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00:00:37,996 --> 00:00:40,{\an8} Let's talk about plans.

00:00:40,290 --> 00:00:42,{\an8} Everything you've ever loved,

00:00:42,292 --> 00:00:45,{\an8} every cool thing that's ever existed,

00:00:45,587 --> 00:00:46,{\an8} it started with a plan.

00:00:47,839 --> 00:00:51,{\an8} What you're looking at right now,
that's my plan.

00:00:51,176 --> 00:00:54,{\an8} My entire life mapped out
in exacting detail,

00:00:54,554 --> 00:00:56,{\an8} year by year, goal by goal.

00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:58,{\an8} This is what I do.

00:00:58,892 --> 00:00:59,{\an8} I plan.

00:01:00,101 --> 00:01:03,{\an8} And my plans always work.

00:01:03,855 --> 00:01:05,{\an8}Until they don't.

00:01:17,619 --> 00:01:18,Ted! Ted, Ted!

00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:20,Get up, we're out of time. Hurry!

00:01:21,164 --> 00:01:23,Where are my pants?

00:01:23,208 --> 00:01:25,Ted, there's no time,
you have to get up now!

00:01:25,710 --> 00:01:27,- My pants.
- Freeman!

00:01:27,879 --> 00:01:28,Come on, Ted! Move!

00:01:29,089 --> 00:01:30,My pants!

00:01:30,673 --> 00:01:32,I know what you're thinking.

00:01:32,300 --> 00:01:35,"How did I, Ted Freeman,
Dean's list member,

00:01:35,637 --> 00:01:36,Honor Roll recipient,

00:01:37,138 --> 00:01:40,and straight A student end up like this?"

00:01:46,773 --> 00:01:51,Well, I guess it all started
with the SPLAT.

00:01:51,402 --> 00:01:55,The Specialized Placement
Achievement Test,

00:01:55,323 --> 00:01:58,the mother of all standardized testing,

00:01:58,618 --> 00:02:00,the decider of your future.

00:02:00,745 --> 00:02:01,Typical.

00:02:01,955 --> 00:02:04,Everyone here actually tries.

00:02:04,541 --> 00:02:06,And you two just breeze on through.

00:02:07,085 --> 00:02:08,Oh, hi, Penny.

00:02:08,294 --> 00:02:09,Nice to see you too.

00:02:09,796 --> 00:02:12,Let your intellect be your sword,
logic your armor.

00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:15,It's not like you're gonna pass
the SPLAT anyway,

00:02:15,301 --> 00:02:16,but Ted ought to know better.

00:02:16,886 --> 00:02:17,Ted doesn't need to worry

00:02:18,138 --> 00:02:21,because Ted has the highest
scores in the entire school.

00:02:21,766 --> 00:02:22,And what rank are you again?

00:02:23,101 --> 00:02:24,Hmm, let me think.

00:02:25,103 --> 00:02:28,Oh, I remember number two.
As always.

00:02:29,107 --> 00:02:30,Guys, we're gonna miss something.

00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:34,Springdale Magnet,
put your hands together

00:02:34,404 --> 00:02:37,for Sammie Steambear.

00:02:38,658 --> 00:02:41,Feeling trapped? Feeling stressed?

00:02:41,870 --> 00:02:43,Feeling helpless?

00:02:44,080 --> 00:02:47,Why, it's nothing a little magic
can't fix!

00:02:48,126 --> 00:02:51,With a little preparation and
a simple wave of the hand,

00:02:51,296 --> 00:02:55,you too can watch in wonderment
as your stress disappears!

00:02:56,134 --> 00:02:57,Garbage in, garbage out.

00:03:10,106 --> 00:03:11,Chad, everyone!

00:03:12,066 --> 00:03:13,The Amazing Chad!

00:03:13,568 --> 00:03:16,Oh, the Amazing Chad!

00:03:18,531 --> 00:03:22,All right, and how about those
sound and lighting effects?

00:03:22,493 --> 00:03:23,All computer controlled

00:03:24,037 --> 00:03:26,by my brilliant daughter, Gertrude Neely!

00:03:26,497 --> 00:03:28,If anyone's interested
and looking for a bestie,

00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:30,she's available.

00:03:30,376 --> 00:03:31,She's super.

00:03:31,961 --> 00:03:33,Gertz!

00:03:33,630 --> 00:03:37,Okay, so as you guys know,
I ** Principal Neely.

00:03:37,425 --> 00:03:38,Neely!

00:03:39,135 --> 00:03:40,Thank you. Thank you.

00:03:40,720 --> 00:03:45,And welcome to Springdale
Magnet School Prep Rally!

00:03:47,602 --> 00:03:48,As you know, Springdale Magnet School

00:03:49,103 --> 00:03:52,for the Arts and Sciences,
it's a really special place

00:03:52,857 --> 00:03:56,where we value
unconventional gifts here.

00:03:56,945 --> 00:03:59,But to do that, there's a trade off,

00:03:59,322 --> 00:04:01,and that's the SPLAT test.

00:04:01,616 --> 00:04:04,It's the most important test
of your middle school careers,

00:04:04,494 --> 00:04:07,and tomorrow you're going
to sit there and take it.

00:04:09,666 --> 00:04:13,I trust you've used these
past few weeks to study up,

00:04:13,586 --> 00:04:16,because you know that
this magnet program

00:04:16,172 --> 00:04:19,depends on the outcome of these tests.

