Newhart s02e08 The Man Who Came Forever Subtitles

00:01:13,230 --> 00:01:16,Did you call D***k? Yeah, he'll be here
in a minute. And I'll get the dinner.

00:01:16,850 --> 00:01:17,Boy, ** I hungry.

00:01:18,150 --> 00:01:21,Me too. You know, I never used to eat
much, but ever since I've been here,

00:01:21,710 --> 00:01:24,been ravenous. Well, it's probably all
the work you've been doing.

00:01:24,750 --> 00:01:26,I guess that's true. I have been busy.

00:01:29,150 --> 00:01:30,Boy, that looks good. I hope so.

00:01:31,770 --> 00:01:35,I never realized how much there was to
do around a place like this until I had

00:01:35,230 --> 00:01:37,to do it. It can wear you out.

00:01:37,670 --> 00:01:39,Oh, boy. Mashed potatoes.

00:01:39,670 --> 00:01:40,I'll get the rolls and gravy.

00:01:41,550 --> 00:01:46,Thanks. I'm just exhausted all the time.
I know what you mean. It never ends.

00:01:48,450 --> 00:01:50,Now, have I forgotten anything?

00:01:50,970 --> 00:01:52,The butter. Right.

00:01:54,070 --> 00:01:58,I don't mind saying I could use a day
off. Who couldn't? But in this business,

00:01:58,310 --> 00:02:00,it's seven days a week, 24 hours a day.

00:02:01,350 --> 00:02:02,Oh, there.

00:02:02,310 --> 00:02:07,That should be everything. Look at this.
Hot roast, vegetables, rolls, homemade

00:02:07,850 --> 00:02:08,gravy.

00:02:09,210 --> 00:02:14,Joanna. Do you think someday when I meet
the right guy and get married that you

00:02:14,030 --> 00:02:17,could teach me to teach whoever I hire
how to cook just like you?

00:02:18,790 --> 00:02:19,Sure.

00:02:21,090 --> 00:02:23,There you are. How's the book coming?
Oh, not fast enough.

00:02:24,250 --> 00:02:27,This is the last time I do a book on
such short notice. I mean, it's

00:02:27,410 --> 00:02:30,to write everything you ever wanted to
know about camping in a week.

00:02:31,030 --> 00:02:32,Just can't be done.

00:02:33,190 --> 00:02:34,Well, I'm sure you'll finish on time.

00:02:34,930 --> 00:02:36,No, it won't, honey. I just told you it
can't be done.

00:02:36,870 --> 00:02:37,Where are you going?

00:02:37,910 --> 00:02:41,Back to work. D***k, I hate to think of
you wolfing down dinner at your desk.

00:02:41,410 --> 00:02:43,Well, wolfing is all I'm going to have
time for tonight.

00:02:43,390 --> 00:02:46,Excuse me. I'm sorry. I don't mean to
interrupt.

00:02:46,530 --> 00:02:50,Can we help you with something? Who do I
see about a room? Me. I guess I'm going

00:02:50,490 --> 00:02:51,that way anyway.

00:02:51,770 --> 00:02:55,I'm not taking you away from your
dinner, ** I? No, you're taking away

00:02:55,850 --> 00:02:57,work. My dinner is right here.

00:02:57,310 --> 00:02:58,I'm sorry.

00:02:59,010 --> 00:03:03,No, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to seem
grumpy. I guess I'm very busy. I'm not

00:03:03,590 --> 00:03:05,completely sure I need a room.

00:03:05,610 --> 00:03:08,I mean, I need a room, but I'm not sure
I need it for the whole night.

00:03:09,410 --> 00:03:10,Oh, I don't mean that the way it sounds.

00:03:11,390 --> 00:03:15,See, I had a little spat with my wife,
and I figured I'd better get out and let

00:03:15,330 --> 00:03:16,things cool off.

00:03:16,970 --> 00:03:18,So that would be a single room?

00:03:18,710 --> 00:03:19,Uh, yeah.

00:03:21,650 --> 00:03:23,First time in 19 years.

00:03:23,710 --> 00:03:26,But it's no big deal. I mean, she's
probably calling all over town for me.

00:03:26,930 --> 00:03:30,She hasn't called here yet. Has she,
Holstead? Marjorie Holstead? No, no, she

00:03:30,610 --> 00:03:34,hasn't. Whether she calls me or I call
her, it's no big deal.

00:03:34,780 --> 00:03:37,Well, there you go, Mr. Halstead. Top of
the stairs, third door on the right.

00:03:37,500 --> 00:03:40,Oh, great. Now, look, I'm going to pay
you now in case she calls and I end up

00:03:40,820 --> 00:03:42,leaving early. How much was it?

00:03:42,460 --> 00:03:46,Thirty -five. Oh, good. Oh, look there.
That's my wife right there.

00:03:48,780 --> 00:03:50,She's a handsome woman. Yeah.

00:03:52,320 --> 00:03:53,You should see her in color.

00:03:54,960 --> 00:03:56,Oh, I'm sorry. Now, look.

00:03:56,400 --> 00:03:59,Look, I've g***t twenty. How much was
that? Twenty. Oh, good.

00:04:00,390 --> 00:04:02,That dinner looks great, by the way.

00:04:02,310 --> 00:04:04,I didn't even get any dinner.

00:04:06,550 --> 00:04:07,Hi, D***k. Oh,

00:04:10,950 --> 00:04:11,you want to talk in your study?

