Richard.Pryor.Live.On.The.Sunset.Strip.1982.720p.WEBRip.x264.AAC-[YTS.MX] Movie Subtitles

1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 2 00:01:42,510 --> 00:01:47,277 Ladies and gentlemen, live on the Sunset Strip, Richard Pryor! 3 00:02:49,744 --> 00:02:52,907 We are gathered here today... 4 00:02:56,884 --> 00:03:00,581 to make sure... 5 00:03:01,723 --> 00:03:04,191 everyone eats. 6 00:03:07,061 --> 00:03:09,689 If not each other... 7 00:03:11,466 --> 00:03:13,991 food. 8 00:03:16,471 --> 00:03:19,167 I was gonna talk about something that's very serious... 9 00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:21,174 and I hope no one gets offended. 10 00:03:21,242 --> 00:03:23,403 I wanna talk about f***g. 11 00:03:25,079 --> 00:03:27,639 And sometimes I talk about it. And a lot of people in the audience... 12 00:03:27,715 --> 00:03:29,740 don't know what I mean. 13 00:03:29,817 --> 00:03:33,651 So would you raise your hand it you don't know what f***g is... 14 00:03:33,721 --> 00:03:36,451 so we can watch your a***s when you leave here? 15 00:03:39,193 --> 00:03:41,593 Because not enough fuckin'... 16 00:03:41,662 --> 00:03:43,596 goin' on in America. 17 00:03:43,664 --> 00:03:47,065 Americans. Reagan get in, you stop fuckin'. 18 00:03:47,135 --> 00:03:50,502 We f***d when Carter was in. We f***d all the time. 19 00:03:50,571 --> 00:03:54,632 There wasn't nothin' else to do. "Hey. Let's f***k." 20 00:03:54,709 --> 00:03:58,201 President makin' a speech. "Let's f***k." 21 00:03:58,279 --> 00:04:00,679 Reagan in. Now. Everybody listen to this motherfucker. 22 00:04:00,748 --> 00:04:02,409 "We can't f***k now." 23 00:04:04,552 --> 00:04:07,544 I say get them last few f***s in now. 24 00:04:15,763 --> 00:04:17,697 See. I know one of the advantages. 25 00:04:17,765 --> 00:04:20,359 When you're in show business, the little extra treat you get... 26 00:04:20,434 --> 00:04:22,095 is that you get p***y. 27 00:04:24,372 --> 00:04:26,067 And, you know... 28 00:04:26,140 --> 00:04:29,234 the great p***y drought of the '50s? 29 00:04:29,310 --> 00:04:31,369 I was caught up in that motherfucker. 30 00:04:33,114 --> 00:04:34,706 I'm talkin' about... 31 00:04:36,884 --> 00:04:41,617 I discovered masturbating by accident. 32 00:04:41,689 --> 00:04:45,090 I'm not lying. I was about ten. I was in the tub. 33 00:04:45,159 --> 00:04:49,186 And that's when you used to have to hold your d***k with two fingers. 34 00:04:51,332 --> 00:04:53,732 You remember when you was little like that? 35 00:04:57,305 --> 00:05:00,763 Right? I was in the tub. 36 00:05:00,842 --> 00:05:02,833 I said. "Hey. 37 00:05:05,813 --> 00:05:07,974 I'm on to something here. 38 00:05:09,050 --> 00:05:11,575 I bet Dad don't know about this." 39 00:05:13,855 --> 00:05:15,789 And then when you was young, remember. Men... 40 00:05:15,857 --> 00:05:19,224 We didn't come or nothin'. You just made that tunny feelin'. 41 00:05:19,293 --> 00:05:21,227 You know. You... 42 00:05:22,830 --> 00:05:26,664 First time I came, ejaculated. Scared the f***k out of me. Man. 43 00:05:26,734 --> 00:05:28,929 I thought somethin' was wrong. Right? 44 00:05:29,003 --> 00:05:32,063 I was with this woman. I said. "Look what the f***k you done did!" 45 00:05:34,275 --> 00:05:37,438 About an hour later though. I was back goin'. "Can you do it again?" 46 00:05:41,182 --> 00:05:44,117 Women are so cool about s***x. They like it as much as we do. 47 00:05:44,185 --> 00:05:45,914 But they can be cooler. 48 00:05:45,987 --> 00:05:48,649 You say, "Do you wanna f***k?" "No." 49 00:05:48,723 --> 00:05:51,749 And they go home and have all that electrical equipment. 50 00:05:56,364 --> 00:05:59,390 I can't get off behind that long s***t. 51 00:05:59,467 --> 00:06:01,059 Nothin'. 52 00:06:02,637 --> 00:06:06,368 I remember one time I g***t some Playboy bunny p***y. 53 00:06:06,440 --> 00:06:09,307 I thought I was in the big time. 54 00:06:09,377 --> 00:06:13,370 Goin' home with a Playboy bunny! You dig? 55 00:06:13,447 --> 00:06:16,905 We was gonna have a nice little midnight snack. 56 00:06:16,984 --> 00:06:20,613 I went to her apartment. Her apartment was bad! 57 00:06:20,688 --> 00:06:22,622 It was one of those apartments that if I don't get the p***y... 58 00:06:22,690 --> 00:06:24,624 I can f***k this couch. 59 00:06:31,432 --> 00:06:33,957 We started talkin'. She had seen my act. 60 00:06:34,035 --> 00:06:37,402 She said, "I really like the way you do those little kids in your act. 61 00:06:37,471 --> 00:06:40,497 Them's great. Can you talk like a little kid?" 62 00:06:44,745 --> 00:06:47,270 I said. "What? Now?" 63 00:06:47,348 --> 00:06:49,612 "Yeah. Just do a little." 