Little.Nicky.2000.720p.BluRay.x264.AAC-[YTS.MX]-eng Movie Subtitles

1 00:00:36,690 --> 00:00:38,900 Let me show you what I made today. 2 00:00:39,360 --> 00:00:41,270 I can't wait. 3 00:00:41,740 --> 00:00:43,400 I need to go upstairs and change... 4 00:00:43,870 --> 00:00:45,570 and then I'll start dinner. 5 00:01:05,760 --> 00:01:08,800 Oh, yes, it's ladies night, and the feel-- 6 00:01:09,270 --> 00:01:10,730 Showtime. 7 00:01:15,230 --> 00:01:17,390 Rough day at the office, Mrs. Dunleavy? 8 00:01:17,860 --> 00:01:20,610 You'll feel better once you get out of those work clothes. 9 00:01:21,070 --> 00:01:23,360 And into some sweats. 10 00:01:26,910 --> 00:01:30,570 I wish you'd let me rub those feet. 11 00:01:31,040 --> 00:01:33,450 Of course, I wouldn't use my hands. 12 00:01:46,430 --> 00:01:49,960 I think Victoria just told me her secret. 13 00:01:56,060 --> 00:02:00,190 Deedly dee. Are those things for me? 14 00:02:04,990 --> 00:02:07,440 Mom, coming in. 15 00:02:07,910 --> 00:02:10,400 Scottie Dunleavy? 16 00:02:10,870 --> 00:02:13,110 What unfortunate timing. 17 00:02:13,580 --> 00:02:17,710 Get out. Don't you know this is naughty time? 18 00:02:18,170 --> 00:02:19,330 I'll get it. 19 00:02:22,510 --> 00:02:25,080 Hello, Scottie. Why don't you be a good little boy... 20 00:02:25,550 --> 00:02:28,220 go downstairs and let your mother get comfy? 21 00:02:28,680 --> 00:02:29,760 Who is this? 22 00:02:30,220 --> 00:02:32,760 This is a big bird who wants to see the rest of Mommy. 23 00:02:39,070 --> 00:02:41,850 Oh, my God, Scottie. Is that a man up our tree? 24 00:02:42,320 --> 00:02:44,940 No, no. Tell her it's just a big bird. 25 00:03:07,930 --> 00:03:09,300 Hey, pal, welcome. 26 00:03:09,760 --> 00:03:12,720 Welcome to what? Where ** I? 27 00:03:13,180 --> 00:03:15,550 Aren't you that horny guy who was pretending to be a big bird? 28 00:03:16,020 --> 00:03:18,140 Checking out that beautiful mom? 29 00:03:18,600 --> 00:03:19,800 Yes, I **. 30 00:03:20,270 --> 00:03:23,520 Now you'll see what a big horny bird actually looks like... 31 00:03:23,980 --> 00:03:25,530 in Hell! 32 00:03:35,660 --> 00:03:39,000 I deserve this! 33 00:04:09,160 --> 00:04:12,490 - Knock, knock. - Hey, Jimmy. 34 00:04:12,950 --> 00:04:15,190 - What are you doing, Nicky? - Just jamming. 35 00:04:15,660 --> 00:04:18,370 Your father wants you and your brothers in the throne room. 36 00:04:18,830 --> 00:04:20,790 He's not retiring today, is he? 37 00:04:21,250 --> 00:04:22,960 He wants to talk to you and Cassius and Adrian... 38 00:04:23,420 --> 00:04:25,830 about who'll rule Hell for the next 10,000 years. 39 00:04:26,300 --> 00:04:28,870 Why do I need to go? He won't pick me. 40 00:04:29,340 --> 00:04:32,300 I happen to think you'd make a great Devil. 41 00:04:32,760 --> 00:04:35,550 I'm not into evil and torture and all that stuff. 42 00:04:36,020 --> 00:04:38,770 Plus, the Prince of Darkness should look distinguished... 43 00:04:39,230 --> 00:04:42,350 and let's face facts, I'm no George Clooney. 44 00:04:42,810 --> 00:04:44,770 You're not a bad-looking guy, Nicky. 