00:04:12,130 --> 00:04:15,I want to work in my study. Listen,
before you start, what would you say to

00:04:15,610 --> 00:04:17,and me building a miniature golf course?

00:04:17,450 --> 00:04:18,I would say I'm very busy and good
night.

00:04:19,190 --> 00:04:22,D***k, pull your head out of the sand and
listen to the world around you. People

00:04:22,490 --> 00:04:24,love miniature golf.

00:04:24,310 --> 00:04:26,I have a book that's due in four days. I
don't care.

00:04:28,330 --> 00:04:30,Miniature Golf is a goldmine. I mean,
just think how it would sound. The

00:04:30,850 --> 00:04:32,Stratford Inn, nestled in a grove of
maple.

00:04:33,690 --> 00:04:37,Stratford Inn, nestled in a grove of
maple. Just a stone's throw from

00:04:37,690 --> 00:04:42,College. Featuring colonial decor and holes of championship miniature golf.

00:04:42,430 --> 00:04:43,No, Kirk.

00:04:43,230 --> 00:04:46,Before you say no. I just said no. Let
me get some brochures. No. I'll bring

00:04:46,890 --> 00:04:47,them over tomorrow.

00:04:47,670 --> 00:04:50,No. I'll be by at 8 in the morning. No.
I'll see you at 8.

00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:01,Hi. No breakfast?

00:05:02,080 --> 00:05:03,No time. You can't write on an empty
stomach.

00:05:04,100 --> 00:05:07,Yes, I can. Honey, I'll have a big
lunch. I've g***t to get started. And I

00:05:07,560 --> 00:05:10,it. No calls, no interruptions. I don't
care if the inn is burning down. Just

00:05:10,520 --> 00:05:13,throw a wet blanket over me and let me
keep working, all right? Morning.

00:05:14,340 --> 00:05:18,Any word from my wife yet? Morning, Mr.
Halstead. No, I'm sorry. Oh.

00:05:19,740 --> 00:05:21,D***k told me what happened. I'm sorry,
too.

00:05:22,420 --> 00:05:24,You'll have to excuse me. I have a book
to write.

00:05:24,820 --> 00:05:25,You're a writer?

00:05:26,060 --> 00:05:28,Yeah. Boy, I always wanted to be a
writer.

00:05:30,670 --> 00:05:32,And a pilot. I really wanted to be a
pilot.

00:05:33,750 --> 00:05:35,All right, I really have to get to work.

00:05:37,070 --> 00:05:38,What's the book about?

00:05:40,590 --> 00:05:43,Camping. Oh, I always wanted to be a
camper.

00:05:46,230 --> 00:05:49,Well, I guess I'll be leaving. I hope
things work out with you and your wife.

00:05:49,870 --> 00:05:53,Oh, I'm sure they will. We have our
little tips like everybody every once in

00:05:53,430 --> 00:05:56,while. You wouldn't know where I can get
some flowers this early in the morning.

00:05:57,050 --> 00:05:59,Gee, I don't know. I doubt if the
florist is open yet.

00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:01,Hi. Where's D***k?

00:06:02,460 --> 00:06:05,I thought I'd stop by the house before
she left for work.

00:06:05,320 --> 00:06:06,Who? His wife.

00:06:06,760 --> 00:06:08,Sure would help if I had some flowers on
me when I do.

00:06:09,220 --> 00:06:10,Take these.

00:06:12,480 --> 00:06:15,Those would be fine. Oh, that's awfully
nice.

00:06:16,300 --> 00:06:18,You wouldn't have a card to go with
these.

00:06:18,800 --> 00:06:20,What do you need a card for? She'll know
they're flowers.

00:06:22,600 --> 00:06:26,Is D***k still sleeping? No, Kirk. Well,
thanks anyway. Gosh, this is a nice

00:06:26,580 --> 00:06:28,place. Maybe I'll come back sometime.

00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:29,With your wife.

00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:30,Right. Goodbye.

00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:32,And good luck.

00:06:32,040 --> 00:06:34,Thanks. Oh, and I'll return the vase.

00:06:34,480 --> 00:06:35,Keep it.

00:06:36,640 --> 00:06:38,Is he in his study? You can't go in.

00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:40,I'll tell him he tried to stop me.

00:06:40,940 --> 00:06:43,You're not going to believe how cheaply
we can get into miniature golf. Joanne.

00:06:44,080 --> 00:06:46,I tried to stop him. No, she didn't.

00:06:48,140 --> 00:06:51,Kirk, get out. It's okay. I can take
her.

00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:53,Kirk, get out.

00:06:54,700 --> 00:06:58,Guess how absurdly little it will cost
to build a course. No.

00:06:58,720 --> 00:06:59,Guess or I'm never leaving.

00:07:00,480 --> 00:07:01,$5 ,000.

00:07:01,620 --> 00:07:05,Get real, D***k. $15 ,000. But we'll make
that back the first day. Get out. Just

00:07:05,940 --> 00:07:07,take a look at some of these themes we
can choose from.

00:07:08,300 --> 00:07:09,There's galactic golf.

00:07:09,640 --> 00:07:10,There's daffy golf.

00:07:10,880 --> 00:07:12,There's gorilla golf.

00:07:12,300 --> 00:07:16,Kirk, it's a dumb plan. We have snow on
the ground six months out of the year.

00:07:16,320 --> 00:07:17,Polar golf.

00:07:17,840 --> 00:07:19,And the other two months, we have mud.

00:07:19,960 --> 00:07:22,I mean, I don't have...