My.Stepmother.is.an.Alien.1988..eng Movie Subtitles

1 00:02:27,389 --> 00:02:29,599 Hey, love your umbrella. 2 00:02:44,655 --> 00:02:47,908 -Dr. Mills. Dr. Budlong. -Morosini, Carvalho, come with me. 3 00:02:50,369 --> 00:02:54,998 If he thinks he's going to ruin any more equipment he's underestimated the facility. 4 00:03:01,338 --> 00:03:05,175 -He thinks he's cute, doesn't he? -Yes, but I was mother's favourite. 5 00:03:05,509 --> 00:03:06,635 Dr. Mills. 6 00:03:08,512 --> 00:03:12,349 -This is the last time I'll warn you. -I won't let the Klystron go above 300. 7 00:03:12,474 --> 00:03:15,727 That's what you said last time it rained, but you turned it to 350. 8 00:03:15,852 --> 00:03:18,563 Do you know what it costs to repair a Klystron tube? 9 00:03:18,688 --> 00:03:22,483 I know, Dr. Budlong. I'm very sorry, but believe me it won't happen again. 10 00:03:22,608 --> 00:03:25,110 You have my word on that, and I promise. 11 00:03:25,653 --> 00:03:29,365 Don't worry. He can't go blowing up your Klyman tube or whatever it is. 12 00:03:29,490 --> 00:03:32,242 We've g***t a date tonight, happy hour at Mingles. 13 00:03:32,368 --> 00:03:34,495 Mingles. You know what that means? 14 00:03:34,787 --> 00:03:35,621 What? 15 00:03:35,913 --> 00:03:37,915 It means complimentary hors d'oeuvres. 16 00:03:38,040 --> 00:03:41,001 A veritable who's who of secretaries and beauticians. 17 00:03:41,126 --> 00:03:43,212 It means 20th century music. 18 00:03:43,837 --> 00:03:47,549 You look like a sensible man. You believe there's life on other planets? 19 00:03:47,674 --> 00:03:50,761 -I don't believe there's life in this room. -Exactly. 20 00:03:51,220 --> 00:03:55,390 Your brother wants to send a radar signal to a point in space so far away... 21 00:03:55,557 --> 00:03:58,602 ...it'd take 92 years to get there and 92 years to get back. 22 00:03:58,727 --> 00:04:01,063 Ninety-two years? Steve, we're late now. 23 00:04:01,188 --> 00:04:04,691 Indeed. There isn't anything out there, Dr. Mills. 24 00:04:04,816 --> 00:04:05,859 We're it. 25 00:04:06,652 --> 00:04:10,739 Now don't you go above 300 or I'm revoking your funding. 26 00:04:14,408 --> 00:04:17,787 Now that Dr. Strangelove is gone, let's go. Mingles is at high party. 27 00:04:17,912 --> 00:04:19,455 I can't tonight, Ron. 28 00:04:20,998 --> 00:04:22,083 It's raining. 29 00:04:22,208 --> 00:04:26,128 Tonight I've g***t another destination in mind. I wanna go right there. 30 00:04:27,922 --> 00:04:32,009 Clouds of Magellan. It sounds like some kind of woman's underwear. 31 00:04:32,718 --> 00:04:35,930 No, the Clouds of Magellan is the name of our neighbouring galaxy. 32 00:04:36,055 --> 00:04:38,390 You want to send a radar signal to the next galaxy? 33 00:04:38,515 --> 00:04:40,434 You can't get radar to the next galaxy. 34 00:04:40,559 --> 00:04:44,063 You'd have to travel faster than the speed of light. No one can do that. 35 00:04:44,188 --> 00:04:47,191 Don't watch that, it won't change. This is the one to watch. 36 00:04:47,316 --> 00:04:48,984 I like the Clouds of Magellan. 