The Bernie Mac Show Wrestling With A Sticky Situation Aac2 0 H 264-squalor S05E02 Subtitles

At 00:00:03,579, Character said: (theme music playing)

2
At 00:00:17,968, Character said: (school bell rings)

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At 00:00:22,297, Character said: Hey, Tracy.
Pick a card.

4
At 00:00:24,299, Character said: Uh, well, I'm, uh...
I'm late for class.

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At 00:00:28,729, Character said: But it's recess.

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At 00:00:30,448, Character said: What's up, Jordan?

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At 00:00:32,766, Character said: JORDAN:
Help...
Very few teams
have someone

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At 00:00:34,935, Character said: in the 105-pound
weight class.

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At 00:00:36,853, Character said: MAN: If we could field someone,
that's an easy
point to pick up.

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At 00:00:39,648, Character said: Dang, I miss junior high.

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At 00:00:42,317, Character said: (grunts)

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At 00:00:43,794, Character said: Calm down, son.
What's your name?

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At 00:00:48,040, Character said: Jordan Tompkins.

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At 00:00:49,491, Character said: What do you go,
about 102?

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At 00:00:51,034, Character said: I'm 103.

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At 00:00:53,954, Character said: (whimpers)

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At 00:00:56,548, Character said: Good reflexes.

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At 00:00:58,375, Character said: JORDAN:
Ladies and gentlemen,
let's hear it

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At 00:01:00,544, Character said: for wrestling's
new dark lord,

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At 00:01:02,295, Character said: the master
of the macabre,

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At 00:01:03,964, Character said: Jordan "The Psycho" Tompkins.

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At 00:01:07,634, Character said: Hey, Jordan, I mean, uh...
what's that getup?

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At 00:01:10,929, Character said: I made the wrestling team, and
Coach says I g***t what it takes.

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At 00:01:14,015, Character said: Oh, that's so cute.
Let me get my camera.
Hold on, baby.

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At 00:01:17,310, Character said: BERNIE:
Ain't nothing cute
about wrestling.

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At 00:01:19,229, Character said: It's about dominating and
humiliating your opponent.

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At 00:01:21,606, Character said: Hmm...
All right, now, Jordan.

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At 00:01:24,067, Character said: Let me see your game face.

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At 00:01:26,111, Character said: (growling)
Now that's
adorable.

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At 00:01:28,547, Character said: I'm going to
get my camera.
You're so cute.

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At 00:01:32,701, Character said: (soft growl)

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At 00:01:34,161, Character said: Hold on. I mean,
Jordan a wrestler?

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At 00:01:36,997, Character said: I mean, I could see
him wrestling

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At 00:01:38,298, Character said: with the lid
of a mayonnaise jar

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At 00:01:39,949, Character said: and ending up with a dry,
dry sandwich, you know?

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At 00:01:42,169, Character said: (chuckles)

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At 00:01:43,920, Character said: But what'd you think, Steve?

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At 00:01:45,380, Character said: Well, I don't know.
I mean...

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At 00:01:47,224, Character said: It don't look like the kid
could beat up a rag doll.

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At 00:01:49,801, Character said: He's skinny as a rail,

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At 00:01:51,436, Character said: but you know, when it
comes down to it,

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At 00:01:53,180, Character said: it's not about how
big the man is.
Right.

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At 00:01:55,182, Character said: It's how big this is.

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At 00:01:56,725, Character said: Okay. Yeah, sure, sure.

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At 00:01:59,144, Character said: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

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At 00:02:00,729, Character said: But did you see me
teach him the game face?

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At 00:02:03,106, Character said: (growling)

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At 00:02:04,733, Character said: Man, don't give people
a reason to hate him.
Yeah...

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At 00:02:07,652, Character said: Yeah, you're right.

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At 00:02:10,405, Character said: (indistinct shouting)

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At 00:02:17,120, Character said: MAN: I need a
wrestler, Coach.

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At 00:02:18,672, Character said: What's the matter, Bill?
Don't have anyone?

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At 00:02:21,091, Character said: (sighs)

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At 00:02:29,174, Character said: Winner, by default.

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At 00:02:30,884, Character said: Match point, Damien.

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At 00:02:33,595, Character said: But I didn't
do anything.
Sure you did.

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At 00:02:35,722, Character said: In fact, you're
our secret weapon.

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At 00:02:37,557, Character said: -Wow, secret weapon?
-Shh-shh-shh-shh.

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At 00:02:40,101, Character said: Let's keep it
a secret,
shall we?

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At 00:02:41,937, Character said: Oh...

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At 00:02:47,901, Character said: Sorry. Sorry.

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At 00:02:50,887, Character said: Yup, the coach gives you a pin
every time you win a match.

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At 00:02:53,406, Character said: Yeah, that's nice.

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At 00:02:55,593, Character said: So tell me, Jordan,
how'd you really
do it, man?

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At 00:02:57,869, Character said: I mean, how you
sweep his legs
from under him, man,

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At 00:03:00,247, Character said: how you ground his
face into the mat.
Come on, show me, man.

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At 00:03:02,832, Character said: I mean, tell me,
tell me how
you did it.

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At 00:03:04,584, Character said: Well, honestly,
it happened so fast,

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At 00:03:07,587, Character said: I don't even know
what happened.

