Alfred.Hitchcock.Presents.S04E03.The.Jokester.480p.DVD.DD.2.0.H.265.-EDGE2020_track3_[eng]-eng Subtitles

At 00:00:26,093, Character said: Good evening.

2
At 00:00:28,362, Character said: It grieves me to announce that
it will be impossible for my
cousin, Alvin Hitchcock,

3
At 00:00:34,501, Character said: to entertain you
with his singing.

4
At 00:00:37,838, Character said: He fell victim to a crowd
of teenage souvenir hunters.

5
At 00:00:42,509, Character said: After first helping themselves
to bits of his clothing,

6
At 00:00:46,280, Character said: they began snipping off
locks of his hair.

7
At 00:00:49,850, Character said: He held still for that.

8
At 00:00:51,752, Character said: After all, he certainly
needed a haircut.

9
At 00:00:54,755, Character said: But when they had
exhausted his hair,

10
At 00:00:57,357, Character said: they refused
to stop shipping.

11
At 00:01:00,027, Character said: He was very popular.

12
At 00:01:02,896, Character said: This was all we found.

13
At 00:01:04,965, Character said: Tonight's program
was to have included
many of his greatest hits.

14
At 00:01:09,836, Character said: I Dig You, Darling,
‘Cause You're Sick,
Sick, Sick.

15
At 00:01:14,241, Character said: The FBI Is Breaking Up
That Old Gang Of Mine.

16
At 00:01:19,179, Character said: Take Off Your
Leather Jacket, Mother.
You Shall Not Ride Tonight.

17
At 00:01:24,518, Character said: And Tchaikovsky's
Rock And Roll Concerto.

18
At 00:01:28,388, Character said: Substituting for his concert
is a play, "The Jokester."

19
At 00:01:33,026, Character said: However,
as a tribute to Alvin,

20
At 00:01:36,597, Character said: let us first observe
one minute of noise.

21
At 00:02:37,424, Character said: (HEAVY THUD)

22
At 00:02:41,194, Character said: DAVE: Oh, come on,
Andrews, let it alone.

23
At 00:02:44,131, Character said: Bet I woke every
stiff up down there.

24
At 00:02:46,400, Character said: You're high, Andrews,
what are your bets?

25
At 00:02:47,968, Character said: Let's see, that'll be
what, a couple?

26
At 00:02:49,936, Character said: I'm out.

27
At 00:02:51,538, Character said: I'll see you,
Andrews.

28
At 00:02:52,739, Character said: Well, that puts
me out.

29
At 00:02:54,875, Character said: Joker gave me
a straight.

30
At 00:02:56,410, Character said: You bum.

31
At 00:02:57,911, Character said: You're pretty lucky.
Let's see how lucky you are
with your fists. Come on.

32
At 00:03:00,747, Character said: Watch it, Andrews,
you might get hit
in the wrong place.

33
At 00:03:02,683, Character said: Oh, what do you mean?
I'm not kidding,
I've g***t a bum neck.

34
At 00:03:04,918, Character said: Come on,
what are you talking about?
MORGAN: You're the picture
of health.

35
At 00:03:07,454, Character said: No, I've g***t a very
sensitive vertebrae
right here.

36
At 00:03:09,122, Character said: I hurt it playing
football in high school.

37
At 00:03:11,224, Character said: ANDREWS: Oh, come on,
that was years ago.

38
At 00:03:13,026, Character said: MORGAN: Yeah.
You're breaking my heart.

39
At 00:03:15,362, Character said: I spent two weeks in a bed
paralyzed because of it.

40
At 00:03:19,166, Character said: Well, it sure doesn't
stop you from winning
at poker.

41
At 00:03:21,334, Character said: Now, that's the second time
you've drawn the joker.

42
At 00:03:23,837, Character said: Well, that's the
perfect card for me.

43
At 00:03:25,439, Character said: We're back to back,
same breed, joker and me.

44
At 00:03:28,475, Character said: Bradley,
the practical joker
of newspaper row.

45
At 00:03:31,144, Character said: At other people's
expense.

46
At 00:03:32,279, Character said: Oh, no, you're unfair
to me. You all are.

47
At 00:03:34,081, Character said: You can't deny
that you live
only for a laugh.

48
At 00:03:36,516, Character said: Well, we're laughing.

49
At 00:03:37,984, Character said: Well, why not?

50
At 00:03:39,319, Character said: Life is one big joke
from the day you're born.

51
At 00:03:42,289, Character said: Fate gives you
the unexpected hotfoot,

52
At 00:03:44,558, Character said: puts a sneezing powder
in your bouquet of roses

53
At 00:03:47,094, Character said: and I just go
along with it.

54
At 00:03:49,129, Character said: MORGAN: You're high, Dave.
Check.

55
At 00:03:51,431, Character said: Check.
My cards.

56
At 00:03:53,066, Character said: Oh, hiya, Pop.
How you feeling?

57
At 00:03:54,468, Character said: Fine.
What's happening
downstairs, Pop?

58
At 00:03:56,002, Character said: I wondered about
my story, Dave.

59
At 00:03:58,505, Character said: Oh, it's gonna be
in the paper tomorrow.
Two column spread, Pop.

60
At 00:04:01,641, Character said: That's real
nice, son.

61
At 00:04:03,510, Character said: I ain't never
had any of you
newspaper people

62
At 00:04:05,746, Character said: to hardly ask me
a question,

63
