Newhart s02e05 The Girl from Manhattan Movie Subtitles

1 00:01:07,419 --> 00:01:11,540 Why are you being so stubborn? I'm not being stubborn. I'm just saying no. 2 00:01:12,460 --> 00:01:15,520 Why won't anybody in this inn ever do a favor for me? 3 00:01:15,740 --> 00:01:18,980 What are you guys talking? I want to borrow George's truck and he won't let 4 00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:21,120 I won't let you because you're a terrible driver. 5 00:01:21,560 --> 00:01:23,780 You don't know that. You've never even ridden with me. 6 00:01:24,560 --> 00:01:26,680 Why do you need George's truck? I wrecked my car. 7 00:01:28,040 --> 00:01:30,440 You're not getting my truck and that's fine. 8 00:01:30,640 --> 00:01:32,360 Fine. Then our friendship is over. 9 00:01:32,940 --> 00:01:33,940 D***k, give me your car. 10 00:01:34,330 --> 00:01:37,550 I can't. Joanna's at a community theater meeting. I promised I'd pick her up. 11 00:01:37,610 --> 00:01:39,430 Why do you need a car tonight anyway? 12 00:01:39,750 --> 00:01:42,390 Because I have a date and I'd rather not pick her up on a bicycle. 13 00:01:43,330 --> 00:01:47,050 Well, if nobody needs me to do anything, I'm going to drive into town and try 14 00:01:47,050 --> 00:01:48,050 out my new sweater. 15 00:01:50,130 --> 00:01:52,110 How do you try out a new sweater? 16 00:01:52,930 --> 00:01:56,350 Well, you walk down the street and see if anybody asks you out. 17 00:01:57,290 --> 00:01:58,390 Can I give you a lift? 18 00:01:59,170 --> 00:02:00,330 Sure, thanks. 19 00:02:03,370 --> 00:02:04,650 Mind if we use your car? 20 00:02:07,790 --> 00:02:08,790 Oh, I better get going. 21 00:02:08,990 --> 00:02:13,010 So Joanna's going to be in a play, huh? I guess. You know, I was in a play once. 22 00:02:13,330 --> 00:02:15,550 Oh, really? Yeah, it was a Christmas pageant. 23 00:02:15,790 --> 00:02:16,890 I played a shepherd. 24 00:02:18,650 --> 00:02:19,670 Sounds like a good part. 25 00:02:20,190 --> 00:02:21,190 Shepherd Bill. 26 00:02:25,930 --> 00:02:30,910 Okay, good idea. 27 00:02:31,750 --> 00:02:35,510 Okay, now, the next order of business is refreshments for the intermission. 28 00:02:36,090 --> 00:02:40,530 Chester, can we count on Dora making her hot cider again this year? Oh, yes, 29 00:02:40,590 --> 00:02:43,070 she's already laying in a supply of cinnamon sticks. 30 00:02:43,410 --> 00:02:44,770 What about your brownies, Shirley? 31 00:02:45,010 --> 00:02:47,210 They'll be here. If I don't eat them all first. 32 00:02:49,430 --> 00:02:50,910 I'll take care of the programs. 33 00:02:51,510 --> 00:02:52,930 Good, then we're all set there. 34 00:02:53,590 --> 00:02:54,930 What about tickets? 35 00:02:55,710 --> 00:02:57,610 Do you like to handle that this year, Joanna? 36 00:02:57,850 --> 00:03:01,210 No. Well, I mean, I will, but that's not why I was raising my hand. 37 00:03:01,650 --> 00:03:02,650 I had a question. 38 00:03:02,770 --> 00:03:03,770 Oh, what's that? 39 00:03:03,990 --> 00:03:07,190 Well, we've been sitting here for over an hour talking about publicity and 40 00:03:07,190 --> 00:03:10,830 refreshments and all that, but I haven't heard anyone mention what play we're 41 00:03:10,830 --> 00:03:11,369 going to do. 42 00:03:11,370 --> 00:03:13,750 Oh, we're going to do the same play we always do. 43 00:03:14,070 --> 00:03:15,530 Oh, what play is that? 44 00:03:16,090 --> 00:03:17,090 My Fair Lady. 45 00:03:18,410 --> 00:03:21,710 You do My Fair Lady every year? Since 1956. 