Move.

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At 00:03:13,677, Character said: SINGER:
♪ Let's tighten it up now ♪

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At 00:03:16,096, Character said: ♪ Do the tighten up,
everybody can do it now ♪

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At 00:03:20,242, Character said: ♪ So get to it,
we're gonna tighten up ♪

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At 00:03:23,895, Character said: ♪ Let's do the tighten up,
you can do it now ♪

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At 00:03:27,315, Character said: ♪ So, baby, get to it ♪

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At 00:03:29,442, Character said: ♪ Look to your left now
look to your right ♪

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At 00:03:32,612, Character said: (smashing
and whooshing)
What is all that noise?

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At 00:03:36,241, Character said: (gasps)

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At 00:03:39,911, Character said: Jordan? What are you doing?

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At 00:03:43,623, Character said: Uh... nothing, just trying
to teach myself golf.

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At 00:03:47,627, Character said: You are ruining my club,
and my garden! Ooh!

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At 00:03:52,307, Character said: You're not going to tell
Uncle Bernie, are you?

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At 00:03:54,134, Character said: Boy, you ain't
g***t to worry about

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At 00:03:55,586, Character said: Uncle Bernie,
you need to worry
about me.

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At 00:03:57,470, Character said: Now you replant all
of these flowers,

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At 00:03:59,606, Character said: mister, until you learn
how to respect other
people's property.

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At 00:04:02,317, Character said: Do you understand?

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At 00:04:03,643, Character said: So you're not going
to tell Uncle Bernie?

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At 00:04:05,895, Character said: No, he is sleeping
and you better not
disturb him.

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At 00:04:10,000, Character said: Get to planting.

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At 00:04:12,002, Character said: Oh, whatever you say.

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At 00:04:16,257, Character said: Phew.

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At 00:04:17,657, Character said: (snoring)

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At 00:04:24,039, Character said: GIRL (on TV):
Oh my God,
that's wonderful.

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At 00:04:25,841, Character said: Which one?

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At 00:04:27,584, Character said: What channel did
you say it was on?

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At 00:04:30,628, Character said: (TV channel changes
to funky music)

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At 00:04:32,172, Character said: Hey, I was watching that!

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At 00:04:33,598, Character said: You can have my hour later.

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At 00:04:36,092, Character said: Hmm, nice.

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At 00:04:38,261, Character said: Real nice.

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At 00:04:40,272, Character said: Give me that!

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At 00:04:41,681, Character said: In a minute.

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At 00:04:42,682, Character said: BERNIE:
Keep it down!

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At 00:04:44,017, Character said: Don't let me
come out there!

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At 00:04:45,518, Character said: (hushed)
I've g***t to go.

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At 00:04:46,978, Character said: Bye.

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At 00:04:48,521, Character said: And your hour
is up anyway.

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At 00:04:50,157, Character said: No, it's not.

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At 00:04:51,524, Character said: Let's consult
the schedule.

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At 00:04:52,751, Character said: I said, it's not.

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At 00:04:58,782, Character said: You are so dead!

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At 00:05:00,000, Character said: (hits piano keys)

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At 00:05:06,956, Character said: (muffled grunting)

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At 00:05:14,089, Character said: WANDA:
Isn't that sweet?

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At 00:05:15,590, Character said: My system is working.

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At 00:05:21,554, Character said: ♪ I've g***t the schedule ♪

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At 00:05:24,599, Character said: So?
Give me that!

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At 00:05:26,818, Character said: Come and get it.

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At 00:05:30,438, Character said: (loud thump)

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At 00:05:33,066, Character said: (ominous music playing)

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At 00:05:36,236, Character said: (both whimper)

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At 00:05:37,362, Character said: (loud crash)

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At 00:05:41,717, Character said: You made those kids a schedule
and expect that to work?

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At 00:05:44,795, Character said: You just gave them something
else to fight about.

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At 00:05:47,014, Character said: I didn't know
what else to do.

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At 00:05:48,373, Character said: They don't listen to me.

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At 00:05:50,041, Character said: Wanda, I told you, all you
have to do is stand firm,

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At 00:05:53,145, Character said: stick to your guns.

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At 00:05:54,421, Character said: That's all I do and it works.

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At 00:05:56,056, Character said: That's because
they fear you.

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At 00:05:58,817, Character said: They better!
Because if they don't,

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At 00:06:00,685, Character said: I get Big Mama's belt
and I...

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At 00:06:02,971, Character said: (awkward music playing)

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At 00:06:05,140, Character said: America, if the problem is that
those kids don't fear Wanda,

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At 00:06:10,270, Character said: then don't worry, they will.

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At 00:06:13,189, Character said: I'll see to it myself.

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At 00:06:23,616, Character said: Wanda.
Hmm?

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At 00:06:25,636, Character said: Here, baby,
this is for you.

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At 00:06:27,412, Character said: Ooh.

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At 00:06:28,922, Character said: Isn't this Big
Mama's belt?
Mm-hmm.

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At 00:06:31,040, Character said: My God, was
she a size 40?

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At 00:06:32,592, Character said: No. It's not for wearing.
It's for scaring.

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At 00:06:36,171, Character said: Oh.
You understand that?

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At 00:06:38,423, Character said: You said the kids don't fear
you, now this is the key.

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At 00:06:40,925, Character said: I call this the weapon
of a***s destruction.

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At 00:06:43,887, Character said: Uh, thanks, honey,
but you know what?

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At 00:06:45,430, Character said: The belt, that's
not my...