37 00:04:49,068 --> 00:04:50,611 We can't get there, Ron. 38 00:04:50,736 --> 00:04:53,781 But if we increase the power of the Klystron, with lightning... 39 00:04:53,906 --> 00:04:57,242 ...we may get a signal strong enough to get out of the solar system. 40 00:04:57,367 --> 00:04:58,744 That's the theory, anyway. 41 00:04:58,869 --> 00:05:02,371 Right. Thanks. Tell me something I don't know. 42 00:05:04,874 --> 00:05:08,544 Can't this wait? Secretaries are like animals when it comes to free food. 43 00:05:08,669 --> 00:05:11,714 The reflectors line up for 10 days only once every 19 months. 44 00:05:11,839 --> 00:05:14,508 Now, with all this rain and lightning, it's perfect. 45 00:05:14,550 --> 00:05:16,093 Perfect for men like us. 46 00:05:16,177 --> 00:05:19,847 Christ! Steve, when was the last time you went out with a woman? 47 00:05:21,223 --> 00:05:24,477 January of '86. No. March of '86. 48 00:05:25,394 --> 00:05:29,273 I took Dr. Elizabeth Conway to see the Halley's Comet retrospective. 49 00:05:29,398 --> 00:05:30,358 Superb. 50 00:05:30,483 --> 00:05:32,568 -You see it? -Sure, a couple of times. 51 00:05:32,693 --> 00:05:36,197 How can we be brothers? We don't have a single gene in common. 52 00:05:37,364 --> 00:05:40,034 -Not above 300 kilowatts. -Hi. 53 00:05:42,953 --> 00:05:45,748 Okay. Thank you. Have fun. 54 00:05:47,958 --> 00:05:51,712 We have no time to sweep frequencies. We'll lower it below three centimetres. 55 00:05:51,837 --> 00:05:53,796 But below? 56 00:05:54,422 --> 00:05:57,091 It's raining out here. I'm getting wet! 57 00:05:57,884 --> 00:06:00,386 This jacket is a Ralph Lauren! 58 00:06:01,012 --> 00:06:02,430 And it's smelly. 59 00:06:02,680 --> 00:06:04,098 Great, just great. 60 00:06:04,223 --> 00:06:07,185 I'm wet and smelly. They're gonna jump all over me. 61 00:06:12,523 --> 00:06:14,942 Do you guys smell fish? 62 00:06:19,989 --> 00:06:21,449 It's me! 63 00:06:33,753 --> 00:06:37,423 -Help me rotate the dish. -Where's this lightning supposed to strike? 64 00:06:37,548 --> 00:06:38,674 Right here. 65 00:06:39,967 --> 00:06:40,926 Here? 66 00:06:43,428 --> 00:06:45,263 That almost hit my shoe. 67 00:06:47,557 --> 00:06:48,767 Excuse me. 68 00:06:54,481 --> 00:06:55,690 All the way up. 69 00:07:06,284 --> 00:07:08,953 I hate this. What the hell is this thing? 70 00:07:09,329 --> 00:07:13,708 Klystron tube. Potential of 400 megawatts, at an oscillation of 60 gigahertz. 71 00:07:14,042 --> 00:07:16,210 Great. Why don't we take this to Mingles? 72 00:07:19,297 --> 00:07:21,299 Stupid piece of garbage. 73 00:07:24,052 --> 00:07:26,721 Now all we gotta do is harness the lightning. 74 00:07:41,067 --> 00:07:44,112 Yes, it's good. Let's try for lightning. 75 00:07:44,279 --> 00:07:46,573 -Is this important? -Only if it works. 76 00:07:47,115 --> 00:07:49,576 Okay, deep breath. Set your retractors. 77 00:07:49,909 --> 00:07:53,705 How long is this gonna take? Single women have short attention spans. 78 00:07:55,373 --> 00:07:57,292 Prepare to initiate the system. 79 00:07:58,418 --> 00:07:59,627 Now! 80 00:08:00,336 --> 00:08:01,838 Oh, Jesus! 