64 00:06:49,684 --> 00:06:52,448 "I feel funny. I mean... okay. 65 00:06:52,520 --> 00:06:55,080 You mean. Like, when I do this? Like that?" 66 00:06:55,156 --> 00:06:58,023 She said, "Yeah." 67 00:07:02,596 --> 00:07:04,723 I say. "You like that. Huh?" 68 00:07:06,334 --> 00:07:09,428 And she started taking off clothes. 69 00:07:09,503 --> 00:07:14,338 And the more clothes she took oft. The younger I g***t. 70 00:07:14,408 --> 00:07:18,310 When she g***t to her panties. I was on the floor talking about... 71 00:07:25,152 --> 00:07:27,950 She gave birth to me about 9:30. 72 00:07:32,660 --> 00:07:34,753 Can I get some water? 73 00:07:34,829 --> 00:07:37,093 There was supposed to be a stool and some water. 74 00:07:37,164 --> 00:07:39,394 Is it April Fools'? Oh. This is the one. 75 00:07:39,467 --> 00:07:43,563 I have to walk way the f***k over there to get some water. 76 00:07:43,637 --> 00:07:45,571 Thank you. Brother. Don't trip. You're nervouser than me. 77 00:07:45,639 --> 00:07:47,869 S***t. Thank you. 78 00:07:47,942 --> 00:07:50,433 I wish I had had a pitcher of that s***t. 79 00:07:52,580 --> 00:07:54,013 Thank you. 80 00:07:57,351 --> 00:08:00,286 - What's in it? - Huh? Water. 81 00:08:00,354 --> 00:08:02,379 As far as I know. 82 00:08:02,456 --> 00:08:04,856 I hope I don't start tripping. 83 00:08:08,062 --> 00:08:09,996 Did that... Was that here all the time? 84 00:08:14,535 --> 00:08:16,867 That motherfucker been there all the time? 85 00:08:18,973 --> 00:08:20,964 Wait a minute. We don't know nothin'... 86 00:08:21,042 --> 00:08:23,101 but the photographic memory. 87 00:08:23,177 --> 00:08:25,111 This motherfucker was not here. 88 00:08:26,180 --> 00:08:29,343 See. We may not be literate. But we visual than a motherfucker. 89 00:08:37,491 --> 00:08:39,755 Just needed a little water... 90 00:08:39,827 --> 00:08:41,522 to relax... 91 00:08:41,595 --> 00:08:43,187 calm down. 92 00:08:44,398 --> 00:08:46,332 'Cause I feel the tension from you all. 93 00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:49,528 You all want me to do so well. I want to do so well for you. 94 00:08:49,603 --> 00:08:52,094 But let's relax and enjoy... 95 00:08:52,173 --> 00:08:54,334 whatever the f***k happens. 96 00:08:55,676 --> 00:08:57,667 'Cause I g***t my check. 97 00:09:02,550 --> 00:09:06,714 I'm gonna tell you something. I g***t so fuckin' nervous... 98 00:09:06,787 --> 00:09:10,883 myself. Today. I forgot what the f***k I did. 99 00:09:10,958 --> 00:09:14,655 I was at home. I said, "I know I do somethin'... 100 00:09:14,728 --> 00:09:18,129 'cause there's too many white folks paying attention to me... 101 00:09:21,869 --> 00:09:24,702 for me not to be in jail and s***t." 102 00:09:28,576 --> 00:09:30,703 I used to think when I first started. I said... 103 00:09:30,778 --> 00:09:32,973 "Maybe I ain't tunny no more. You know. 104 00:09:33,047 --> 00:09:36,915 Maybe I ain't angry at nothin' tor real in my heart, you know." 105 00:09:36,984 --> 00:09:39,475 I'd just say. "I'm just not mad about it. 106 00:09:39,553 --> 00:09:44,013 I don't get it. Motherfuckers wanna kill yourselves. That's your business. 107 00:09:44,091 --> 00:09:46,184 Just don't do it on my porch." 108 00:09:47,895 --> 00:09:51,991 And it really takes a lot to start workin' again on stage... 109 00:09:52,066 --> 00:09:54,091 because then your mind ain't there and your spirit... 110 00:09:54,168 --> 00:09:57,569 and you're tryin' to go for it. And greed is a bitch. 111 00:09:57,638 --> 00:09:59,936 Greed says, "Go ahead and do it. They offer you so much money... 112 00:10:00,007 --> 00:10:01,531 and you're greedy." 113 00:10:01,609 --> 00:10:03,702 And then your manager is larger than anything, right? 114 00:10:03,777 --> 00:10:07,076 He says. "But you're not like that. You don't want to rip people oft. 115 00:10:07,148 --> 00:10:09,776 You try and do the best... 116 00:10:09,850 --> 00:10:13,183 and you go out there and you make an a***s of yourself... 117 00:10:13,254 --> 00:10:17,122 embarrass your friends. Hold your d***k." 118 00:10:18,859 --> 00:10:22,625 My greed does not exceed my self-respect. 119 00:10:22,696 --> 00:10:25,130 My greed is good. Though. 120 00:10:25,199 --> 00:10:29,363 Greed is runnin' a close motherfuckin' second. 121 00:10:29,436 --> 00:10:32,530 When I'm asleep. Greed is workin' on the self-respect somewhere. 122 00:10:32,606 --> 00:10:35,234 "Say. Why don't you just do it tor a little more?" 123 00:10:36,610 --> 00:10:40,046 But I do a lot of s***t now that I never did when I didn't have money. 124 00:10:40,114 --> 00:10:44,608 I didn't have the problems I have now, like watchin' motherfuckers count it. 125 00:10:49,190 -->...