00:04:19,550 --> 00:04:22,If the magnet test fails, then many of you

00:04:22,303 --> 00:04:25,will have to go back
to your zoned schools.

00:04:25,640 --> 00:04:28,Can you imagine going
to different schools?

00:04:28,351 --> 00:04:30,It would s***k, we'd never
even get to hang out.

00:04:30,561 --> 00:04:32,I mean, take me, for example.

00:04:32,480 --> 00:04:35,I didn't get to go to a
magnet school, and look at me.

00:04:35,733 --> 00:04:38,Knowing my dad, he'd probably just
ship me off to the army or something.

00:04:38,820 --> 00:04:39,No, he wouldn't.

00:04:41,864 --> 00:04:42,Would he?

00:04:44,242 --> 00:04:46,You really never make
those bonds with people.

00:04:46,619 --> 00:04:47,And then you try and you get married,

00:04:48,162 --> 00:04:49,and then that doesn't work out.

00:04:49,622 --> 00:04:51,He cheats, so you know...

00:04:51,916 --> 00:04:54,Anyway, nevermind, so now to teach you

00:04:54,585 --> 00:04:58,some totally sick stress
relieving techniques

00:04:58,798 --> 00:05:01,is Mr. Gary Garrie,
our guidance counselor.

00:05:05,096 --> 00:05:06,Hey, everybody. Hey, everybody.

00:05:07,098 --> 00:05:08,That was a lot, huh?

00:05:08,891 --> 00:05:10,Well, that goes to show us

00:05:10,393 --> 00:05:13,how much Principal Neely
loves this magnet program.

00:05:14,063 --> 00:05:15,Okay?

00:05:15,398 --> 00:05:18,She beat out a lot of qualified
candidates to get this job.

00:05:20,111 --> 00:05:24,And it's our job to make sure
that we don't let her down!

00:05:25,283 --> 00:05:27,Now, let's talk about stress.

00:05:27,744 --> 00:05:28,- Stress ain't groovy.
- No.

00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:31,- It's not groovy at all.
- No.

00:05:31,247 --> 00:05:32,- It's a bummer.
- Yeah.

00:05:32,999 --> 00:05:35,Okay? A straight up bummer.

00:05:35,376 --> 00:05:38,But we have to find healthy
ways to deal with stress.

00:05:39,130 --> 00:05:40,You know what it is?

00:05:40,381 --> 00:05:41,- I'm listening.
- Jazz flute.

00:05:42,133 --> 00:05:45,- No! No!
- Oh, come on! Every time.

00:05:46,054 --> 00:05:47,No, no, no. Gary, we talked about this.

00:05:48,097 --> 00:05:49,No jazz flute?

00:05:49,349 --> 00:05:52,- I was working on it.
- Nobody likes jazz flute but you.

00:05:55,396 --> 00:05:58,Okay, thank you, Mr. Gary Garrie.

00:05:58,399 --> 00:06:01,Moving on now, why
don't we get some words

00:06:01,235 --> 00:06:03,from our campus security,
Mr. Terry Grimes.

00:06:04,113 --> 00:06:05,A positive word, Terry.

00:06:09,035 --> 00:06:10,Okay, listen up, punks.

00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:14,I know some of you are gonna use this
as an excuse to act out,

00:06:14,207 --> 00:06:16,but I'm here to lay down the law.

00:06:17,126 --> 00:06:21,Starting now, there will be zero tolerance
for any malfeasance.

00:06:21,631 --> 00:06:23,- Dude, check it. Check it!
- That includes antics,

00:06:24,133 --> 00:06:25,hijinks, shenanigans.

00:06:25,885 --> 00:06:26,Here where it comes.

00:06:28,179 --> 00:06:29,And especially pranks.

00:06:35,103 --> 00:06:36,Freeman!

00:06:38,106 --> 00:06:39,The splatter horn.

00:06:39,524 --> 00:06:40,Your best plan yet.

00:06:46,114 --> 00:06:47,Freeman!

00:06:56,666 --> 00:06:59,Malfeasance,
malfeasance, malfeasance.

00:07:09,011 --> 00:07:09,So?

00:07:10,054 --> 00:07:12,Well, the person in the video didn't lie.

00:07:12,890 --> 00:07:14,The end is shocking.

00:07:14,392 --> 00:07:16,Expel them, especially Freeman.

00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:18,I know he posted this,

00:07:18,855 --> 00:07:21,and I know he pulled that
little stunt on the stage today.

00:07:21,858 --> 00:07:24,Excuse me, but whatever happened

00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:27,to innocent until proven guilty?

00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:32,Something you wanna say, Cliff?

00:07:33,119 --> 00:07:34,Why, yes, Hannah, I do
have something to say.

00:07:35,496 --> 00:07:36,This is a classic example

00:07:37,123 --> 00:07:39,of why I don't want my boy
hanging out with your boy.

00:07:39,625 --> 00:07:43,Your kid masterminds these crazy
schemes and drags Josh down with him.

00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:45,Our boys are best friends.

00:07:45,423 --> 00:07:48,How could you even think
of tearing them apart?

00:07:48,634 --> 00:07:50,Oh, don't be so dramatic.

00:07:50,344 --> 00:07:52,Your boy needs discipline.

00:07:52,221 --> 00:07:57,Oh, okay. Sir, yes sir, Lieutenant Dad!

00:07:57,226 --> 00:07:59,Don't call me that. You...

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