45 00:04:45,230 --> 00:04:46,690 Look at that picture. 46 00:04:49,360 --> 00:04:50,640 I used to talk normal, too... 47 00:04:51,110 --> 00:04:54,360 before Cassius hit me in the face with a shovel. 48 00:04:54,830 --> 00:04:57,610 That's me now, and I accept it. 49 00:04:58,080 --> 00:05:00,870 Your brothers are two of the sickest guys I've ever seen. 50 00:05:01,330 --> 00:05:03,820 For some reason, you're not. Nothing to be ashamed of. 51 00:05:04,290 --> 00:05:07,540 Their mothers were fire dragons and mine was a goat. 52 00:05:08,010 --> 00:05:09,170 How do I compete with that? 53 00:05:09,630 --> 00:05:12,880 Your mother was not a goat. They're just playing with you. 54 00:05:13,340 --> 00:05:16,590 If one of those psychos gets picked, I'm doomed. 55 00:05:17,060 --> 00:05:19,100 I knew it, Adrian. He's finally retiring. 56 00:05:19,560 --> 00:05:24,770 Cassius, I've been waiting on this day for 10,000 years. 57 00:05:27,270 --> 00:05:28,560 If the old man picks me to take over Hell... 58 00:05:29,030 --> 00:05:33,270 I'll keep torture going 24-7. No breaks. 59 00:05:33,740 --> 00:05:34,770 Whoa, mama! 60 00:05:35,240 --> 00:05:37,810 You g***t him right in the eye. 61 00:05:38,290 --> 00:05:41,240 Hey! How's Daddy's little girl doing today? 62 00:05:41,710 --> 00:05:44,330 I didn't see you guys. What's up? 63 00:05:44,790 --> 00:05:46,830 Shovel face, you want to mind-wrestle? 64 00:05:47,290 --> 00:05:48,370 Nah, I'm all right. 65 00:05:48,840 --> 00:05:50,660 I was thinking of chilling out by the throne for a bit. 66 00:05:51,130 --> 00:05:53,420 I'm going to mind-wrestle you whether you like it or not. 67 00:05:53,880 --> 00:05:56,340 I have to warn you, I'm getting pretty good at it. 68 00:05:56,800 --> 00:05:59,180 Then I guess I can't make you do this. 69 00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:03,340 Mercy. You win. I give. Game over. 70 00:06:03,810 --> 00:06:05,090 What are you boys doing? 71 00:06:08,020 --> 00:06:11,640 Nothing, Dad. Just hitting the old punching bags. 72 00:06:12,110 --> 00:06:13,190 Cassius... 73 00:06:13,650 --> 00:06:16,570 didn't I tell you to stay out of your brother's mind? 74 00:06:17,030 --> 00:06:18,440 I forgot. 75 00:06:18,910 --> 00:06:20,700 Maybe this will help you remember. 76 00:06:24,620 --> 00:06:27,380 Now, everybody come sit down. 77 00:06:27,840 --> 00:06:30,120 - Hey, Dad. - Yes, son? 78 00:06:30,590 --> 00:06:31,700 I know you g***t a lot on your mind... 79 00:06:32,170 --> 00:06:35,210 but I almost finished that Monsters of Metal compilation. 80 00:06:35,680 --> 00:06:37,720 I really think it's turning into a masterpiece. 81 00:06:38,180 --> 00:06:39,670 Okay, kid. We'll listen to it later. 82 00:06:40,140 --> 00:06:41,600 Thanks. 83 00:06:45,350 --> 00:06:47,640 A window. 84 00:06:48,110 --> 00:06:52,020 Hello, Mr. Devil. I like your cape. 85 00:07:00,160 --> 00:07:02,120 I deserve this! 86 00:07:02,580 --> 00:07:07,370 Fellas, this, as some of you might know... 87 00:07:07,830 --> 00:07:11,620 is my 10,000th year as Prince of Darkness... 