46 00:03:23,970 --> 00:03:25,210 I'm Henry Higgins. 47 00:03:25,650 --> 00:03:26,850 I'm Colonel Pickering. 48 00:03:27,200 --> 00:03:30,300 And we were hoping that this year you'd be Eliza. Me? 49 00:03:31,200 --> 00:03:32,200 Eliza Doolittle? 50 00:03:32,620 --> 00:03:33,700 But that's the lead. 51 00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:38,420 Clara Mosby usually does Eliza, but she can't get around much anymore. 52 00:03:40,940 --> 00:03:42,880 Don't get me wrong, I'm flattered. 53 00:03:43,420 --> 00:03:45,320 The trouble is, I don't really sing. 54 00:03:45,740 --> 00:03:47,520 Don't worry about that. We don't do the songs. 55 00:03:49,980 --> 00:03:52,360 You do My Fair Lady without the music? 56 00:03:52,700 --> 00:03:54,580 Well, wait till you see it. It really zips along. 57 00:03:56,300 --> 00:03:59,860 What we do is Pygmalion. It's just that they prefer to call it My Fair Lady 58 00:03:59,860 --> 00:04:00,860 Without the Songs. 59 00:04:01,480 --> 00:04:02,480 Uh -huh. 60 00:04:02,760 --> 00:04:08,540 Uh, look, I... I don't mean to toy with tradition, but have you ever considered 61 00:04:08,540 --> 00:04:09,540 doing another play? 62 00:04:09,760 --> 00:04:10,800 Another play? 63 00:04:11,200 --> 00:04:12,880 Do you think anybody'd come? 64 00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:15,280 I'm sure they would. 65 00:04:15,560 --> 00:04:19,940 It's just that everybody knows My Fair Lady Without the Songs. They're used to 66 00:04:19,940 --> 00:04:23,680 it. Towards the end of the play, the whole audience usually says the lines 67 00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:24,680 along with it. 68 00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:27,880 I can't think of another play they'd enjoy as much. 69 00:04:28,240 --> 00:04:30,940 Say, what if D***k wrote us a play? 70 00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:34,140 What? Well, now, wait a minute. That could be a thought. 71 00:04:34,620 --> 00:04:35,620 Sure. 72 00:04:35,840 --> 00:04:40,020 Everybody in town knows D***k. Now, wait a minute. Can you imagine the excitement 73 00:04:40,020 --> 00:04:43,200 if we were doing a play by our own D***k Loudon? Hey, hey, hey, hey. 74 00:04:43,500 --> 00:04:46,960 D***k doesn't write plays. He writes books. 75 00:04:47,290 --> 00:04:50,790 Oh, a play would be a lot easier to write than a book. It's lots less words. 76 00:04:51,790 --> 00:04:52,790 That's true. 77 00:04:52,850 --> 00:04:55,590 Well, I could ask him, but I really wouldn't count on anything. 78 00:04:55,930 --> 00:04:56,930 That's the spirit. 79 00:04:57,830 --> 00:05:01,230 Myrna, you better get busy changing the programs. It's going to be a play by 80 00:05:01,230 --> 00:05:05,570 D***k Loudon this year. I didn't say that. I said I'd try. 81 00:05:06,130 --> 00:05:08,170 Well, how's he going to turn you down, Joanna? 82 00:05:08,810 --> 00:05:10,330 Well, I don't know. 83 00:05:25,710 --> 00:05:26,589 Ask a d***k. 84 00:05:26,590 --> 00:05:27,590 What's that? 85 00:05:27,730 --> 00:05:31,870 D***k, could I talk to you in private for a second? 86 00:05:34,730 --> 00:05:38,210 Joanna, if this has anything to do with community theater, I don't want to get 87 00:05:38,210 --> 00:05:39,810 involved. They want you to write a play. 88 00:05:40,250 --> 00:05:41,250 That's involved. 