At 00:04:07,347, Character said: much less
write about my...
You g***t a pair, Dave.

64
At 00:04:09,516, Character said: Yeah,
what'll you do?
Oh, well, let's see,

65
At 00:04:11,818, Character said: that's worth
two bucks.
Let's make it five.

66
At 00:04:13,987, Character said: I'm out.

67
At 00:04:16,189, Character said: Say, Pop,
maybe Dave's story will
help you keep your job.

68
At 00:04:19,126, Character said: Huh? I didn't catch that.

69
At 00:04:20,694, Character said: ALL: Maybe Dave's story
will help you keep your job!

70
At 00:04:23,697, Character said: Oh, sure hope so.

71
At 00:04:25,832, Character said: Some people say
that they should have
retired me five years ago.

72
At 00:04:29,035, Character said: But I need this job.
My wife, she's so sick.

73
At 00:04:32,606, Character said: Four, five,
I've lost count, operations,

74
At 00:04:36,042, Character said: and my retirement pay
is so little, I...

75
At 00:04:39,079, Character said: Well,
thanks again, Dave.
Okay, Pop.

76
At 00:04:42,082, Character said: Table's bet.
Well, let's see.

77
At 00:04:44,451, Character said: Well, you must be thick
to waste your columns
on Pop Henderson.

78
At 00:04:47,854, Character said: What do you mean?
It made an
interesting story.

79
At 00:04:50,223, Character said: Hearts and flowers?
Pop Henderson partially blind,
partially deaf, totally dumb?

80
At 00:04:56,963, Character said: Or Pop Henderson who has
cataloged the dead for
so long

81
At 00:04:59,933, Character said: he feels closer to them
than he does the living?

82
At 00:05:02,035, Character said: Is that the way
you wrote it?

83
At 00:05:03,370, Character said: Okay, okay,
I've had enough.

84
At 00:05:04,838, Character said: Oh, come on, Dave.
No, so long,
fellas.

85
At 00:05:06,640, Character said: All right.
So long, Dave.
DAVE: So long.

86
At 00:05:08,809, Character said: Well, that
kind of broke up
the poker game.

87
At 00:05:10,644, Character said: Yeah, I guess
that's it.

88
At 00:05:18,718, Character said: Gentlemen, let's pay a visit
downstairs to the morgue.

89
At 00:05:21,888, Character said: Huh?
Pop Henderson,

90
At 00:05:23,356, Character said: a man that gives
me inspiration.

91
At 00:05:26,393, Character said: Yeah, okay.

92
At 00:05:27,761, Character said: Okay, it's cooler
down there, anyway.

93
At 00:05:31,631, Character said: Come on.

94
At 00:05:36,036, Character said: (SNORING)

95
At 00:05:56,256, Character said: (POP COUGHING)

96
At 00:06:00,260, Character said: Oh, hi, fellas.

97
At 00:06:02,462, Character said: Hi, Pop.

98
At 00:06:03,897, Character said: Taking a snooze,
Pop?

99
At 00:06:05,866, Character said: Yeah, I get kind of drowsy
about this time of night.

100
At 00:06:09,169, Character said: We've come to ask
you a favor.
POP: Oh?

101
At 00:06:11,872, Character said: We want to look
at number six.

102
At 00:06:13,640, Character said: Oh, that's the strangulation
case that come in today,
ain't it?

103
At 00:06:17,744, Character said: Yeah, that's the one.
We just g***t a tip.

104
At 00:06:19,946, Character said: Might be a real
scoop, Pop.
Yeah, headline stuff.

105
At 00:06:21,948, Character said: It's that missing
New York banker.

106
At 00:06:23,950, Character said: You don't say. Him?

107
At 00:06:25,518, Character said: ANDREWS: Mmm-hmm.
What about it, Pop,
can we see him?

108
At 00:06:27,554, Character said: Sure, come on.

109
At 00:06:33,526, Character said: Let's see,
number seven.

110
At 00:06:38,031, Character said: How about
number six?

111
At 00:06:39,299, Character said: Oh, of course,
number six.

112
At 00:06:42,435, Character said: Yeah, here it is.

113
At 00:06:45,205, Character said: Good old number six.

114
At 00:06:47,641, Character said: Come on out.

115
At 00:06:52,545, Character said: There you are.

116
At 00:06:53,947, Character said: Oh, you've g***t
your refrigeration
working overtime, Pop.

117
At 00:06:56,750, Character said: No, it's always that cold,
below freezing.

118
At 00:06:59,786, Character said: It looks like the banker.
How about it, gentlemen?

119
At 00:07:02,589, Character said: Yes, yes, it certainly
resembles him.

120
At 00:07:04,691, Character said: Yeah, that chin.
One in a million.

121
At 00:07:06,693, Character said: Oh, yeah, right.
It fits the description,
all right.

122
At 00:07:10,096, Character said: Morgan, why don't you
go along with Pop

123
At 00:07:12,599, Character said: and get the folder
on this gentleman?

124
At 00:07:14,401, Character said: Sure.
Pop?

125
At 00:07:15,869, Character said: All right, Mr. Bradley.

126
At 00:07:25,278, Character said: Now, let's see,
number seven.

127
At 00:07:28,048, Character said: No, no, number six, Pop.

128
At 00:07:29,549, Character said: Oh, of course, I know.

129
At 00:07:32,352, Character said: There it is.
There you are.

130
At 00:07:34,821, Character said: Now, wait a minute.
Let's make sure
we're...