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At 00:03:09,297, Character said: Well, that's okay,

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At 00:03:11,108, Character said: but the important thing
is, you handled
your business.

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At 00:03:14,261, Character said: Uh, yeah. I'm going to go
get something to eat.

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At 00:03:16,263, Character said: Modesty is good for you, son.

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At 00:03:18,848, Character said: It's the mark of a champion.

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At 00:03:22,736, Character said: Winner by default.
Match point, Damien.

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At 00:03:25,897, Character said: Winner, by default.
Match point, Damien.

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At 00:03:32,287, Character said: Winner by default.
Match point, Damien.

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At 00:03:40,095, Character said: (wrestlers muttering)

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At 00:04:04,894, Character said: WANDA:
Can I help you?

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At 00:04:07,063, Character said: Uh...

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At 00:04:08,606, Character said: I, um...

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At 00:04:11,234, Character said: The, the plastic bag, uh...

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At 00:04:13,320, Character said: See, I was doing, um,
a science project on...

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At 00:04:16,823, Character said: Save it. Out.

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At 00:04:18,033, Character said: Oh, wow, look it here,

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At 00:04:20,010, Character said: Mr. 5 and 0.

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At 00:04:22,037, Character said: So tell me, son.
When ** I going
to get a chance

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At 00:04:24,205, Character said: to see you destroy
your next opponent, huh?

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At 00:04:26,333, Character said: Uh, I-I don't know.
I mean, all the wrestling
matches are... away.

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At 00:04:30,879, Character said: Yeah. It's a
weird schedule...
VANESSA:
I don't know what

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At 00:04:32,639, Character said: the big deal is,
you haven't
worn that in months.

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At 00:04:34,549, Character said: WANDA:
That is not the point.

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At 00:04:36,176, Character said: Bernie, could you
please explain to her

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At 00:04:37,644, Character said: that my clothes
are my clothes,

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At 00:04:39,679, Character said: even though I don't wear them as
often as she would like me to?

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At 00:04:42,682, Character said: VANESSA:
Maybe if I had
my own clothes,

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At 00:04:44,309, Character said: I wouldn't have
to borrow yours.

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At 00:04:45,852, Character said: Bernie?

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At 00:04:48,438, Character said: You mean, get
in the middle

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At 00:04:49,990, Character said: of two women wrestling
over a blouse? Shoot.

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At 00:04:52,626, Character said: I'd rather climb in the
ring with you, Steve.

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At 00:04:55,320, Character said: Really?
Yeah.

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At 00:04:56,946, Character said: Well, let's go.

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At 00:04:58,832, Character said: Listen, listen to your
Aunt Wanda, okay?

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At 00:05:01,302, Character said: That's all you're
gonna say?

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At 00:05:04,204, Character said: Oh, okay.
Here's the deal.

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At 00:05:06,122, Character said: Since you like wearing
everyone's clothes so much,

108
At 00:05:08,675, Character said: you can wash everyone's
clothes for a month.

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At 00:05:11,836, Character said: VANESSA: For a month?
WANDA: 30 days.

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At 00:05:13,939, Character said: But that's not fair.

111
At 00:05:15,690, Character said: You are so mean now,
and this house is
like a prison.

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At 00:05:19,186, Character said: Shazam.

113
At 00:05:26,142, Character said: Looking good. Next.

114
At 00:05:31,957, Character said: -113.
-What? Let me see that.

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At 00:05:36,128, Character said: You are supposed
to be 105!

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At 00:05:38,405, Character said: What's the big deal?

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At 00:05:42,534, Character said: Hey, I wasn't
finished with that.

118
At 00:05:44,786, Character said: Look, regionals
are this Friday.

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At 00:05:47,455, Character said: You are no good
to me at 113.

120
At 00:05:50,175, Character said: So you will either
make weight,

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At 00:05:51,643, Character said: or you might actually
have to wrestle somebody

122
At 00:05:53,479, Character said: and get that pretty little
singlet of yours all dirty.

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At 00:05:56,223, Character said: (whimpering)

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At 00:05:59,551, Character said: I bet he just
dirtied it now.
Shut it!

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At 00:06:02,804, Character said: Next!

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At 00:06:10,437, Character said: Thanks for the pancakes,
Uncle Bernie.

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At 00:06:12,272, Character said: You're welcome,
sweetheart.

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At 00:06:13,731, Character said: Come on. Well?

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At 00:06:15,501, Character said: (sighs)
Does anybody have any clothes
that they want me to wash?

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At 00:06:21,948, Character said: Here.
You can take this.

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At 00:06:25,118, Character said: Now, off to your
brother's room.

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At 00:06:27,454, Character said: (scoffs)
I'm not going in there,
and you can't make me.

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At 00:06:30,790, Character said: I said march.
(footsteps receding)

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At 00:06:34,836, Character said: SINGER: ♪ Now that I
have the chance ♪
(knock at door)

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At 00:06:36,963, Character said: ♪ Always be a fool
if I didn't take it ♪

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At 00:06:38,673, Character said: ♪ I know you love me... ♪

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At 00:06:39,850, Character said: You may enter.

138
At 00:06:41,618, Character said: ♪ Wouldn't take
your heart if I knew
I had to break it... ♪

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At 00:06:44,604, Character said: Ugh! Do...