89 00:05:42,290 --> 00:05:45,590 I wouldn't be asking if it wasn't for the fact that I happen to know you 90 00:05:45,590 --> 00:05:46,469 have a play. 91 00:05:46,470 --> 00:05:48,150 Are you talking about the girl from Manhattan? 92 00:05:48,410 --> 00:05:52,450 Yes. I wrote that 16 years ago. It's corny. I think it's wonderful. 93 00:05:53,230 --> 00:05:55,430 Well, of course, you think it's wonderful. I wrote it for you. The main 94 00:05:55,430 --> 00:05:56,430 character's name is Joanna. 95 00:05:56,630 --> 00:05:58,150 That has nothing to do with it. 96 00:05:58,510 --> 00:06:00,090 Besides, it's cute and funny. 97 00:06:00,510 --> 00:06:03,890 And like you said, you did write it for me, so I don't see why I shouldn't be 98 00:06:03,890 --> 00:06:04,890 able to give it to them. 99 00:06:05,630 --> 00:06:06,630 Look at their faces. 100 00:06:10,590 --> 00:06:13,630 It would mean so much to them. 101 00:06:16,010 --> 00:06:17,470 They do love me. 102 00:06:19,770 --> 00:06:20,770 Please, honey. 103 00:06:20,930 --> 00:06:22,770 All right, I don't like it, but... 104 00:06:23,130 --> 00:06:24,930 You can have it. On one condition. What's that? 105 00:06:25,150 --> 00:06:28,150 That I don't have to rewrite it, I don't have to direct it, and I don't even 106 00:06:28,150 --> 00:06:29,330 have to come to see it. 107 00:06:37,090 --> 00:06:38,790 Excuse me. 108 00:06:39,870 --> 00:06:42,150 Excuse me. 109 00:06:42,450 --> 00:06:43,490 Okay, quiet, everybody. 110 00:06:45,390 --> 00:06:46,390 Director's trying to speak. 111 00:06:52,460 --> 00:06:53,460 wants to audition now. 112 00:06:53,580 --> 00:06:54,580 I will. 113 00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:56,340 All right, Myrna, what are you going to do for us? 114 00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:59,900 I'm going to do the same thing I did in My Fair Lady without the songs. 115 00:07:00,240 --> 00:07:03,280 There will now be a ten -minute intermission. Thank you. 116 00:07:07,760 --> 00:07:10,960 Thank you. That's a very important part of any play. 117 00:07:12,980 --> 00:07:14,040 Okay, who's next? 118 00:07:16,340 --> 00:07:17,340 George, 119 00:07:17,600 --> 00:07:18,600 you want to audition? 120 00:07:18,640 --> 00:07:21,020 No, I wanted to ask if I could make the sets. 121 00:07:22,060 --> 00:07:23,080 Anyone else want to make the set? 122 00:07:25,540 --> 00:07:26,540 It's yours. 123 00:07:29,460 --> 00:07:31,760 Okay, next. 124 00:07:33,480 --> 00:07:35,420 Stephanie, I didn't know you were going to audition. 125 00:07:35,680 --> 00:07:37,700 Oh, well, I'm not really. 126 00:07:38,060 --> 00:07:43,480 I just realized that I've probably seen a lot more real theater than most people 127 00:07:43,480 --> 00:07:47,920 here. I mean, I've seen My Fair Lady with the songs. 128 00:07:49,060 --> 00:07:52,150 I've seen... West Side Story. I've seen Camelot. 129 00:07:52,390 --> 00:07:55,390 That I saw in Switzerland, by the way, with subtitles. 130 00:07:56,290 --> 00:07:59,550 So I've really seen theater all over the world. 131 00:08:00,470 --> 00:08:01,990 Anyway, I'm here if you need me. 132 00:08:06,750 --> 00:08:08,550 Thank you. I feel better already. 133 00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:11,490 Okay, who's next? 134 00:08:11,810 --> 00:08:13,650...