81 00:08:06,509 --> 00:08:08,553 -We g***t it! -Look at it! 82 00:08:10,054 --> 00:08:12,515 It's going! I love you! 83 00:08:38,248 --> 00:08:39,875 What is happening? 84 00:08:40,751 --> 00:08:43,503 Steve! What's happening? 85 00:08:46,840 --> 00:08:47,883 Mills! 86 00:08:48,550 --> 00:08:49,593 Mills! 87 00:08:50,177 --> 00:08:52,220 What is happening? 88 00:09:01,688 --> 00:09:03,189 The Klystron! 89 00:09:23,417 --> 00:09:25,961 We have a red condition in the second unit. 90 00:09:26,378 --> 00:09:28,839 Fire control! The laboratory area. 91 00:09:33,635 --> 00:09:34,803 I'm okay. 92 00:09:40,726 --> 00:09:42,352 Beautiful! 93 00:09:46,189 --> 00:09:47,190 What? 94 00:09:48,108 --> 00:09:49,067 My God! 95 00:09:49,484 --> 00:09:52,988 I didn't only get out of the solar system, I just went out of the galaxy. 96 00:09:53,113 --> 00:09:56,116 That means we were travelling faster than the speed of light. 97 00:09:56,241 --> 00:09:57,951 How the hell did we do that? 98 00:10:17,219 --> 00:10:18,762 Eleven seconds on the clock. 99 00:10:18,887 --> 00:10:21,724 Down by one. Mills fakes left. Goes around Magic Johnson. 100 00:10:21,849 --> 00:10:24,226 Puts Kareem in the popcorn machine. 101 00:10:31,483 --> 00:10:36,447 Why can't I dunk? Is that asking so much? 102 00:10:48,458 --> 00:10:51,128 You g***t out of the galaxy and they fired you? 103 00:10:52,170 --> 00:10:55,047 We were using lightning to boost the power of the Klystron. 104 00:10:55,172 --> 00:10:58,509 I shorted every telemetry tracker in the place and all my monitors. 105 00:10:58,634 --> 00:11:00,136 So there's no proof. 106 00:11:02,179 --> 00:11:03,514 That's not fair. 107 00:11:04,265 --> 00:11:05,975 What are we going to do? 108 00:11:06,767 --> 00:11:09,270 I might just have to take a.... 109 00:11:10,104 --> 00:11:10,980 What? 110 00:11:11,397 --> 00:11:12,898 Take a teaching job. 111 00:11:14,275 --> 00:11:17,319 You know how that is? One position for every 16 applicants. 112 00:11:17,444 --> 00:11:19,280 I could double my babysitting. 113 00:11:19,405 --> 00:11:21,323 Or take up a newspaper route. 114 00:11:21,991 --> 00:11:23,534 Do girls do that now? 115 00:11:26,161 --> 00:11:28,289 It's beautiful up there. 116 00:11:30,541 --> 00:11:33,002 Two hundred billion stars in our galaxy. 117 00:11:33,711 --> 00:11:35,838 That's really my office up there. 118 00:11:36,672 --> 00:11:40,718 I wish Mom could have lived long enough to see you get out of the galaxy. 119 00:11:40,884 --> 00:11:43,720 She'd be having the whole block in for champagne! 120 00:11:46,431 --> 00:11:49,100 Think you'll ever find anyone like her again? 121 00:11:51,227 --> 00:11:53,688 Boy. Jess, I don't know. 122 00:11:54,897 --> 00:11:58,359 The chances of me finding another woman like your mother are the same... 123 00:11:58,484 --> 00:12:02,613 ...as me proving there's life on another planet up there. Figure one in 16 billion. 124 00:12:05,533 --> 00:12:08,035 All right, Larry Byrd, what's for dinner? 125 00:12:08,160 --> 00:12:09,787 Fish sticks. Pop tarts. 126 00:12:09,912 --> 00:12:13,207 Frozen pizza. Whatever else we can nuke in the microwave. 127...