88 00:07:12,090 --> 00:07:15,210 so I think the time has come to discuss who will succeed me. 89 00:07:15,670 --> 00:07:18,130 - Knock, knock. - Yes, Jimmy? 90 00:07:18,590 --> 00:07:19,670 Don't forget-- 91 00:07:20,140 --> 00:07:23,510 you're shoving a pineapple up Hitler's a***s at four p.m. 92 00:07:26,270 --> 00:07:29,520 This was a very difficult decision... 93 00:07:29,980 --> 00:07:32,650 because I have three wonderful sons. 94 00:07:33,110 --> 00:07:36,860 Adrian--so smart, so ruthless. 95 00:07:37,320 --> 00:07:38,350 Wears makeup. 96 00:07:38,820 --> 00:07:42,690 And Cassius-- so strong, so tough. 97 00:07:43,160 --> 00:07:44,990 Don't forget clinically insane. 98 00:07:45,450 --> 00:07:47,110 And Nicky... 99 00:07:48,460 --> 00:07:50,280 such a sweet boy. 100 00:07:52,040 --> 00:07:56,840 But after much thought and careful consideration... 101 00:07:57,300 --> 00:08:00,470 I've decided that the ruler for the next 10,000 years... 102 00:08:00,930 --> 00:08:02,390 is going to have to be... 103 00:08:05,100 --> 00:08:06,010 me. 104 00:08:06,480 --> 00:08:07,890 - What? - Hallelujah! 105 00:08:08,350 --> 00:08:10,680 I mean, that s***s! 106 00:08:11,150 --> 00:08:13,390 The important thing for the stability of our rule... 107 00:08:13,860 --> 00:08:16,270 is to maintain the balance between good and evil... 108 00:08:16,740 --> 00:08:20,070 and I don't think any of you are ready for that responsibility. 109 00:08:20,530 --> 00:08:22,440 Dad, this is bullshit! 110 00:08:22,910 --> 00:08:25,830 I don't like that language. 111 00:08:28,660 --> 00:08:29,610 Right. Send him in. 112 00:08:30,080 --> 00:08:31,710 Sorry, boys. I have to get back to work. 113 00:08:32,170 --> 00:08:33,660 It was good hanging with you, Dad. 114 00:08:34,130 --> 00:08:35,120 I'll check you later. 115 00:09:00,570 --> 00:09:01,730 You're serious? 116 00:09:14,090 --> 00:09:15,990 Off, off, off! 117 00:09:17,420 --> 00:09:18,450 D***n! 118 00:09:18,920 --> 00:09:20,920 Twenty thousand years ago, Grandpa Lucifer said... 119 00:09:21,380 --> 00:09:25,050 "It's better to rule in Hell than to serve in Heaven." 120 00:09:25,510 --> 00:09:28,600 Well, I'm tired of serving in Hell. 121 00:09:29,060 --> 00:09:32,260 We need somewhere where we can rule. 122 00:09:35,560 --> 00:09:38,520 Bring it on, big man. Let's see what you g***t. 123 00:09:41,280 --> 00:09:44,690 Could you concentrate for five seconds? 124 00:09:45,160 --> 00:09:46,490 I ** concentrating, man. 125 00:09:46,950 --> 00:09:48,070 I'm sorry. 126 00:09:48,540 --> 00:09:51,110 After careful consideration, I must respectfully decline. 127 00:09:51,580 --> 00:09:53,120 I can't stand retirement. 128 00:09:53,580 --> 00:09:55,580 Just let me win one Super Bowl. 129 00:09:56,040 --> 00:09:58,960 In exchange for eternal damnation of your soul? 130 00:09:59,420 --> 00:10:02,040 You're much too nice a guy for that, Mr. Marino. 131 00:10:02,510 --> 00:10:03,880 You did it for Namath. 132 00:10:04,340 --> 00:10:05,540 Joe was coming here anyways. 133 00:10:06,010 --> 00:10:07,390 This s***s. 134 00:10:07,850 --> 00:10:09,260 I'll go to the Super Bowl as an announcer... 135 00:10:09,720 -->...